DARK DEEDS

45

Home? I cannot come home with him. Not when Nikolai is set to pick me up and I cannot be at Salvatore's house. Neither can he be here with me. It will ruin it all. I take a breath.

“I cannot leave all my stuff in a mess like this Salvatore.” I tell him — arms crossed as I look everywhere but in his direction.

He comes in front of me, blocking my view, and tilting my head up to look at him and only him. I swallow hard. “You cannot be here,. Carina. Clearly, whoever did this hates you, and if they come back and find you here; trust me, they do much worse.”

“I don’t care. I am not leaving my stuff!” I yell at him, pushing him out of my face. I then turn around, and set my things done; more than ready to stay. I wet a rug and wipe the words on the mirror, then I clear the bed.

Just as I am about to get the broom, Salvatore gently takes ahold of me, wrapping his arms around me, as he whispers into my ear, “I’m sorry, I know how hard this is for you, and I’m making it even harder for you. I’ll call some people to clear this all out, right now. And we can stay and wait together.”

His words completely and utterly obliterated me. He wants to stay with me, and he actually seems to care. This should not be surprising at all but for someone who’d gotten so used to caring for themselves and being alone? This is new, and surprising and yet, I need to ruin it.

I push him away once more, tears in my eyes, as I say, “No. I do not like strangers touching my stuff. I will handle it on my own.”

“Then, I'll help you.” He tells me, more tears coming to my eyes, and that huge lump painfully rising up my throat.

“Salvatore,” I take a deep, deep breath, “I appreciate everything. The gifts, the dinner, and your help, but you need to leave.”

“Why?” He furrows his eyebrows, taking my hand in his this time. I withdraw my hands.

Tears rolling down my face, at my next words, “I cannot forgive you the hell you put my mother through when you murdered her! I cannot forgive you for the hell you put me through when you left me, and I found you and Candle kissing right after you’d taken my virginity! I cannot forgive  you for leaving me again, and insulting mde over Candle, that night in Russia. The same Candle that wanted me to be raped to death! That is why!”

“Carina, I thought we were over this.”

“Over? How do I get over all that!” I yell. “You just don't understand, and that is why we cannot be together, Salvatore. Just leave me alone, please.”

“Carina, no. Don’t do this.” He pleads with me and for the first time, I see tears in his eyes. He hugs me, holding me tight. “I don't want to lose you.”

I push him back once more, “Leave me alone, Salvatore.”

He tries to hug me once more, but a voice springs up from behind, and my stomach goes all queasy. I do not even need to turn around to know who it is. It is Nikolai.

“Leave her alone,” Nikolai commands, a sense of deja Vu coming over me.

Just as Nikolai is about to pull me towards him, Salvatore beats him to it; rather roughly pushing me behind him.

“Don’t touch her,” Salvatore grits through his teeth, his face going red from anger in a matter of seconds. I know that if I don’t intervene, this will get bloody.

I intertwine my hand into Salvatore’s hand before I say, “Nikolai, can you give us a moment please.”

He scans the mess in the room, worry taking over his face. He steps out, nonetheless but not before saying, “I’ll be outside if you need me.”

I take a deep breath once the door is shut. Salvatore crosses his arms, looking down at me with anger in his eyes.

“There is no assignment, is there?” He spits in disgust, “You did all this just so you could get away from me and be with him.”

“Salvatore—”

“I get it, you don’t owe me any explanations, Carina.” He says, removing his hand from mine.

I want to say something, anything but nothing comes, even as he heads out my door. When Nikolai heads in, I fall into tears all over again.

“We need to go.” he tells me. “We have a 5hr flight ahead of us.”

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The cold air welcomes us to Russia. I curse myself for not wearing something warmer but Nikolai, being Nikolai shrugs out of his coat, and wraps it around me.

We then proceed to the car in a rush. Everything has been done in a rush. It makes me wonder but I do not open my mouth. I silently slide into the car and stare at the snowfall.

I think back to Salvatore and what he thinks of me. Had I not cried the whole way here, I would have started crying again. He seemed serious about me this time and now, now I've ruined it all for myself.

Perhaps it is for the best. Too much has happened between us; too much to ignore. This is for the best. I chant that over and over again until we pull up to the big stony mansion from last time.

I brace myself as the door is pulled open for me. My boots crunch the snow covering the place, as I set foot out of the car. I am then guided into the house.

I expect to see my dad and Caterina, but to my surprise, I see neither one. All I see is the Russian boss, all dressed in black like a cat. She turns around, her stare piercing through me.

“Carina,” She smiles, “I’m glad you could make it.”

‘It’s not like I had a choice.’ I want to respond but hold my tongue.

“Want some wine?” she offers, as I shake my head. She has none herself as she walks over to her living room, ushering me towards the chairs. “Sit.”

I do as she says, sitting down before she goes on talking, “I have bad news...”

She takes a deep breath, pursing her lips. We sit in silence for a while; anxiety eating me up. I urge her to continue, “Go on.”

She lets out another breath before breaking the news, “Your father and sister, Caterina are dead.”

...
Sorry for the typos.

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