Suits and suspenders - janto teacher au

Memories are all they have

It had only been a week but Ianto had been moping for what seemed like years. It was around midday and he needed milk and bread but there was one problem... he couldn't seem to bring himself to leave his bed. Maybe he could call someone. What would he tell them? Well... he would cross that obstacle when he came to it. Scrolling down his list of contacts he settled on calling tosh.

The phone rang for a few beats before, finally, "hello?" Tosh answered her phone, sounding uncertain. "Hi... tosh listen I-" ianto was cut off when his friend spoke again, "Who is this and why do you have my friends phone?". Ianto frowned "tosh it's me... Wait I'll video call. I really don't know what you're on about". He ended the call, ran a hand through his messed up hair to make it seem more presentable and video called her, tosh picked up almost immediately. "Oh my god ianto" she breathed "why didn't you tell me you were alive". Ianto's frowned once again "tosh.... why is it news to you that I'm alive". Tosh's eyes widened "ianto... have you not seen the news... your car was crashed and you were presumed dead". Ianto froze. How could he have been so stupid? He should have told someone but... he had been so upset. "I'm coming over" tosh announced. "Wait tosh!" Ianto exclaimed just before she hung up "can you bring bread and milk I'm... all out". Tosh nodded "sure but... why didn't you get it yourself". Ianto was about to lie, say he was ill or that he had only just run out. Instead, to his horror, he felt tears welling in his eyes as the truth came tumbling out "Someone took jack away from me" he choked out past the lump in his throat. "Ianto..." tosh murmured sympathetically "listen give me about half an hour and I'll be there".

Tosh was true to her word and appeared half an hour later with bread, milk and a few other 'essentials' as she put it. Ianto put away the shopping in silence smiling slightly as he found ice cream and chocolate. He sat himself down next to tosh when he was done. He glanced at the empty space the other side of him and choked back a sob. He suddenly remembered why he'd been avoiding this sofa all week. Jack. Jack and James Bond nights, as ianto had subconsciously called them. Not to mention jack's stuff was everywhere.

He hadn't meant to tell tosh everything, but somehow it all came pouring out. She held him as he cried but he didn't really want her to. He couldn't help thinking about how jack had done the same thing all those months ago. How jack had whispered comforting words, telling ianto that it was okay to cry and that nothing that happened to him was his fault. Ianto yearned for jack now, but he couldn't have him.

It was around 6pm when tosh finally convinced him to call everyone. Ianto agreed sullenly, so what if everyone thought he was dead? He may as well be. He felt ignored, insignificant and perhaps it was better that way. But tosh insisted so he obeyed, the reactions were how he expected. His sister shouted and cried, Owen swore an awful lot, Gwen let out a theatrical Yelp when she heard his voice and jack... well, jack didn't know. He had no way to get hold of jack. The Americans phone number was no longer in service.

Back in London, england, a distraught jack was being let out of hospital. He still wanted ianto, but Ianto was dead. No one could rescue him now. He had to go through with it. He cried in the taxi the whole way back to wherever John lived now. John fussed over him drying his tears and pressing small butterfly kisses to his bruises. If it had been ianto fussing over him it would have been nice. But it was John... and that made jack feel sick to his stomach. The tears didn't stop though. He wasn't just mourning ianto, he was also mourning himself. Without ianto, jack was a shell of himself. He was lost but this time there was no one to find him. His light has fizzled away and he was left in the dark with nothing but himself. He had to go through with the marriage. John said he wasn't a teacher anymore and that he had a far better job. Jack didn't know what it was but knowing John it was all about the money. Knowing John, he would have been saving up for months for their wedding. Knowing John, he had planned for this.

They pulled up outside a rather large, fancy house just on the outskirts of London. As they entered the house, jack shuddered. It was decorated exactly how he had described his dream house to John three years ago. Two dogs came bounding up to them. Beautiful black spaniels, dogs who matched the interior perfectly. Part of jack's dream life description. He was lead to a bedroom where, in the wardrobe, there was endless variations of his outfit. Jack shuddered, it was all so perfect... and he hated it. He hated it because, though his dreams hadn't changed, the person with who he wanted to share them with had. He still wanted all this, the two dogs, the beautiful house and the large garden but he wanted them with ianto... somewhere just outside of Cardiff. Jack was handed pyjamas and told to change and settle into bed. He did as he was told, almost on autopilot as he fumbled with his buttons.

He was served dinner in bed by John later that evening. He felt like crying. The last time he'd had a tray on his lap in a bed had been when ianto had brought him breakfast in bed on Valentine's Day. The Welshman had curled up next to him and watched him eat his breakfast and sip his coffee. Jack had fed ianto bacon and ianto had made a witty quip about jack's meat which sent them both into a fit of giggles like a pair of school girls. Jack sighed and stared at his ceiling. Now all he had was the memories.

In Cardiff, wales, ianto stared at the tv. The welshman's eyes were unseeing. Tosh had left about an hour ago and ianto had been thinking about jack. Well, he had been remembering because that's all he had now. The memories.