03 Good Morning*

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I'm a big boy! No way I'm calling the Alpha tonight!

With this thought, I close my eyes.

"Bwayden, Help!" Bella's voice echoes through my mind.

"You're supposed to be strong! You let my little girl die!" Daddy's adds.

"I told you to run.. why didn't you protect her!?" Momma asks.

"I'm scawed!" Bella screams so loud I shoot up in bed sobbing.

I look around the room panting as the tears stream down. Ms. Jones is soon at my side.

"Shhh... you're okay." She tries to soothe me. I continue to struggle for breath as more water from my eyes soaks my shirt. Looking out the window I can see that it is the middle of the night. When she reaches for me I jump away. "I'll call the Alpha." She says.

"No!" I yell grabbing her arm. "Don't call him."

"He cares for you, pup... he'll want to make sure you are okay." Ms. Jones says looking down on me with pity.

No! He can't see me weak. He can't worry about me. Ari has enough to deal with I can't distract him!

"I'm fine ma'am... please... don't worry Ari... I'll just go back to sleep no problem, see?" I say, throwing myself on the pillow and pulling the covers to my chin. She looks at me doubtfully. "Please?" I beg.

"Fine... but if I have to come back in here I'm calling Alpha Aaron." She says and walks to the door. "Sleep well, pup."

I close my eyes and wait for the footfalls to fade away.

1 Mississippi...
2 Mississippi...
3 Mississippi...
4 Mississippi...
5 Mississippi...
6 Mississippi...
7 Mississippi...
8 Mississippi...
9 Mississippi...
10 Mississippi...

OK!

I jump out of bed. I can't go back to sleep I think pacing the floor. If I sleep I'll dream bad stuff then she'll call Ari. I can't bother him. I already got Bella killed... probably momma too. If I'd been faster getting ready. If I could tie my own shoes. We would have been out earlier and momma would not have been attacked. If momma wasn't attacked I wouldn't have ran to Daddy's office and Bella would be alive. I killed them. I won't let myself distract Ari and get him killed too. I won't do it!

What to do? It's still dark outside... I could explore the house... I never cleaned up the fort in Ari's office... if I clean up he will have less to worry about tomorrow. Yes! That is how I'll help!

I sneak out my door and tiptoe down the stairs creeping along the wall. The entire house is silent and dark as I make my way to the office. As I turn the handle, I realize the door is locked. Now what?... hmmm...

For how expensive this place looks this is a cheap doorknob. I could unlock it with a butter knife... where is the kitchen? I wander around the house until I find it and open drawers until I find a knife. Quickly and quietly I go back to the office and turn the lock. Daddy always said, "locks are to keep honest people honest." I'm not being dishonest but I think it means if someone wants in they will get in lock or no.... I guess it applies in that way. Now to clean up!

I put the cushions back on the couch, stack my books up, and fold the blanket. "Yaaaaawwwwnnn." I am tired... No! Can't sleep!... but maybe I could just rest a bit? You know until Ari needs to work. Yeah... just a little "yaawwwnnnn." Rest...

SLAM!

"GGGGRRRRRRR!"

CRASH!

I sit up straight as loud noises and growls fill the house. What's going on?

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