almost lover | jeyna

almost lover

Dedicated to TypewriterClicks for being a fellow Jeyna fan and for devoting her time to write stories and poems about it which is really extraordinary. I recommend you people read it .

♚♚♚

Your fingertips across my skin
The palm trees swaying in the wind, Images
You sang me Spanish lullabies
The sweetest sadness in your eyes, Clever trick

They would comfort each other every night after everyone is fast asleep. Both of them lost in their own little worlds. He would sing Roman lullabies to lull her into sleep and she would give in. Because she trusted him. Trusted him too much that she believed that he would never leave her. That they could stay like this forever.

But it was all make-believe. All an illusion. And it destroyed her.

Ω

I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

She would always prioritize others before herself. Rome before happiness. And she was fine with it. Because she thought she was doing the right thing. And she was. Yet, it still ended tragically. Why did things go wrong?

If she became ignorant and selfish, would she still have him?

Ω

We walked along a crowded street
You took my hand and danced with me, Images
And when you left you kissed my lips
You told me you'd never ever forget these images, no

They would spend time on long walks. People would notice and whisper things. But they wouldn't mind because that's just the way they are.

At the most rarest times, when they would hold a celebration and he would notice her alone, he would ask for a dance. And she wouldn't refuse because she secretly wanted it too.

The night before he left, they were under the stars. Hanging out on the rooftop and identifying constellations. Moments like this she wished would last forever. Because she wanted a paradise. But she was mistaken, thinking he was her heaven. And he kissed her lips before leaving her, the spark still lingering on her lips.

Ω

I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind

She cannot visit the ocean. Not without remembering the first time they went there. Cannot walk by the coffee shop and not think about their coffee breaks and long conversations that she didn't know would soon be over. Cannot even wake up in the morning without reminding her the painful memories of making sure that he get up and that they would go jogging together.

She simply cannot. Cannot without him on her mind.

Ω

So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine
Did I make it that easy
To walk right in and out of my life?

And then he's gone with a blink of an eye. Clinging to another and the image haunts her mind. He is fine now and she was left to feel the pain.

Was it ever easy? For him to enter her life, make her believe again, and then leave like nothing happened. Was it that easy?

Ω

Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?

So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
I should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

And she says goodbye to the boy. Her almost lover, her stupid and hopeless dream. She is straining herself to forget him. But why can't it just disappear and leave her forever?

Farewell to her luckless romance. Farewell to everything she thought would make her happy. Ready to turn her back and walked on the opposite direction. Because she should know things like this is inevitable. Love would never be favorable to her and people like him would never end up with her.

"Almost is never enough no matter how hard you try."