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Chapter 7

Steven's heart jumped into his throat as he quickly shoved his sleeves down. "O-oh Amethyst! I just, uh, I was playing with Lion see, and uh, he was really excited to see me, h-he didn't mean to obviously ahaha..." 

"Steven... don't lie to me. I know Lion wouldn't do that, accident or not. What actually happened? I won't freak out." Amethyst said with a hint of sadness and worry. She came and sat next to him on the bed. Steven flinched back a bit.

"N-no, really! I wouldn't lie to you Amethyst!" He couldn't think of a better story to tell whilst on the spot like this. 'Gosh Steven, you're literally lying to Amethyst right to her face...I'm such an awful friend...' Steven refused to look Amethyst in eyes and just looked down at his knees.

Amethyst suddenly lurched forward and grabbed one of his arms. He grabbed his arm back and threw himself backwards. "Amethyst, what the hell?!" He growled.

"I'm not stupid Steven! You don't think in all my time on Earth I haven't seen this before?!" 

Steven quickly jumped up and ran towards the door but a hand suddenly yanked him back and shoved him onto the bed. Amethyst stood over him as he pulled his legs into his chest and put his hands over his face. Amethyst's face softened. 

"Look, Steven..." She sat next to him and put an arm round him. "I'm not mad. Just please don't lie to me."

"It's nothing! Really! Please just drop it!" Steven said, his voice muffled through his hands. 

"Steven this isn't nothing! It's serious okay! How long has this been going on?" Amethyst sounded really upset and Steven couldn't stand it. 

"I said DROP IT!!" He yelled and his body glowed pink. Amethyst quickly jumped up and moved back a few feet. 

'No...nonono it's been so long! Not again no please I thought I was past this!' He started breathing heavily, thoughts rushing through his mind. Suddenly he felt a massive thud in his chest, followed by pain. He clutched his chest with his hand, a pained expression on his face. "Agh!!"

"S-Steven! Are you okay?!" Amethyst rushed over to him.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!!" He yelled, curling into a ball. He was struggling to catch his breath and his heart was pounding. 'And this now, too?! What the fuck is wrong with me?!' He sprung up and started pacing the room whilst hyperventilating. Everything was spinning around him.

Amethyst ignored his words and went over and forced him into a hug. Steven thrashed around yelling for a couple of minutes, before finally collapsing into her arms crying. They sat on the floor for several minutes as Amethyst cradled a broken Steven until he finally somewhat calmed down and stopped glowing pink.

"I don't know what's wrong with me, Amethyst!" He wiped at his eyes with his sleeve. "This has been happening a lot recently, I don't know what it is but it's so scary and I hate it, and now I'm glowing pink again apparently, I hate this! Hurting myself was the only way I could somewhat ease it..." He looked down at the floor, afraid of what Amethyst was going to do now she knew all this.

"Steven... You're having panic attacks. I had a friend once that used to experience them. They make you feel like you're dying almost. When did you first experience this?" 

"When I was at College, just after I talked to you guys on the phone."

"Was that the first time you hurt yourself too?"

"No. That was yesterday..." Steven felt so ashamed of himself. 

"Oh, Steven... Why didn't you talk to one of us?"

"Because I didn't want you guys to worry about me! I hate it when people do that, I don't need any fucking sympathy or whatever! I'm fine...I'm fine..." Steven pulled down his sleeves over his hands and buried his face in his arms.

"Steven, I'm sorry but this isn't fine. Look, I won't tell the others if you A. Promise to not hurt yourself again and B. Call your therapist up tomorrow. I can't just pretend this hasn't happened." Amethyst crossed her arms.

"I...Fine. I'll call my therapist tomorrow..."

"And?"

"And...I won't hurt myself again." Steven didn't quite believe himself on that one but he'd say it anyway for Amethyst's sake... and because he didn't want anyone else to find out.

"Good. Shall we maybe watch a movie together? I feel like that would be good idea right now." Amethyst gave him a warm smile. Steven awkwardly smiled back.

"Um...yeah. Sure." Steven went and got comfy on his bed as Amethyst set up the DVD player. He sadly sighed and discreetly scratched at his arm over his sleeve.