His Absence 39

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"Stop telling me what should I do,"Star told Anders.

"Star, I'm not. I am just reminding you about us."

"Don't overthink about us because there's no us."

"Star, have you forgotten?"

"About what?"

"Let's get lost once again to be reminded about us," Anders said as he grabbed Star's hand.

"If you're not busy, just go. I have shoots to attend."

"That doesn't matter."

Star walked out. Anders followed her.

"Star, please listen to me."

"Anders..."

"And you're calling me that way now?"

"There's a lot of things that happened. You've changed, I too changed."

"If you think that way, well I don't and will never think that way."

"Do you want me to tell why I'm like this?"

"No need. Just be a star," Anders told her and left.

Star thought Anders will understand her but he did not.

She felt helpless. She went home feeling sick.

As she open the door, Fori was there at the sofa as if waiting for her.

Star ignored Fori.

"Let's talk," Fori told Star.

Star stopped.

"About what?"she asked.

"Don't you miss your family in the Philippines?"

Star didn't reply.

"Now that Mmy is gone. You can go back home, Anders and I talked already."

"You think it's as easy as it sounds? You think I could go back that easy?"

"Mmy loved you so much, she already gave you freedom."

"Fori, if you think I never loved mom that's a big mistake. I never felt I am not free."

"Tante Aurore just called and she asked me to say sorry to you."

"Tante Aurore has been so good, she should not feel sorry to me."

Then someone knocked the door. Fori opened it.

"Anders is here," Fori said.

Star didn't look back but proceeded on her room.

"Anders, Star is like a sister to me, I wish her to be free and happy."

"Thank you for understanding her," Anders replied.

"Your room is still your room, nothing changed, you just go and sleep there, if you need anything just asked our nannies," Fori told him and went upstairs.

Anders sat on the sofa and fell asleep.

Star can't sleep. She went downstairs. She saw Anders.

She had second thought if she will wake him up or not but in the end, she chose to ignore him.

In the morning, Fori bid goodbye to Star and Anders.

"I'm going back to US. I can't be sad forever. I have to move on. I wish you happiness," Fori told Star. "Please take care of her," Fori told Anders and finally left.

"If you're feeling unhappy, that's not wrong, everyone feels the same you do. We are not always happy. At times we feel hurt and sad, but life must go on."

Star looked at Anders.

Anders offered his hand.

"Let's go home."

Star is supposed to go but Anders hugged her back.

"I missed you so much," he told her and tears started to flow.

Star missed Anders too. She missed him so much too but the guilt she's feeling over her mom's death is in her heart that she could not let her heart feel she deserve to be loved.

"Let go of your pain. You speak out," Anders told her.

Then suddenly it rained. Star immediately went out. Anders followed her.

Star cried. Anders heard she's crying so he gave her time to cry.

Star is so sorry and at the same time very angry at Anders because her mom died without being able to  wait for his return.

Star cried and cried. Anders decided to help her.

"No! Let me punish myself for being such a bad daughter to mom. Let me get sick so that I could at least feel lighter."

"Mom won't feel happy if you will do that."

"Happy? Do you know how she waited for you to return? Do you know how many times she usually ask for you? Do you know how I've been crying silently everytime she asked you?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't know."

"You didn't know because you chose not to know."

"I'm sorry."

"Do you know how hurt I was everytime I see mom trying to live as if everything is okay? Do you know how hard it was to stop my tears from falling because I don't want to see mom cry?"

Anders hugged Star.

"I'm sorry. I won't leave you again."

Anders held her hand but Star did not let him hold her hand.

Star stood up on her own and drove away from him.

Anders followed her. Anders saw how the crying Star in front of him awhile back just transformed into a very happy  Star.

Anders realized how she was taught to be someone else in front of others. He realized Star used to live with pretentions and might forgot who really she is.

Anders waited for Star but he didn't show up.

Anders realized how Star used to be alone and that she learned to own how she feels.

Anders realized how his absence brought so much changes in Star's life especially in those hard times.

Star on the other hand, used to live without trusting anybody in her life. She learned to control her emotion that she cannot even let others see her weakness. She used to be strong like how her mom used to be strong and secretive.

While driving home, Star noticed a car following her. She tried to avoid it but the car never failed to follow her.

Since she's also afraid that someone might hurt her so she stopped at a place where there are a lot of people.

She didn't think about herself being an artist and walked in the middle of the crowd. She was noticed by fans so they followed and took pictures on her.

Anders helped her out of the crowd. Some were able to take pictures of them  while trying to escape.

It was then published about Star's rumored boyfriend. At the end, Star announced her rest from the showbiz world. 

She then agreed to go back to Philippines.

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