SIX the Musical Genderbent Lyrics

Aidan of Cleves Introduction

[CATHAN OF ARAGON]
The time has come for you to select your groom, your highness!

[KATHAN HOWARD]
May we present Christen of Denmark?

Parr goes up on stage to represent Christen. He's in front the three boxes, him standing in the middle one

[JOHN SEYMOUR]
Looking for mates, dates, and a British monarch whom to secure the line of succession, winky-face.

Parr steps over to the right box, where the box lights up red and a sound effect of a thumbs down is played

[AIDEN BOLEYN]
Nein?
Well, never mind, he already made a match with the Duchess of Milan anyhow!

[AIDAN OF CLEVES]
Okay, next!

Parr steps down

[AIDEN BOLEYN]
Your highness, may we present Anthony of Cleves?

This time, Howard steps up to represent Anthony of Cleves. It is the same setup

[CATHAN PARR]
Just a German guy trying to live the English dream. Hashtag no Catholics, hashtag big dowry

Howard steps over to the right box, where the box lights up red and a sound effect of a thumbs down is played yet again

[CATHAN PARR]
Nein?
*mumbles something* (Can someone tell me what Parr said here?)

[CATHAN OF ARAGON]
Okay! Who's next?

Howard steps down

They all chatter in a frantic matter. Then, Aidan of Cleves steps up with the same setup

[KATHAN HOWARD]
Aidan!

[AIDEN BOLEYN]
Fantastic!

[CATHAN OF ARAGON]
Wunderbar!

[JOHN SEYMOUR]
*says something* (Can someone tell me what Seymour said here?)

[CATHAN OF ARAGON]
Your highness, your highness, your highness! We are honoured to present to you, Aidan of Cleves!

[AIDEN BOLEYN]
The most handsome man in all of the Holy Roman Empire!

[CATHAN PARR]
And let me assure you, Herr Holbein has certainly done him justice.

This time, the box to the left of Aidan lights up green and a thumbs up sound effect is played

[CATHAN OF ARAGON]
Ah, the good! And may I think we can say with some certaincy you will be happily married for many years to come!

[KATHAN HOWARD]
Ah! I can see it now! Henrietta VIII and her famous four husbands

[JOHN SEYMOUR]
Oh, no need to thank us, the pleasure has been ours—

[KINGS]
In the Haus of Holbein!

The guys, besides Aidan of Cleves begin to exist. Cathan Parr stays behind after the music is finished to say a line

[CATHAN PARR]
The Haus of Holbein

Parr then exists as well. A sad piano melody plays in the background, with the only light on stage being shined down on Cleves

[AIDAN OF CLEVES]
Well, I guess you already know what happened next. How I came to England, hopeful, summoned after the queen saw my portrait. And how I, with my meager looks the way they are, didn't live up to her expectations.

I mean, It's the usual story, isn't it? The savvy educated young prince deemed repulsive by the wheezing, wrinkled, ulcer-riddled man twenty-four years his senior!

Rejection, rejection from a queen! How can anyone overcome the fate as devastating than being forced to move into a resplendent palace in Richmond with more money that I could ever spend in a lifetime?! And not a single women around to tell me what to do with it.

I mean seriously, just...
Tragic

The lights light up to reveal the other queen behind her, in their normal attire and without a German accent