Green Card (ai)

uno

NEW STORY i've heard decent things about my other fan fic so i decided to write a new one, this one being ashton au. i'm really excited bc i love the idea & stuff so yeah! please read & vote & comment i love getting feed back. love you guys you are all bad and beautiful and will marry your fave. I'M HISPANIC AND I'M GONNA DO THE CHAPTERS IN SPANISH BC I LIKE THAT OK BYE. 

I sat in lecture hall listening to my women’s history prof. drone on about the new syllabus for the semester and how important it was for us to have blue, ball point pen for note taking (I always take notes in pencil because I spell stuff wrong all the time). At 3 she dismissed us and I sprung up from my seat and walked quickly out the door. My good friend, Luke, was coming to pick me up to go to something with some of his other friends. He didn’t actually tell me this, but I knew he was going to try to set me up with one of them. I was 18, and hadn’t had a boyfriend since my sophomore year of high school (and hadn’t had done the deed in 8 months not that it was any of his business) and he thought and I quote, “I needed some d in my life.”

I had to admit things were getting a little lonely down there, I actually think cobwebs were forming, but I wasn’t ready for a relationship. I was focusing on school and trying to stabilize my bank account before I decide to commit to someone. And boys were annoying. The last person I did anything with was a girl, I was trying out some new things at the time, and I didn’t really like it. Sadly, I liked men.

I swung open the passenger door of Luke’s mustang and slid inside.

“Hey Lucy,” he greeted. My real name was Lucilla, but he liked to call me Lucy. “Ready to meet the lads?”

“You mean am I ready to be forced to socialize with a bunch of your frat, a-hole friends?”

“C’mon, they’re nice guys,” he said as he started towards our favorite diner downtown.

“I’ve heard that one before. Am I going to be the only female attending this?” I asked.

“No, Alice is going.” My eyes almost rolled out of my head. Alice was most definitely the biggest b in central New York. She was always saying stuff to me that sounded like compliments at first but were actually insults, such as, “Hey, Lucilla I love those jeans but they make your butt look flat? Don’t you think, Luke?”

I know Luke only hung around her because she blew him when she was drunk. It’s not like she was fun or a good friend, just a cold stone bitch.

Luke pulled into a parking space outside the diner, Sylvia’s, and opened my door for me. He took my hand and squeezed it once then let go.

“Let it slide if they say a sexist thing or two,” he leaned down and whispered to me.

“Ha, absolutely not,” I replied as we walked in. Luke walked past me and headed towards a booth that held 3 other boys and Alice. Luke scooted in and sat next to her, leaving me to sit next to a complete stranger.

“Dudes, this is Lucy, Lucy, the dudes,” Luke attempted to introduce us. I turned to the curly haired boy I was seated next to and took his hand.

“Lucilla,” I smiled slightly.

“Ashton.” His smile was large and adorable.  The one next to him, I learned, was Michael. He was hot as hell. The one by Alice was Calum and he was super cute. I tried to ignore how attractive they all were, but it wasn’t easy.  

Things got quiet; I was never one to make small talk, ever. Ashton asked what my major was and I answered, “Sociology.” Then the waitress took our drink orders. I ordered water and continued being quiet until Luke started talking about something slightly interesting but more embarrassing. I didn’t mind.

“So weirdest s(e)x story, loser buys the food and drinks, go.”

“Psh, I have you all beat, okay prepare yourselves,” I said, surprising myself and everyone around me. I took a sip of my water and began.

“So I’m dating this guy for like a week right, and I’m so horny randomly so I call him and tell him to come over, oh and also I’m 16. Anyway, he comes over and sneaks in through the window tripping on the way in, smacking his face on the floor, his nose starts bleeding and its super awkward but I still really need to act on my horniness so I lie and tell him I’m into that stuff and he’s just like okay. So we shove a tampon up the bleeding nostril and start making out and I have my top off and he’s kissing my breasts and stuff, right. Then all of the sudden the tampon falls out and his nose starts dripping blood all over my chest and I scream and he’s like no it’s kinky and starts licking his own blood off of my boobs.”

By the time I’m finished everyone is either on the verge of pissing themselves or staring at me uncomfortably. Ashton is giggling uncontrollably with his head in his hands along with calum and Michael. I made that entire thing up, but they don’t need to know that. I just didn’t have any money to pay so I had to make something up because I have like 4 s(e)x stories and none are weird.

“You never told me about that,” Luke says his eyes wide.

I shrug. “I forgot until now.”

“Okay,” Michael says. “My turn.”

Michael’s story is about a girl who puked on him while he was fingering her and I almost puked myself. He described it with amazing detail. Alice, Luke, and Calum don’t have any and Ashton’s was that a girl bit his diddle doo (his words not mine) once thinking that’s what a blow job was. I won and Alice and Luke split the bill because apparently Calum is broke and living on Michael’s couch. 

As we’re getting up and saying our goodbyes, Ashton turns to me. “So who was the bloody boob guy? Do we know him?”

“I’ll never tell,” I answered. He gave me a small grin and I realized I actually had fun tonight. I’ve met Luke’s friends before and they all hit on me and asked to take me home. But these ones were different. I hugged all of them but Alice before Luke drives me home.

“I actually love your new friends, thanks for forcing me to hang out with them,” I told him.

 He chuckled and gave me a tight hug before walking back to his car. He always walked me up to my door, which was on the top floor of my apartment building. When I unlocked my door and got inside my puppy (which is actually a bear of a golden retriever) Josh, greeted me. I talked puppy to him for a little bit before feeding him and then settling on the couch with a bowl of popcorn and my remote in my hand.