Tainted Me

Chapter 15: You Get What You Give

"I'm telling you, he'll shit his pants."

"I will not!"

"Yeah, you fucking will."

"Stop it, you'll make the baby cry."

"I'm not a baby! I'm a fucking adult."

"Aw, look at that. The little shit swears now."

"That's hella cute."

"Fuck you, assholes."

We all burst out laughing at Frisco's pouting baby face on the screen. Oz and Connie grinned, while Kurt was clutching his stomach as he continued to laugh.

Since neither of us went home for Thanksgiving anymore, the crew made it our new tradition to video call before dinner. It was the only time we could catch up with each other's busy lives.

My laptop was propped on my desk, while I lounged comfortably on my chair. I had a grin on my face as I watched some of my favorite people on earth act like little shits through the screen.

"Don't let Lilian see that face or she might realize her boyfriend's a swearing toddler," Connie said.

Almost instantly, Frisco blinked and recollected himself. "Is she there?"

Connie grinned. "No, she's at the library."

I still couldn't believe Frisco had a living and breathing girlfriend. I mean, it only took him about two years to finally make a move on her. I honestly thought he wouldn't grow balls big enough to ask her out.

But to his defense, that long-distance shit was hard.

"Am I the only one still living the bachelor life?" Kurt asked, looking smug. "Dayum, last one standing."

"Wait, what?" Connie demanded, sitting straight and looking at the camera. "Alfie has a girlfriend?"

"Technically, she's not my girlfriend yet," I replied, scratching the side of my head. "We're still at the dating stage."

"He's wooing her," Oz added.

There were collective gasps and scoffs.

Damn it, Oz. Thanks a fucking lot.

I told him that in complete confidence, asking for goddamn advice because I knew jackshit about pleasing girls outside the bedroom.

Frisco was the first one to laugh. "Did Arisa tell you to do that?"

I didn't answer and just stared at him.

"She has you by the fucking balls, man," Kurt commented, looking at me like I'd grown three penises on my forehead and he didn't know whether to laugh or be disgusted.

"Don't I know it?" I muttered.

"Holy shit, I wanna meet this girl," Connie declared, sounding awe-struck.

"You met her in passing last year at the hospital," I reminded her, referring to that time when she and Oz visited me in Boston when I got into a car accident. Arisa was on her way out just when Oz and Connie arrived.

"That was her?"

"Yeah." I paused, as I remembered something. "Ah, she's also that hacker who helped you out a few years ago. She won't tell me with what, though."

Connie frowned. "What? But that was Frisco's friend from San Francisco."

"Remember," Frisco started, "I told you I had to track her down? She wasn't in California that time. She was in Massachusetts."