I Lost A Bet

Here Goes Nothing

Hades sighed deeply; he seemed to be doing that a lot these days. Hecate grinned malevolently from her perch on his couch as he tidied up the dishes from that morning's brunch.

"Are you sure there's no way out of this?" he asked exasperatedly even though he knew the answer.

"Nope, you swore to do the FIRST thing I suggested, I couldn't change this if I wanted, which I most definitely do not," she smirked, "Next time you go drinking, think before you pick up the phone old friend." Hades groaned into his hands as she continued, "I am going to have so much fun watching you make a fool of yourself on live television. You didn't tell your brothers, right?"

"No," he sighed, "That would kind of defeat the point of singing with a mask on, wouldn't it."

"Don't get snarky with me, mister," she grinned, "you dug your own grave here." He hadn't seen Hecate this excited in eons, too bad he was the butt of the joke. Hades rolled his eyes and flopped exaggeratedly on to the couch.

"So let me get this straight," he said, "I'm participating in a reality singing competition.... In a ridiculous costume and mask... on television... and the judges, who are people I WORK with, by the way, are going to try to guess my identity."

"Yup!" she responded with a grin, sounding way too chipper. She could've chosen literally anything, from his limitless fortune to his title and CEO of the company, but instead, she decided to humiliate him on television for all of Olympus to see. He should probably feel relieved, but honestly, he was just filled with dread.

"Hecate, you are truly a cruel mistress," he groaned, "You know that I'm tone-deaf."

"No," she responded, "I know you say you're tone-deaf, but the few times I've heard you sing a drunken ditty, you weren't half bad." Hades blushed furiously as Hecate cackled at his deer-in-headlights expression. He really needed to get this whole drinking thing under control; he definitely did not remember singing for Hecate in the last century. "Besides, you should have thought of that before swearing on the River Styx while blackout drunk," she continued.

"Well, I thought you would ask for a raise, not for me to publicly humiliate myself?!" Hades replied, flustered.

"Well, it's too bad; you should have been more specific," she snarked. "Besides, I've always wanted to see you in leather." Hades groaned into the cushion,

"Finnnneeeeee, but I get to choose the song," he grumbled.

"Awww, but I wanted you to serenade the judges with some classic Ass-pollo singles," Hecate said between giggles. Hades mimed gagging at the very thought.

"I'd rather burn for eternity in Styx then even utter the lyrics to one of his songs," he deadpanned.

"You mean I'm never going to have the pleasure of hearing "Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy)" live? What a terrible shame," she responded, struggling to keep a straight face. They just stared at each other for a second before breaking out into laughter. He may have to disgrace himself in front of every immortal being in existence, but maybe it will blow over in a couple centuries (who was he kidding, he was never going to live this down).

"So," she asked, sobering up, "what are you planning on singing or, more importantly, wearing?" She leaned forward inquisitively, searching his face for any hints.

"That's for me to know, and you to find out after the first round," he responded with a smirk. If he was forced to do this, he was going to at least have a little fun with it.

"Aw no fair," she pouted, "I should have been more specific with my request; I could've watched you perform country music dressed as a mermaid."

"Alright, you got to see me flustered and embarrassed," he responded, laughing, "now shoo I need to call the host and see if they'll let me into the competition next month. Technically you're supposed to apply a year before, but I think they'll make an exception for the King of the Underworld. I can't believe this is actually happening; it still feels like a fever dream."

"I'm going, I'm going," she responded, getting up and grabbing her purse. Just before she left, she grinned and said, "there better be leather involved, or I'll riot." With a final wink, she slipped out the door into the crisp underworld air.

Hades could not believe he was actually doing this. He pulled out with his phone with a grimace and dialed the number on the website. The producer could not be more excited; they literally squealed when they heard his voice. After getting the basics of the show explained, they set up a meeting for him to get measured tomorrow. The costume designer was not happy that they had under a month, but after hearing their client was the actual god of wealth, they quickly agreed. They asked him if he had a costume design in mind, and he grinned to himself, knowing exactly what he was going to wear. It might be a little obvious, but he wasn't expecting to make it past the first round anyway. If he was going to mortify himself on stage, he might as well do it in style.

Now he just had to choose a song. It was going to be from his favorite playlist, he didn't have time to learn a new song; however, he also had to consider the fact that it would be circulating the internet for the next millennia. Oh gods, he can see the MuseTube edits now, but, on the bright side, maybe making a fool of himself will make him more approachable. His therapist would be so proud of him for being optimistic. As he scrolled through his playlist, he grinned as he landed on the perfect song for his debut. Minthe was going to be so pissed at him. This song had always reminded him of her in the best and worst of ways.