Inside my mind

not talking anymore

Your pov
It's been nearly 2 weeks and Miles didn't bother to talk to me again. In fact, he doesn't even fucking look at me anymore. I did my normal routine nowadays which is get up, shower, change and go for breakfast.

As usual, miles doesn't look up, and I finish my food before walking out the room and back to my room.

This is when I close and lock the door, and begin to sketch whatever comes to mind. Which is usually the view outside my window, or my life back before this shit hole.

Which honestly in comparison to this, doesn't seem that shit anymore. And that's saying something. But here I am, pencil in hand, focus on the blossom trees outside.

I was so engrossed in sketching I didn't realise someone was knocking on the door until they shouted my name.

I stand in the door way trying to give a shit about what my mom was saying. "Mhm yeah whatever" "Are you even listening?!" She yelled. "NO I'M NOT!" I yelled back, slamming the door in her face.

I don't care how rude that was. I just want to be alone and cry myself to sleep. Oh wait a second... I do that anyway!

Miles'pov
2 weeks. 2 weeks I haven't talked to her. It's probably a huge mistake and she's never going to forgive me but fuck it. I can't be assed to deal with anything right now.

I can't deal with myself let alone someone else's problems let alone someone else's problems about me!

I don't want to do anything. Nothing. And that's what I intend on doing for a long fucking time. Nothing. N.O.T.H.I.N.G!

BECAUSE WHY SHOULD I?! NOBODY CARES WHAT I DO! NOBODY EVER CARES AND NOBODY EVER WILL!

I slam my door shut and flop onto my mattress. I don't know why we stay here. This place is just like a death trap/ depression infestation.

I cry into my pillow. I honestly haven't thought of her for 2 weeks either. Ok that's a lie. She's the only thing I've been thinking about for 2 weeks.

GOD DAMNIT FEELINGS WHY ARE THEY SO BAD AT TIMING SHIT LIKE TIHS!!!

I hate feelings. They just back fire and end up getting you hurt because it doesn't work out the way you fantasied about for weeks.

Nothing works out when you catch feelings for people because they break your heart and play you around like a fucking toy. Then you feel stupid, have a mental breakdown and promise yourself you won't catch feelings again.

And then what do you fucking do?! Catch feelings for another person who will break your heart and the cycle continues!

I get up slowly, and walk into the bathroom. I undress and get into the shower. This way nobody can tell if I've been crying for hours on end or if my face is wet from a shower.

Your pov
I won't say I haven't been thinking of him. But I won't say I have either. Because then it'll give away the game that I really have been thinking about him and that I want him back bit I know he won't take me back so it's best to act like I don't want him back.

Fuck...

I really don't know what to do with myself at this point. I really don't. Do I just go up to him and say hey? What if he hates my guts now? What if he never wants to see me again? What if I need to pack my stuff and leave?!

I hate to admit it. But I 100% still love him. No doubt about it. I do and probably always will. GOD DAMNIT YOU SHITTY FEELINGS!!!

I get up and walk out of my room and walk down the hallway. I recite what I wanted to say in my head when I knock on his door and I'm finally face to face with him again.

But me being my dumbass self walked straight into Miles instead and fell over. "Are you ok?!" He asked holding his hand out. I nod and take his hand, standing up slowly.

When I look into his eyes, everything I was going to say, everything I recited was gone. "Um- it's nice- I like-" I stutter not being able to get the right words out.

"It's nice talking to you again. And see you again as well" he said before walking past me and down into the living room.

God I must've looked like a fool! A complete and utter FOOL. I watch him walk down the hall and then the corner as I realise my heart had sped up quite a bit.

"God damnit. How do you do that to me" I mutter walking after him into the living room.

"I love you too..."