Snow || Myg ff ✔

~10~

⚠️TW: these episodes include some graphic imagery and mentions of self harm, suicide, and eating disorders so read with caution.
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~Yoongi POV~

They say there are five stages of grief.

Denial. 

"She's not gone," I sniffed. "She's not gone. I haven't seen her body, she's... not... gone," I cried. 

Anger.

"It's all my fault. It's all my fucking fault! Agh, I was so stupid! We were so stupid! Why am I so stupid, why couldn't I talk to her!"  I cried as I punched a whole through the wall. My knuckles were bruised, yet the pain had already subsided. Blood was starting to drip through them, too. Yet the pain wasn't there, because the pain I felt inside was even worst. " I was such an idiot!" 

Bargaining...

"I shouldn't have let her go that day... I shouldn't have!" I punched the wall once again. Another hole formed, my knuckles were now red, no skin in sight. The blood splattered into the carpet and wall as I punched it over and over again. 

I never reached that state.

"I'm so stupid! So stupid! I knew about her problems, I knew something was going on, so why couldn't I just ask her, goddammit!"  I punched it once again as tears cascaded down my cheek. I rolled down to the floor, hiding my tears in my hand. "Why couldn't I help her! I'm such an idiot..." I couldn't stop the tears from falling. 

Then there's depression. 

I cried and sobbed. "I'm so sorry, Y/n." I sniffed. "I should've been there for you. But I was blind, I'm so sorry." I tried to stop the tears, yet they wouldn't. I looked over at my knuckles, they were red because of the blood. I squeezed them. "I'm sorry. I should have never screamed at you, I should have never let you go...It should've been me, not you..." I hid my face once more as the tears continued to fall. 

And finally, there's acceptance. 

It was like a light bulb, a sudden idea that would get rid of my pain. I got up quickly, making me stumble as I rummaged through my things. "Knife... where that knife..." 

I never got to that one, either.

I looked at the shining object in my hand as I sniffed and stumbled back down to the floor. The blade was sharp, and the hold strong. I looked at my hand, and my wrist. "Maybe... if I do this... I can now be with you..." I sniffed. "And my pain would stop..." I considered it as I looked over it. I grazed my skin with the tip of the knife, a slight cut forming in my wrist. 

Now, I know that wasn't the best option.

I sank the blade deeper as my body felt almost mechanical, as if doing this was it's goal in life. The only thing it'd ever do. It felt relieving.

But, it was the only option at the time.

I noticed how blood began to drip from the wound. I smirked slightly. "It already feel better..."

And... I guess I'm glad I chose that at the end.

I finished the cut and grazed the opposite wrist with the same knife. I applied pressure. 

Because... 

I let the knife fall down with a thunder, my strength was slowly fading. And black was taking over. I couldn't help but smile as the darkness took me in. I heard some muffled screaming, maybe knocking too. But I didn't care, I let my body fall limp as my wrists overflew with blood.

Now I can spend the rest of eternity with her. 

I smiled as the darkness involved everything. I couldn't help but close my eyes, letting it take me away freely. I didn't hear anything, I didn't feel anything, it was just it. And then, I saw a light. 

Here.

I went towards it. 

In heaven.

~~~

Aaaaand there it is. Last chapter. Whew, didn't think it'd end like this... oh well. I guess I like sad stuff haha. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed reading. ^w^ (And read my other book/s, too. I promise they're good, haha.) 

-L.

Word count: 656.