all that matters.

chapter twenty-one

*Bethany*
I collapsed into a chair physically and emotionally exhausted. I pulled my knees onto the chair as well and began to sob. I've had it, with everything. I wanted to freeze everything, to make it stop. I checked my watch. They should be almost here by now. I picked myself up and headed quickly to the bathroom. I was a hot mess. My hair stuck to my blotchy face, dark bags had begun to form under my eyes, and my lips were chapped. I splashed some ice water on my face, put on some concealer and chapstick, forced a smile and left.

"This better be good..." Hamilton grumbled.
"I don't know, you tell me?" I retorted cocking my head to the body on the floor. "2 dead bodies and an agent missing sounds about as good as it gets." I said lacing my voice with ice and hostility.
"Who?" Rossi asked.
"Well let's see. The BAU is now down to three agents and a technical analyst. That's me, you, Hotch, and Garcia." I fumed sarcastically. I know it's unfair, and it's not his fault.

"One last question-"
"Shoot."
"What was Reid doing at a bar?"
I frowned, thinking about how I should explain. I pursed my lips, it wouldn't matter now if I told them.

"It's easier if I tell it from the beginning. Once upon a time, I had a thing for Daniel Axen. We became intimate, he became abusive. When he showed up again, he held a gun to my side and told me I was going to do whatever he wanted. He showed up in my room at seven, I lied and told Spencer I needed some alone time. Well he checked in on me a half hour later and saw me-"

His brown eyes stared at me intently, still. I laughed because I was sleep deprived, and he smiled. I hate him for making me laugh accidentally when I'm supposed to be serious. I struggled to put straight face back on.

"Kissing him, and he came here. I left shortly after Spencer did, I would've left right away but you know problems. I showed up here, he went back inside for a moment, there was gunshots fired and when I went inside this is what I found." I rushed.

He stared at me for a few seconds before nodding.

"No lectures, scoldings?" I pipers, suddenly confused.
"Of course we're not mad, there's literally nothing you could've done to prevent this."
I shrugged thinking about this.

"So... What are we waiting for? Let's go catch a bastard."