MAKOTO . tsukishima kei [✓]

- thirty-six : opinion

* another chapter bc i actually have a lot lined up already *

[ third person ]

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Confident. That's what many people though Makoto was. Her unwavering confidence couldn't be shattered by anything, which made her the most reliable person people knew. If only they knew that she was just as insecure as everyone else.

"I heard Tsukishima-san's dating Makoto-san." A student said as they stood at the bottom of the stairs. Makoto stood at the top, unable to be seen by the two students who talked nearby. "It's a weird pair, right?"

"Well, I mean, they talked like all the time throughout the year." The other student pointed out, recalling how Makoto and Tsukishima were always seen together. "It's not that weird." 

"But still, Makoto-san's so boyish. It's kind of gross." The female student grunted with arms crossed over her chest. "I don't understand why Tsukishima-san would ever date a girl like that."

"Nana-san, their relationship is none of your business." The male muttered with a raised eyebrow. His only friend truly was a bitch when it came to these kinds of things. "Also, lower your voice. I don't think Tsukishima-san would like to hear you bad-mouthing his girlfriend."

She scoffed, "Like I care. The only thing Tsukishima should worry about is getting a new girlfriend who's more feminine. People will think he's gay if he dates Makoto-san any longer." Nana sneered, laughing at her own comment.

The male student sighed heavily, dragging an exasperated hand down his face. "Nana-san, I told you to stop doing that."

"Shut up, Koichi. You're not the boss of me." The female trotted away from Koichi, leaving the male there to sigh to himself.

Makoto descended down the stairs, standing beside Koichi who jumped when he saw her out of the corner of his eyes. "Yo."

Koichi visibly began to sweat, "M-Makoto-san, did..you hear anything?"

Makoto nodded, keeping her eyes trained on the floor instead of Koichi's face. "Everything."

His heart dropped to his ass. He automatically began to bow repeatedly, babbling some nonsense about being sorry for what was said about her and Tsukisima.

"It's fine." Makoto reassured, making the boy stop his bowing. She shrugged, patting him on the shoulder gently. "Thanks for defending me, Koichi-san."

Before Koichi could say anything else, the ravenette bowed and went on her way.

Her bottom lips was caught between her teeth as she got lost her in thoughts.

"The only thing Tsukishima should worry about is getting a new girlfriend who's more feminine."

Recently, she's been hearing a lot of opinions about her relationship with Tsukishima. After Hinata accidentally outed their relationship, students started talking about the two who could no longer ignore others.

"She's too boyish."

"He's too tall for her."

"They look like two boys."

"Maybe if she grew out her hair."

"She looks like a delinquent."

"Is she actually a girl?"

"No make-up? Yikes."

"That's just weird."

Her shoulders slumped as a sigh escaped her lips. She couldn't decipher what the heavy, aching feeling in her chest was. It was uncomfortable, making her feel heavy and dejected. I wanna see Kei.

Unfortunately, the male wasn't at school due to a small family thing that took place in the next town over. He was set to return tomorrow, but it didn't change the fact that Makoto was lonely without him.

Bored and lonely without her boyfriend, she sat at her desk with her head down. Negative thoughts floated around in her mind as she recalled the words from earlier.

What if...Kei also thinks that? No. There's no way...right? But...there's not much of me to be proud of. I look like a boy and I'm not attractive. I...don't know even know why he'd like someone like me.

Makoto slammed her head on the desk, grunting quietly. Students within the classroom glanced at her, wondering if she was alright after that loud, hard hit.

This is a repeat of Kichiro. Makoto thought as she scrunched her face of in distress. Even though this was a repeat of Kichiro, it was twice as worse since she actually liked the person back.

She could vividly remember being laid in bed at 3am every night, trying to figure out why Kichiro would like a girl like her. The older male had provided many reasons why he was in love with her, but she couldn't believe any of them. Beautiful? Affectionate? Perfect? Who are you talking about?

Makoto ran a hand through her hand, tugging at the strands in frustration. It's not like me to be so freaking pathetic.

For a mere moment, she hesitated. Should I be in a relationship with Kei? Do..I deserve to be at his side?

Slamming her head on the table once more, she grunted to herself as she went limp. She didn't even bother to move when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Makoto? Are you okay?" Yamaguchi's voice filled her ears, temporarily blocking out the intrusive thoughts that were stressing her out. "Do you want to talk?"

Makoto lifted her head, meeting Yamaguchi's soft brown eyes that were full of concern. She opened her mouth to say something, but closed her mouth and smiled. "It's nothing. I just miss Kei."

Yamaguchi didn't look all too convinced, but simply smiled, nodding. He reached out, gently patting her head. "He'll be back soon. Don't worry."

Makoto smiled, "Thanks, Yamaguchi."

The male nodded with a grin, returning to his seat as the bell rang to signal classes were beginning again.

The rest of the day, Makoto's head was in the clouds as she internally doubted herself.

It wasn't like her to be so insecure about her appearance or how she was seen by others. Though, things were way different now. Not only did she have to worry about her appearance, she had to worry about Tsukishima's too. If he was ever embarrassed to be seen with a boyish girl like Makoto, she'd feel ashamed of herself.

Kei wouldn't think like that. Would he?

[ a/n : this chapter is a bit shorter than others(?) sorry ;-; i feel like these two also need a bit of sad bc what's a relationship without problems? ]