Accepting Owen (Emilia's Perspective)

Chapter Twenty-Four

Elijah kept his arm around my shoulders while we stood at the bar. It was a bar under his command, but he felt better keeping me close. We ordered our drinks and went upstairs to a table far in the back.

"Do you like being here, in Chicago?" I asked him when we sat down.

"I love it. The city is so forward thinking. There's so much beautiful art everywhere. I'll have to take you through some of the districts while you're here."

"Do you feel powerful? I worry about your head getting so big that it explodes."

He chuckled. "Sometimes I feel powerful. Right now I do. Look at them," he said as he leaned forward to look down, through the railing, at the dancefloor. "The fun they're having, I provide it. It's a safe place for these women to enjoy themselves because there are eyes everywhere, all the time. Where the women go, the men follow. So, it's perfect."

"Have you beaten anybody up lately?"

He lifted his shirt and showed me a bruise on his ribs. "I only train now. That's from a kick during some kickboxing classes."

I worried about him not fighting. He tended to get more emotional and feel trapped in his head when he didn't. Fighting was the only release he knew. "Why did he kick you so hard? And why aren't you fighting anymore? You know how you get-"

"Well, they invented these things called guns awhile back," he said sarcastically. "They're pretty intimidating, so I haven't been working with my hands as much."

"Jesus. I shouldn't have asked. Things are still rough out here?" He'd expressed having some trouble, but last I heard things were improving.

"Some of the families are still testing me for weaknesses. They think that I shouldn't take over for Dad. Once I prove myself here, I'm going to get a couple other spots."

"Do you feel like everyone is against you?" I watched a couple dancing closely to the music that was pumping through speakers overhead.

"No, I have some really good guys on my team. Mateo has been with me since day one. He's basically my best friend. It will be nice when Owen joins me. Do you think he'll do well?" Elijah asked, leaning back in his seat to look over at me.

I turned to look in his eyes. "He's strong, but he's never been broken down like that. I don't want you to be too hard on him. I don't think he needs to be broken to be able to fight for you."

"You think he could be that loyal organically? You think he could kill somebody for me?" Elijah peered at me as the room darkened and the song changed.

"His mind is so strong, and he wants to do this. It's in his family. I'm sure he knows what's expected of him." Owen's assimilation to the 'family business' might be slow, but it was going to be very important. He was taking on the legacy of his father, and like his grandfather, the legacy he would pass on to our future children.

"Okay. I'll try for you. Hey, I know you don't want to talk about this right now, but what are you thinking about becoming a stepmom?"

I sighed, pushing back in my seat. "I'm terrified. I don't know why I've been so upset about it. It just hit me out of nowhere. I'm scared to share him with someone. Im afraid that the connection between them will be more than what he and I have, and he'll choose her over me."

"I'd kill him," Elijah said in a low voice, as the lights swung up to illuminate half of his face in purple. Despite the odd color, I could tell he was tense, before the light swept down to the dancefloor again. 

"I know, but I don't think that's right either. He's just trying to be a good person. Logically, I know that. My anxiety doesn't use logic though. So I don't know what to do about it. He wants his child to have a father. That's something a good person would do. So I don't know why it bothers me."

"It doesn't fit into your plan. The life you imagined for yourself all this time isn't exactly what you're getting. You're struggling with the same thing I am. You expected to be the only woman having his kids, but that's not what's happening. It's tough to accept when reality doesnt meet your expectations."

"So he feels how we're worried Ava will feel," I mumbled. "Do you really think so?"

"I have no idea how he feels. He grew up different from us."

"The way his mind works is so... clear," I said, finishing my brother's thought. "He looks at facts and makes judgements based on that instead of emotions. He doesn't even get upset, really. I mean, he snapped at me for a second but he just told me he wasn't going to put up with my shit." I chuckled, but Elijah's expression didn't change from the solemn one he'd been showing me.

"Did you ask him how he feels?"

"Well... No," I admitted. Shit, how did I not think of that? It sounded like the simplest idea ever.

"Maybe you should."

I sighed at my phone. I was afraid to reach out in case I bothered him. If he were with me, he probably would've scolded me for feeling that way. "He might be with her right now."

"With who?"

"With Jess. He was anxious to talk to her about everything." I tried to ignore the prickle of jealousy on the back of my shoulders.

"What do you think will happen?" Elijah asked pensively.

"Right now it's super early. Anything could happen. Who even knows if the kid is actually Owen's. They met on Tinder. He said he knew he was going to talk to his parents about getting married, so he wanted one last casual thing." I failed to contain an eye-roll.

"It's so weird to think of you as a stepmom. That's going to be really tough on your... personality, being unable to control anything and having to go along with whatever Jess says as the mom."

I sighed. "Yes, that will definitely kill the control freak in me." I spun my phone in my fingers. "I'm just going to text him."