The Boy in the Bookstore | l.s ✔

Eight

Harry stayed in Anne's room for the rest of the night, not wanting to leave her side in case of another bad dream. He just wanted to feel safe and secure.When 7am rolled around, he was shattered. He really didn't want to have to go into school. He just wanted peace and quiet and to feel protected. He knew Anne would let him stay home, she knew how hard things were for him right now.

'M-mum? C-can I s-s-stay home t-today? With you?' he mumbled, feeling ashamed that he was so unstable he had to interrupt his mother's social life.

'Of course baby. It's my day off today anyway.' she said, giving him a sad smile. Harry didn't know why he deserved such a loving, caring person in his life. Then again, he had a group of people who basically protected him. Why was he so fragile and broken that he needed to be protected? He was scared that his friendships were becoming unhealthy because of him, and he didn't like that. He was anxious around people, but he also craved human contact. It was hard for him, as it meant that he was uncomfortable virtually all the time. He changed out of his pyjamas into a pair of tracksuit bottoms and a red and pink zip up hoodie. He couldn't be bothered to sort out his mess of curls, so he put on one of his beanies - this one was black. When he was dressed for the day, he unplugged his phone from its charger.

Hi guys. I'm not coming to school today because I don't feel up to it. Liam's still excluded, so it's just you two today. Sorry if I let you down... again - H. When he proof-read the message, he questioned himself. Would they think Harry was just being a baby? Would they think he hated them? What if scenarios ran through his head. When Harry had negative thoughts, it was like someone turned a tap on but they couldn't turn it off. Harry had lived with this all his life, so he didn't know any different. He shook his head, trying to get rid of the intrusive nature of what he was thinking.

When he got downstairs, he put some bread in the toaster and made himself tea. He loved tea, he found it very comforting. He was joined in the kitchen minutes later by Anne, who looked tired, but she was smiling - a good sign.

'What should we do today baby? Do you wanna go for a walk or stay home and watch films?' Anne asked, feeling like she already knew the answer he was giving her.

'Stay home, p-please. I may skype with Louis later.' Harry said quietly, looking down.

'Tell me about him, Harry.' he blushed, not wanting to talk about something so personal, so private. He knew Anne wouldn't judge him, so taking a breath, he began to tell her about Louis. He talked about how he was older than him, but how he was shorter by five inches. He told her about his blue eyes and brown hair, and his comforting smile. He explained that Louis gave him the confidence to be proud of who he was, and how he finally had the feeling that he could open up to the older boy. He finished off his talking by saying how safe he felt with Louis, and how loved he made Harry feel.  Harry could see his mum's eyes brimming with tears.

'What's w-wrong? You're a-ahamed, aren't you? 'M sorry, mum.'

'No, love. I'm not. I couldn't be prouder. The way you just spoke about LOuis really impressed me. Yeah, you were quiet, but you barely stuttered. I'm so proud of you for that. And you know the gay thing doesn't bother you. You'll always be my Harry, my son. Please don't apologize, never apologise. I love you.' Harry practically ran into her arms when she said this. He wanted him to hold her, to pick him up and carry him like she always used to. He just wanted to go back to when times were more simple. They weren't easy for any of them, but they weren't too difficult.

'Harry? How about I call Gemma? She's only in Manchester, let's see if she wants to come down and spend the day with us. It can be like old times.' Anne offered, and Harry loved the idea. He nodded his head, excited to see his sister, It had been far too long since they interacted face to face, and she was one of Harry's favourite people in the world. She understood him, and comforted him that he was never alone.  Anne called Gemma's mobile whilst Harry ate his breakfast and drank his tea. His toast and tea had gone slightly cold, but he ate it anyway. His phone vibrated, notifying he had a message. It was from Niall.