maybank oneshots

AVERAGE

average
w/c: 1.8k
description: the reader just want to be the main character in her own life.
warnings: jj x reader, super angsty but gets fluffy at the end, implications of suicide
a/n: i genuinely have no idea what this is. i kind of just wrote it with no ending or story line in my head so if nothing matches up, that is why 🦋🧚‍♂️🤪✨

your hair fell limp against your broad shoulders, the mirror broadcasting the deep circles under your eyes from the sleep you had been lacking. your eyes looked droopy and red-rimmed, while your cheeks were puffy and flush.
you were average.
you got average grades, you had an average family, you looked average and you acted average.
your entire life, jealousy would steam through your veins as you watched the separate groups of pogues and kooks follow along their own adventures, living a life written like a indie 'coming of age' movie.
technically, you lived on the cut so you were classified as a pogue. your house wasn't a minuscule shack on the outskirts of the beach and it wasn't a beautifully built chateau. it was a regular, medium sized three bedroomed house.
exclaims of delirium and animation could be heard from your bedroom due to the slightly cracked open window. you peeked out and saw the thunder crash to the grassy floor outside, rain tumbling furiously from the gloomy, grey sky.
yet, not only did your eyes watch the stormy weather, they caught the culprits for the yells of thrill and exhilaration. a group of pogues, who you recognised to be kiara, john b and jj, laid on their backs staring up at the pelts of water smacking against their soaked bodies.
your eyes bulged from their sockets, seeing them live in their own story, not a care in the world.
kiara was definitely not average.
the girl wore a tie dye jumper with her regular denim shorts, clad with a pair of yellow vans. her hair was natural and curly, droplets of water being squeezed out from her ringlets with her fist.
her smile beamed up to the dark abyss above her, eyes shining towards the boys amongst her.
who wouldn't feel envy and desire from watching the seemingly perfect teenager? - obviously she was the main character in her life.
john b was definitely not average. he wore an unbuttoned striped shirt matched with some jean shorts, probably cut by himself since the jagged edges seemed wispy and uneven.
his freckles seemed so prominent on his tan, clear skin, his brown mess of hair softly touching his long eyelashes which were laid against his wet cheek, his hazel eyes clenched shut to take in the artic temperatures and booms that the sky yelled out to the group.
pope was definitely not average. the boy laid peacefully on the soil, a tranquil expression crossing his spaced out face. his brown eyes stared upwards, his mouth staying shut and silence. although he was shy and quiet, he was smart and funny. there was not a doubt that pope heyward wasn't an important role in the makeshift gang the four had pulled together. the green tone of his shirt complimented his dark skin angelically, showcasing the true beauty the young genius was.
lastly, the boy that was sat upright, rather than laid on his back like the rest of his boisterous, popular friends. JJ's blonde hair sat unkempt, tousled and slovenly on top of his tilted head. his bright blue eyes stared daggers into the soggy leaves scattered on the ground below them, mind clearly suffocated with thoughts and wonders.
the pogues.
although they liked to believe they were different and quirky, they were just like the rest of them. every single person on this island had a role, especially them.
you could not talk to a single person that resided on outer banks who had never heard of the young troublemakers.
their laughs filled your ears as tears spilled from your cloudy eyes, desolation erupting inside of you.
you didn't belong here. you had no friends that you could lay under the pouring rain with. you had no friends that you could design makeshift tattoos for each other.
if somebody spoke your name, no heads would be turned, no eyes would widen in recollection of the teenage pogue called y/n y/l/n.
you were just an extra in the background of their lives. if you were gone, who would notice?
if kiara didn't turn up for just one day, pope would notice first, due to his overwhelming crush on the perfect girl. he would probably panic and search for her.
she could simple have just decided not to go that day, and was sat on her fancy, silk bedding in her expensive mansion on figure eight without a care in the world. not knowing that she had three friends that would give up the world to look for her. after all, she was the one who supplied the food and alcohol. what would they do without her?
if john b didn't turn up for just one day, kiara would notice before anyone, but jj and pope would realise not long after. they always met at the chateau, without john b they'd have no meeting point. john b was almost the glue to their group, considering it was also his boat that they took out on the marsh every bright, sunny day in outerbanks.
if pope didn't turn up for just one day, jj would notice immediately, wondering where the boy that put up with his stupidity and half-witted banter was. pope was the teenager that helped settle debates, that sorted out tensions within the group. he was the settler within the pogues, not letting an argument get too far and not letting the pogues get too drunk or high at a boneyard party. he kept his friends in line and without him, they would most definitely be in prison by now.
lastly jj, the wildcard. obviously, he thinks he could go missing without a bat of the eye. in his mind, he makes no difference to the small island that he called home. yet the reputation that he withheld said different, the many police officers who worried about the wellbeing of his home life said different, the fellow surfers who would give a small greeting as they rode the waves together said different. jj maybank could, without question, be one of the most well known islanders here.
if anybody in north Carolina was the main character, it would be him.
turning away from your window, you abruptly pulled the curtains shut, your eyes welling up too much to let yourself watch the buoyant, fortunate group of close friends.
the clogs in your brain whirred, not letting any rational thought push past the wandering ones of despair and self- hatred.
the small voice in the back of your mind urged you to disappear, to leave without a trace. who would notice?
not your mother, she was busy with looking after your younger brother. despite his pogue label, the cocky, lewd kooks his age had reeled him into their disgusting ways and laced him into risky buisness that our mom had to keep a close eye on, worry for her troubling son doubling each day that passed.
not your father, his bosses enjoyed his stress levels rising impossibly high. overworking the man until his schedule was packed to the point that caused his blood levels to rise dangerously. the time spent with his family had lowered throughout the past few months and recently, you couldn't even remember the last time he had said anything to you that wasn't 'not now' or 'maybe later'.
the dreadful tears pooled in your lower eyelid, stains of the wet trails still visible on your pale, tired face.
no turning back.
the raincoat on your back itched from the heavy pressure as continuous pellets of precipitation lathered the 'waterproof' fabric. clearly the low priced clothing item had been cheap for a reason.
the crashing waves of the angered ocean neared, the golden sand weaving its way into the soles of your tarnished, banjaxed shoes. the uncomfortable sensation between your toes was disregarded in your mind, sand covering your now begrimed feet being the least of your worries and your legs mindlessly carried you closer to the dangerous water.
as one foot stepped close enough for the water to just lightly wash over your shoes after it had calmed from the ferocious wave it had previously been.
"stop!" a deep voice called to you, alarm and terror present in the tone of his sudden shout. you sharply turned your head to the mysterious saviour; you had great difficulty recognising him due to the dark glow from the night sky, thick fog surrounding the dreary beach and his voice being changed moderately from the harsh wind and ear-shattering splashes from the thunderous ocean roaring into the sea walls. only the faint glimmer of the crescent moon above you both gave you a hint of brightness.
"why should i?" you whimpered, your voice being swept away with the wind, it carrying any confidence you had away with it. you sounded croaky and broken, the boy infront of you felt his heart break from the spine chilling tone you used.
his feet carried him closer to you, letting your eyes readjust to the new movement and place a name to his face.
jj maybank.
"what are you doing here?" you muttered, your eyes closing tightly as your hair swept backwards violently, having to focus intensely to keep yourself grounded as the strong air tried to push you away.
jj just shook his head, woe and gried swept his usually arrogant and smug features. he just kept his blue eyes on you, watching you vehemently.
"you don't even know who i am." you mumbled again, mainly to yourself. you hoped he hadn't heard you, wishing for him to just turn around and leave so you could carry on your walk into the waves so they could pull you into the tide with them and take you away.
the freezing breeze hit your shivering skin, your teeth chattered slightly as you rubbed your arms to gather any heat you possibly could from yourself.
"you're y/n y/l/n. you sat on the table in front of me last year in math class and any time you got asked a question you would jolt upright and twiddle your hair between your fingers. you used to go on walks along this beach when we were younger if you got stressed or if you felt pressured. i would catch your eyes watching me surf and i would try crazy tricks that i knew i hadn't even learnt yet to impress you but every time i looked back at you, your head had turned at your eyes were focused on something else. i know you, y/n. this isn't you." his voice broke at the end, one solitary tear slipping from his anguish filled eyes.
you didn't hesitate to pull the boy into a tight embrace, not knowing he had ever noticed you the same way you had noticed him.

maybe you weren't average.