issues ☆ Outer Banks // JJ

I - Hurricane

'Cause right now I see all these people that love me
But I still feel alone'

Best Friend - Rex Orange County

☆☆☆☆

Life could feel and be like a hurricane sometimes, the problem would start small then grow and end up ripping through your house or in this case life like no one would see it coming and that's what life felt like all the time for me. 

Boarding school was the perfect example, it at 1st was a small idea in the back of my mother's head to get her daughter away from the bad crowd that she'd tried so hard to get her away from and it went from a small idea to a hurricane when I was packing my bags and turning my pogue life into the one I dreamt about having, a kook one and I didn't dream it, it was a nightmare. 

I wasn't exactly kicking and screaming to not go to boarding school, it was meant to be a year only, that was the agreement, a year at boarding school to help my college grades and then I  could go back to pogue life with no questions. 

it was supposed to straighten me out and make me into the delightful young lady of my mothers dream's like my sister but it really turned me into a party girl with a minor substance abuse problem, something I never dared to admit among the kooks of boarding school life but something I knew the pogues wouldn't mind. I went to boarding school damaged but I always knew I would come back even more broken then before.

Hurricane Agatha was like boarding school, the wind cascading into a eye, the middle felt like me packing up and leaving and the debris that was collected among was like my life at boarding school, the picked up parts of roofs was the line of hookups that happened and the movement of the tides was like all the drugs that I may or may not have experimented with to forget all the hookups and parties that I don't remember all to well. The mess left which would destroy people's lives and could change them forever was my life back in the obx, the fallen trees was the left behind pogues and figure eight untouched was like my parents who didn't seem to care much for me when I got there, there was the occasional phone call or the Christmas and birthday present which didn't arrive till months after but I always hope that they meant well. 

the 4 walls of my bedroom however seemed nothing like the wall of my boarding room. My room had personality, it had a purpose. the boarding room was small and the walls were lined with shelves filled with books I touched maybe once or twice for an assignment which I  probably wrote while hung over or high. the room at home felt like home but it was fours walls that I  had spent time making her own but not in as true home was in the château and waking up on the brown stained couch that even though it has springs popping out of the top and the couch cushions were lumpy, days after coming home and surprising my friends, felt like I had never left. 

the sound of doors opening and the flicking of light switches which amounted to nothing but darkness, my clapped eyes open as I saw the long brown haired boy walk past me.

'morning shortie' he spoke, ruffling the top of my head with his hand.

'you call me that again and i'll make sure you wont live until the next hurricane' I protested in annoyance, I liked to think of myself as petite not short. 

he chuckled as he walked closer to the door slapping to back of the blonde boy who was laid on the pull out

'Yo, JJ, you been outside?' he questioned pushing the door with his foot. 

'I have polio, bro, i cant walk' classic jj, a weird dark humour remark. 

I came to my  feet following the boy outside, to see the werckage of Miss hurricane agatha.