Unexpeted

Ch. 23

Eliana's pov

*3 weeks later*

Honestly, not much has happened in the past 3 weeks. It's been really unproductive and I mean that in a good way. I haven't had to go to therapy or the psychiatrist in 3 weeks. Mostly because I think my moms been so busy with work she's forgotten. Which totally works for me. She can live in the studio for all I care. The less she's here and less I see her or have to interact with her, the better.

However, I'm getting the vibe this isn't exactly accidental. I guess that my mom and Victoria took the advice of not argue where I can hear because I didn't hear them argue. But when they are in the same room together no eye contact is made, no conversation is made, and the tension is so thick.

I think they got into an argument so my mom decided to use work to distract her. Which is perfect to me, but Victoria seems to care a lot more than I do. She seems a bit down and really taking this hard.

I walk downstairs and stop midway as I hear talking between Victoria and my mom, "So you're going to the studio?" Victoria asks quietly.

"That's what I said."

"And I'm going to babysit Eliana for the 3rd week in a row?" She asks.

"I can take her with me if you don't want to be a parental figure to her."

"That's not what I said at all, I just think that Eliana needs to spend a little time with you. She hasn't seen you in 3 weeks and hasn't even been to Jordyn or the psychiatrist in 3 weeks. I can't imagine she's doing well right now and it's like you don't even care. If you don't want to care about me, fine. Break up with me if you want. But you shouldn't take what happened between us, out on her too. Like I'm done. I'm done with this. If this is how you want to continue to do things then I'm leaving."

Well shit, what the hell happened that caused Victoria to literally throw in the towel? I didn't think it was that serious. But clearly I was wrong.

"Well, I'm not forcing you to stay. If you want to leave then leave." My mom says before walking out the front door.

I tip toe quietly to my bedroom and quietly close the door behind me before sitting at my desk and grabbing a pen him sharper and scissors. I might as well go ahead and prepare for this one, because it's going to be ugly.

I take the cap off the sharpener and shove the scissors into the plastic and begin to cut away at the plastic. I'm aware I could use a screw driver but I don't have one, my mom doesn't have one. So I have learned to spend an hour cutting away at plastic to get blades is the only way to do this.

I hear and light knock on the door and I shove the pencil sharper into my pocket and hide my scissors before grabbing a pencil and paper. I need to make it look like I'm doing something, or about to at least.

"Yeah?" I ask.

I hear my bedroom door open and Victoria stands beside my desk. I just begin to color the inside of the lines of notebook paper, "What are you up to?" She asks.

"I'm going to color this whole paper with pencil." I lie.

I see her give a small nod, "Can you maybe call one of your aunts or grandparents?" She asks.

"Aunt Dallas is in Texas, Aunt Madison is also in Texas. My grandparents are on some vacation in Arizona. Trust me, I'm upset too. I wanted to go to Arizona." I say.

"How about Matthew or Sirah?" She asks.

"I guess." I say.

I get up and walk to my nightstand and grab my phone. I go to my contacts and call Matthew and put him on speaker, "Hey kiddo." He says.

"Are you busy?" I ask.

"No, what's up?" He asks.

The sky.

"Can you babysit me? Victoria had something to do and my momssssss I don't know." I say.

"Yeah, I can babysit you. When do I need to be there?" I ask.

"Now I guess." I say.

"Alright, I'm on my way." He says.

"Ok." I hang up.

I put my phone back on the nightstand and I walk to my dear and pick my pencil up again, "You didn't hear anything this morning did you?" She asks.

"No why?" I ask.

"I could've swore I heard you on the stairs this morning."

"No, I dragged my chair across my room. Maybe you heard that, but I didn't go downstairs." I say.

"Do you want breakfast?" She asks.

"Not even a little."

"You need to eat, it's not good to skip breakfast." She says.

"Well, I'm still alive so clearly it hasn't done that much damage."

I don't even understand what it is about breakfast that's so important. Like I still function without it so clearly it isn't that important. If you can function the same without it, why eat it?

I hear her let out a soft sigh, but she doesn't argue with me. I guess she's done that with my mom enough and isn't in the mood continue. But I understand. All life's sucked out of me when I listen to my mom yell at me, I don't even fight back.

In the corner of my eye I see Victoria walk out of my room and I listen to her footsteps fade downstairs. I look back at my bedroom door and see it closed and I pull the pencil sharpener out of my pocket.

You know if people would stop taking my blades, I wouldn't have to keep doing this. Why take my blades away if your stupid enough to fall for 'I need a pencil sharpener, I lost my other one' every time? You'd think my mom would catch on after a while, but nope. She hasn't. And even if she does, it's fine. I'll just take the small blades out of my razors. Not even a big deal. It just blows my mind she really hasn't caught onto this yet.

But then again with the lack of attention and focus she puts on me, I shouldn't be that surprised. She'll get whatever if it leads to me shutting up and leaving her alone. I don't think she really pays that much attention to what she buys me. Clearly not enough to realize what she's buying me has the exact item she continues to take away from me. I have to laugh honestly.

With a lot of work, I get the blade out in a record 45 minutes and throw away the now useless sharpener. I get up from my chair and hide the blade beneath my mattress.

I then get back into my bed and grab my phone. I really should brace myself for the next few days. With Victoria actually choosing to leave, it'll be hell for me. It always is after my moms break ups. It's as if she blames me for them. It's not my fault, it's hers. They all end because of her. But you know she'll blame me for everything she can, she has for my entire life's existence.

"Well if all goes wrong, at least I've got fully refilled medication." I mutter to myself.

Yes, look at me strategizing and getting plans together. Jordyn would be proud of my preparation, even if it's for the exact reason I go to her. She likes to see me think ahead and prepare for things.

But how will I prepare for things now? By going to sleep and pretending I have not an idea of anything happening.