Meet Me When I'm Asleep

Chapter 48 - Monsters

Jennie's POV

I could feel the anger raging inside of me. Kai was just standing there like the cold and heartless person that he had become. His gaze bore deep into my eyes with no sign of remorse.

"You don't mean that right ?" I stutter. He looked like villain who had finally accomplished what he came out here for. I know Kai, he wont do this, Kai was a different story. No matter how angry and bitter I knew he was, I didn't think it would boil to this point.

Kai pulls my hand and tries to get me to stand still. "None of this would have happened if you just kept your promise of loving me for the rest of your life. You know that."

"None of this would have happened as well if you hadn't left me, Kim Jongin!" I retorted, pushing him away from me. "I just want you to fucking leave me alone once and for all!"

I ran out to the parking lot and stood behind one of the pillars as I burst into tears. I just wanted to shout and cry and maybe even throw eggs at Kai's car.

I could hear Kai's footsteps following me. I stood a few feet away from him before he could even try anything.

"Are we just going to keep on talking about the same thing over and over again?" he cries. "What will it take for you to realize that you held our future in your hands but all it took was one mistake to break it?"

"How many times am I going to have to apologize for this until you decide to move on?" I yell. "Did you actually think that doing all of this behind my back was going to fix our relationship?"

"Look, I knew there was no chance of you loving me again," he admits. Instead of anger, his eyes were now filled with tears. "I know it's stupid and selfish, but I wanted to... I just wanted to get back at Lisa."

My jaw drops in frustration. "Lisa? She did not choose for this to happen! Hell, she didn't even know you were my ex-boyfriend until she flew to New York! If you want me to pay for everything, then fine! But don't pick on someone who's innocent!"

Kai sits on the cemented pavement, his arms hanging over his folded knees. "I'm so lost. I'm not happy in New York, Jennie."

"You're not happy because you're heart is filled with bitterness," I mutter, sitting on the ground right across him. "How about Bian? Doesn't she make you happy?"

"She does," he nods, keeping his eyes on the ground.

"Isn't that enough?"

"I don't know..." he shakes his head. "I'm a mess."

"I miss you," I whisper while trying to fight back another set of tears waiting to pour down my cheeks. "I miss the person you used to be. This.... This is not you at all. I feel like I'm talking to a completely different person. I know I've hurt you, but I can't believe you allowed all the bitterness to take over who you really are."

"I don't even remember how it was any more back then..." Kai says, smiling weakly. "How I was. How you were."

"We were happy," I sniffed, looking away from his face. "We had a simple life, we didn't have the world, but we had each other."

"And it still didn't work out," Kai points out.

"Some things aren't meant to work out the way we want it to."

"I don't when it ever will," Kai sighs; looking up at the dark ceiling of the building we were in.

"It will work out when you realize what really matters," I say. "You are an amazing person, Kai. I can still confidently say that I know the real you. You are capable of having the world, and you're already so close! You don't need me. You have a successful career, a bunch of undying supporters, immense and undeniable talent - and hey, you have someone who loves you and you just probably fail to see that because you're too angry."