"I don't know what I want," I said, hating that my voice cracked. "I know it wasn't… this. And I'm stuck on this stupid ship with you. We're in one of the most beautiful places on the planet and I'm crying. I just want space. I want- fuck. I don't want to share you. I don't want you to be someone's baby daddy. I want you all to myself. I want you to be my kids' dad. I never expected that this is something I would have to deal with."
Owen sat on the bed, watching me carefully. He started to reach his hand out to me, but pulled it back. I could tell he was yearning to reach out and touch me, but I was glad he didn't. "I'm sorry that this happened. It's no one's fault, but I'm not going to leave her to be a single mom. That's my kid, too. I didn't expect this either. Any of this. I'm not ready to be someone's dad! Shit just happens sometimes, and we have to make the best of it. That's what it is."
"That's not all of it though. This is the fairy tale I was living in disintegrating in front of me-"
"Life is not a fairy tale," he interrupted. "It never will be. I wish it was-"
"Im going to call my brother," I mumbled, moving closer to my phone, but Owen jumped in front of me.
"Why? So he can kill me?"
I scoffed. "No, because he's my big brother and I trust his insight. I'm not that mad," I whispered. "I wouldn't have him kill you. I'm just… processing."
"That's what I'm trying to do, too. I don't know the answers. Talk to me. We can work through it together."
I stared into his eyes as tears poured down my face. Half of me wanted to rush into the comfort of his arms and have him tell me everything would be okay. The other half told me to get away. "I don't know what to do," I sobbed. "Please, don't hold it against me but I need to call my brother right now."
"Okay," he said. "That's okay. I understand." He handed my phone to me but he looked so hurt.
It was so impossible. I couldn't stand to see the look on his face, and even though my body ached to hug him, I couldn't. My feet carried me to the bathroom while I dialed the phone, but I collapsed against the cabinets when Elijah picked up.
"Hello?" He said.
"Bubby," I whimpered. I buried my face in my elbow so I couldn't see.
"What is it? What happened?" he asked.
"I don't know what to do."
"Well tell me what happened. Mateo, get everybody out," he barked to someone in the background. "Now."
I took a deep breath and heaved it out, trying to hold myself together. "Some girl called him. She said that she's pregnant."
"Oh shit. It's his baby?"
"Yes. I mean, I guess so. He was with her two months ago."
"Well, it'll be okay. There's custody agreements and stuff. It doesn't have to-"
"No. I waited. And he hooked up with some random girl named Jess and now he's gonna be some womans baby daddy."
"Um…" Elijah made uncomfortable noises. "I really don't know what to tell you here, Sis. It doesn't sound… as serious… as you seem to feel like it is."
"He's supposed to be mine. What if you married Ava and found out afterwards that she was pregnant with someone else's baby?"
I heard him snarl through the phone. "Don't. That is not the same."
"How isn't it? You'd have to share her with someone else, to know someone else had had his hands on her body."
"I can't talk about this with you. I've had sex with other people. I know I'm going to marry this girl, and I still did it. He had no idea two months ago he was going to marry you."
"Well maybe you shouldn't."
He chuckled. "You think I should be celibate for the next four years?"
"Maybe you should. That way you'll know that Ava won't have to feel this way. I'm hurt," I complained. "and I'm angry. And he looked so heartbroken and I just walked away." Fresh tears rained down my cheeks as I realized my husband and I needed each other in that moment, and I turned away to go to my family. "What do I do?"
"Why the fuck are you asking me?" Elijah said. "Work it out with him. You're married to him, not me. If you want me to have someone beat him up, tell me. I can't help you otherwise. Enjoy your honeymoon. You don't have to deal with any evil women named Jess until you get back."
I sighed. "So I have to say I'm sorry?"
"You probably should. I love you. Go enjoy your vacation with your new husband. Maybe you can celebrate him becoming a father. Fuck it, make him another baby."
"Shut up!" I shouted, unable to hold in the laughter.
"There. I fixed it. Now hurry and talk to him before you get sad again." He hung up and I stared at my phone for a moment.
I stood slowly, wiping my face, before I walked to where Owen was sitting on the bed. I bowled him over, rolling him into the bed with me so we were on our sides looking at each other. "I'm sorry," I said. "I shouldn't have been so mean."
“Oh, sweetheart. I’m not mad at you. I hate to think that I hurt you. I didn’t mean to. We can work through this."
I breathed in the salty ocean smell on his skin, allowing myself to be calmed by his closeness.
"It's not the ideal way to start our marriage, but I believe we can do this. We just have to try."
I wasn't entirely sure what had upset me the most. I felt betrayed and cheated, but Elijah had said it wasn't so serious. Was I overreacting? Both Elijah and Owen had gotten at least one thing right, he didn't even know me two months ago. He couldn't have possibly predicted us getting married, nor could he have known the girl was going to get pregnant.
"Will you show me what she looks like?" I whispered after a long period of silence.
Owen considered that for a moment, seeming to think maybe it wasn't the best idea, but eventually he conceded. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and held it up above us where I could see. I had expected him to show me her profile on Facebook, but when he opened the Tinder app, I shoved him away from me.
Fresh pain sparked through me like an explosion that started in my chest. "You met her on Tinder?"
YOU ARE READING
Accepting Owen (Emilia's Perspective)
RomansaConnected to Marriage Before Graduation. This one is chronologically first, but is being written second. Marriage Before Graduation is already completed. ~ Emilia is strong, confident, and stands up for what she believes in. Her entire life she's k...