No escape

chapter ten

It was finally Christmas eve and Callie was over the moon. She was carefully tucking away all gifts under the christmass tree. I was from taking gifts to Kayden's house but he was not around. I wondered where he might have gone on Christmas Eve. He told me that Christmas is just a normal day to him but he still needed to spend more time with his family. I have been going to Kayden's room every night where we talked and watched movies all night. I made it a habit to sleep there and sneak back in the morning or sometimes I could sneak back after the movies in case I'm not feeling sleepy. Kayden was still trying to make me uncomfortable by flirting shamelessly in front of our parents. Everyone seemed to enjoy when he did so and I think that always encouraged him to go on. I had not sneaked to his room last night because I had crumps. He texted and asked what was wrong and he came immediately though he didn't stay for long. I felt disappointed when I didn't find him at his house because I thought I would get a chance to talk to him since we hardly talked last night. "Harley wait, I have something for you. I almost forgot to give it to you," Callie said handing me a polythene bag. "What's this?" I asked. "I don't know. Kayden dropped it here before you woke up and told me not to show it to anyone but you. He said I too shouldn't check," She said winking. I told Callie thank you and rushed to my room leaving her giggling. I was anxious to see what Kayden had brought me. I checked and my breath caught in my mouth, he had brought five different types of chocolate and a note. "Someone told me it's good on cramps. I hope it works for you. See you later. I missed you" I smiled when I read the note and kissed it. It was something small but it meant everything to me. It was so thoughtful of him and I couldn't believe Kayden had done this for me.
He sneaked into my room that night and we watched a movie but something had changed between us. I couldn't figure out what it was but I knew things were not like they were before. All I could say is that it was fun having him around. His flirting was less annoying now and I blushed everytime he flirted with me. "Do you mind if sleep over?" he asked. I smiled and nodded hugging him. I honestly didn't want him to leave. "Thank you, I missed you last night and I felt like maybe I should spend the whole night with you. We could wait for Santa together," he said poking my cheek. "We ain't kids," I scolded playfully hitting him with a pillow and that called for war. We were both breathless when we finished. We were directly facing each other and staring into each other's eyes. Our faces started inching closer but then someone knocked at the door. "First go back to your room. You will come back later," I whispered to Kayden. "I'm not leaving, just get me somewhere I can hide. Who could that be?" he asked. I shrugged and showed him to the closet. "Hide in there till the person leaves," I whispered. He nodded stepping into the closet and I closed it leaving a small space for breathing. I opened and it was Callie at the door. "What are you doing Harley," she asked giggling. I knew she was up to something. "Am ...I'm ...well ...I was just am organising stuff and I'm going to sleep right now. Goodnight." I said shutting the door. "Hey, why are you in such a hurry. You didn't even ask me what I came for and you're already shutting the door," She said chuckling. "Ok, what do you want?" I said blankly. "Relax girl, you are in such a bad mood but I'm not letting you off the hook. I want us to spend the night together. I don't feel like sleeping and I know you're not going to bed yet," she said walking past me and sitting on my bed. "This is not the time Callie, I really need to rest. I feel so exhausted and crumpy," I said feeling defeated. I knew she wasn't going to leave no matter what I said. "What am I going to do. May be I should send her out for ice cream or juice and Kayden could use that time to sneak out," I thought to myself. I smiled turning to her, "could you get us some ice cream.  I think it will help me kill the sleep." She stood up like she was getting out and I felt relieved just before she turned beaming, "I know Kayden is in here. Come on you guys, I promise I won't tell anyone. Just come out already unless you want me to search for you," She said winking at me. "How the hell did you know that he was in here?" I asked her just as Kayden stepped out of the closet raising his arms in defeat. "You are really smart kid," he remarked. "Wow, so it's true. I didn't know he was here I just guessed because you seemed panicky when you opened the door and the room felt like something was fishy. For example Kayden's jacket hanging right there," she said pointing. I slapped myself mentally. "How did I forget to hide that?" I thought. "That means ice cream for three," she looked joyous as she said that and rushed out. "I can't believe she trapped us, "I said chuckling. "That kid is really smart, God knows what she must be thinking right now," he said nodding his head. "I think I should leave. We can do this some other time," he paused looking at me expectantly. I knew he was hoping I could let him stay. "It's ok you can stay. She has already seen you and she likes you a lot. You don't have to worry about her, she will not tell anyone about us unless I tell her to," I said. "About us, what about us? Wait is there any US?" he  smirked. "Don't pretend like you didn't understand what I'm saying. It's not time for flirting. You know Callie is coming back soon and if she finds you flirting she will think otherwise," I scolded. "It's not like I mind. You must be knowing that by now. Who wouldn't want you," he said this time sounding serious and I shivered. It was getting weird once again. Most times we are just normal friends hanging out but sometimes things get really weird and we get caught in a moment. I started wishing that Callie could come back sooner, she might even be standing at the door to give us time. I know how that kid things. "I should go check on Callie," I said opening the door and there she was smiling. I nodded and grabbed the spoons away from her. We had Ice cream and Callie kept bringing up uncomfortable topics. I still can't figure out why she was so obsessed with Kayden and me. We would all be taken up by the movie and then she blurts out something like, "when are you guys telling our parents about this?" Kayden kept laughing and I kept blushing. "I'm going to tell them soon kid," he replied when Callie insisted. "Kayden!" I said shooting him a death glare. "You know we ain't together, we are just friends and we are never going to date. Why are you poisoning the kid's head with these ideas. Callie I already talked to you about this," I said. "You guys actually talk about me?" he smirked. "No we don't," I said rolling my eyes. "She actually talks about you all the time," Callie said pointing to me. "I know kid, she had this huge crush on me but she is too proud to admit. I wish she was forward like me. We would probably be married right now," he joked. "Kayden stop it," I screamed. "Do you care not to raise your voice. I think you're forgetting that your parents are around," he said winking. Callie seemed to love this exchange and she was just staring and giggling. I bet she was about to say best Christmas eve ever. Callie left for bed and I was left with Kayden. "I'll sleep on the floor just get me a pillow," he said. "No it's not really necessary. You should come and sleep in bed with me today. I trust you. We will just get different duvets," I said. "He looked like he was uncomfortable with it but he agreed. There times when he seemed so free with me and there times when he seemed like he is fighting something. When he looks conflicted and there times too when his flirting seems serious and not innocent. Those are the times when I feel weak in my knees but I know better than to let that get to me.
I woke up Kayden early before anyone could wake up. I knew Callie would come to check on me first thing in the morning and the last thing I wanted was her finding Kayden in my bed. She would keep giggling the whole day and that would raise suspicions. "I really don't want to leave yet. Can't I stay for more ten minutes?" Kayden murmured sleepily. "No, you can't. So get up and go back to your room," I said pulling him. "But I want everyone to know," he groaned. "What?" I asked. What did he mean by that. He just stood up and left me hanging. I closed my window and slept.
                         ***
"I loved the gift you got me, I'm really sorry I didn't deliver your gift in time. I have it here though. Here take it," Kayden said handing me a small box. "It's ok don't worry. It's still just a day after Christmas, that means your gift is delivered just right in time for the opening. Should I open?" I asked hopefully. "You can open it anytime you feel like. It's yours, I just hope you love it," he said smiling. "I know you can't get me anything bad. I trust your taste," I said winking just before my mum joined us. "Let's see what Kayden got for my daughter?" she said sarcastically. Kayden looked uncomfortable and shy. I wondered what he could have got me and curiosity got the best of me. I couldn't wait any longer and plus I loved making him uncomfortable since that's his hobby too. I opened it and pulled out the contents. "No, way" I said giggling. My mum too burst out laughing. "You know what this means son?" She asked Kayden. He looked really shy and I found it really cute. He looked so adorable like that. "I can't believe that you got me these sexy as hell panties, I really love them," I said hugging him tightly. He hugged me and laughed his voice husky. "I'm glad you love them," he said shyly. "You want to see me try them on?" I teased. He just nodded his head and excused himself. "Why don't you go easy on him. You know he likes you alot," my mum said. "I don't understand what you're talking about mum," I said. "I don't know why you can't see it through his eyes. The way he looks at you. Everything he does for you and he is more lively when you're around. Not forgetting the chocolates and those sexy panties you're holding right there. Don't be shallow minded Harley. There is no guy who would buy those for a girl they ain't attracted to. Just think about it, if Ellie had bought you those panties, would it feel normal. You guys are not any ordinary friends, you're just pretending to be friends but you both know that you're more than friends," She said turning to leave. I was left hanging and I examined the gift Kayden had got me. Honestly if Ellie had got me these, I would find it really weird and improper. "Then why does it feel normal to receive such a gift from kayden yet we are just friends," I wondered. "I do surely enjoy his company too but that doesn't mean I have feelings for him. I enjoy Ellie's company too but he is only a friend. Could he actually have feelings form me? Is it why we get caught up in a moment a few times when we are together?" I thought. "These guys just want to make me believe that we are not ordinary friends because they all want us to be a couple," I concluded. I made a mental note to give attention to how Kayden behaves with other  people and how he behaves with me.
                          ***
I had been trying to figure out why people think my relationship with Kayden is not innocent. Like really, they even don't know about us sneaking to each other's bedrooms but they already concluded. I wonder what they will think when they find out. Today is New year's and Kayden asked me to go somewhere with him. He had never asked me to go anywhere with him before. I didn't want to think about it as a date though my mind kept saying it's a date. Callie was the most excited of us all, you could think she was the one going out on a date. She spent the whole day organising different outfits and forcing me to try them on. She really nagged me sometimes but I felt happy to have such a loving sister.
I was ready by seven o'clock and waiting for Kayden to pick me up. I had trouble convincing Callie and mum that looking a little causal is better. I didn't think we were going to a fancy restaurant for dinner or something. "I really think we are just going to have a walk and wait for the fireworks," I had told mum. She seemed to agree with me and changed the outfits. I was now dressed in high waist jeans, a tight tank top and uncle boots. I felt more like me in this. I had done a little makeup. "You look beautiful dear," mum said. "Thank you," I said just before Kayden knocked at the door. "Come in dear, she has been anxious all day. You can't make her wait any longer," mum said. "Mum!" I said shooting her a warning glare. She raised her arms in defeat and left. I turned only to find Kayden checking me out. "You like what you see?" I asked teasingly. "Liking? Hell no! I love what I see. You're so beautiful," he said. "Shall we?" he asked before the situation got weird. "So where are you taking me?" I asked. "It's a surprise," he said. "Ok, I hope it's worth the wait," I said. "Trust me it is," he said placing his hand on my shoulder. He led me to his bike and I felt amused. "We are using a bike?" I asked. "Yes, you don't like my idea?" he inquired and I could notice the disappointment in his voice. "No, it's not that. I'm just wondering that in case I was putting something really tight like a tight dress, I would have ruined your plans," I said smiling. "I knew you were going to wear pants. I know you more than you think," he smirked handing me one of his jackets.  We stared at each other briefly before we got going.
I held Kayden tightly as we rode, I couldn't help noticing that he smelled wonderful as the wind blew his scent right into my nose. I breathed him in and he filled all my senses. I held him tighter and as minutes ticked by, I felt the need to lean against him. I knew this was going to get us in a weird situation but just this once I told my self. I leaned against him and pulled myself closer to him and I had him groan. We finally stopped at a bridge, it was kind of far away from home. I felt Kayden stop and I pretended to be asleep, I still wanted to hold him. It felt so enticing and safe. And the fact that it was wrong pushed me harder to do it. He seemed like he too did not to want me to let go of him. We stayed like that for sometime till he moved his hand backwards and touched my face. I shivered and all the pretence I had kept on was thrown away. Now he knew that I wasn't sleeping but I couldn't just wake up. He caressed my cheek and I closed my eyes devouring the feeling. If this is wrong, then why does it feel so damn amazing. "You should wake up beautiful," Kayden whispered. "Kay,..." I said his name my breath quickening. "I know Harley, relax. I just brought you here because I wanted us to enjoy our first new year together because we still have more of them to celebrate with everyone. I just wanted my first one to be with you. Is that too much to ask?" he said as I got off his bike. I watched him get off and I wondered what was going on in his mind. I just hoped that after this night, we are still going to be the same. It was a beautiful view out here and I wondered how Kayden discovered this place. I also wondered why no one was here if the view was this beautiful. "It's really beautiful," I said as Kayden came closer. "Yeah, I hoped you do like it." He said. "Come, let's sit down somewhere. We will stand up towards midnight, I don't want to miss the fireworks," he said. "So we are just going to sit here all night?" I asked. "Don't you like it?"he asked sounding worried. "Not at all, I just didn't think you were that kind of guy." I said blushing. "Which kind of guy Harley?" He asked staring at me intensely.  "Hmm...the kind of guy that watches beautiful sceneries with a girl." I whispered nervously. I didn't even think he do heard me but he replied. "You're not just any girl Harley, you are my everything." He said and I nodded. Like seriously how did you expect me to respond to that? "Don't freak out Harley, there is so much you don't know about me. I had a girlfriend two years back," he said looking into the sky. He looked like whatever he was about to tell me was a painful memory. I didn't want him to tell me anything unless he was ready. "You don't have to say anything Kay, it's alright with me if we just sit here and wait for fireworks. When I'm with you, even when we are not doing or saying anything, it's the best time of my day," I whispered extending closer to him. "Trust me Harley I know that and that's why I want to open up to you. I want you to know me. You are not like everyone else. You're this special person to me and after her, I thought that was it until I met you. I can't explain how much your friendship has brought happiness into my life but you're not just any friend, you're that one special friend." He said holding my arm and kissing it. "So I had this girl I loved so much. We had so many dreams together. We spent each and everyday together. Everything I did depended on her and I knew she loved me so much just as much as I loved her. I was so sure that she was going to grow old with me. We would have beautiful children and we would be a happy family till the day I woke up and she was gone,"  he paused and I squeezed his arm. I wondered where she do gone but I didn't want to ask. He will eventually tell me. I didn't have to push him to say anything. I of all people knew how much it hurts to lose the one you love. I felt my heart breaking for him. He looked so happy to have gone through that but sitting beside him and listening to his pained voice and words, I feel a pung of pain shooting through my heart. I looked into his eyes and I thought I saw tears. He smiled pulling me to his chest and continued, "we went to parties together but there was a day I was angry at something. You know I had a very bad temper and I was so depressed that I started frustrating her too. She asked me to join her at the bar that night so I could relieve some stress but I declined saying I had a lot of stuff to do. I really had nothing to do. She tried to convince me but I refused. She decided to go alone and I stayed home playing games. She kept texting me that if I were done I could go join her. She said she was with friend but she missed me around. After three hours, she stopped texting me and I thought she do given up. The next call I got had me fainting in my coach." He stopped and this time he didn't stop the tears from rolling down. "It's ok Kay, you can cry. Let it all out," I said wiping his tears. "Harley, if I do gone to the club with her nothing like this would have happened. She wouldn't be dead right now. That girl would be still be alive." He said his voice breaking. I hugged him tightly whispering that whatever happened was not his fault. "You can stop talking about. It's ok, you don't have to tell me anything. I'm comfortable with the little I know about you. You don't have to show me your everything for me to stick around. You already in here and nothing is going to change that." I said tapping my heart. He smiled and kissed my cheek but still continued, "I was told that she got bored and stepped out of the club like you normally do. A strange man came to her and just stabbed her without saying or doing anything and then he left her bleeding to death. Some one found her a few minutes after that but it was almost too late, she had lost a lot of blood. They called for an ambulance but she breathed her last just as they approached the hospital. If I had gone with her, she wouldn't have gone out of that club because I would have given her company and just in case she had gone out, I would have been able to protect her from that man. But I did none of that and I can't do anything to bring her back. She lost her life because I was selfish. She always tried to cheer me up even when I was frustrating her. There is no single day she complained about my bad temper. She took everything I gave her, the pain, the depression, the love. It's not that I didn't love her, but I was ignorant then. I didn't know that being stubborn could cause possible danger. I hated myself after that. I watched the fortage from that night each day and watched as the man took her life away. He got arrested after a serious investigation but I feel like that's not enough for him. At his trial, he confessed that he was drunk and angry because his best friend had run off with his wife. When he saw a girl standing outside a club seeming peaceful, he felt jealous. He didn't want anyone to be happy or peaceful. He wanted everyone to feel hopeless and miserable like him. That's why he went and stabbed her. He didn't plan to kill her but he just wanted her to feel the pain. He was taken to see a psychatrist and after he was sentenced to life imprisonment. Harley, I felt like I was that man. Even though I didn't kill anyone, but everytime I was in pain, I wanted someone else to feel it too. I didn't want to see anyone happy while I was hurting or angry. The reason I blame myself is because I was no different from that man. I had been putting my girlfriend to endless misery all the time I was with her until someone of my own kind ended her life. I felt lost without her, nothing seemed to matter after that but I didn't want to get wasted like most people do. I was broken but I took that as my strength. I decided to change my life for her sake. Maybe that was the price I was supposed to pay. I got a psychatrist to help me with my anger issues and I went to different clubs everyday just to save anyone who might be exposed to something like that. I knew that's the only way I could make up for my mistakes. Until today, I had never felt free. When I first saw you with that man forcing himself on you, I felt like it was my chance to do something in life. Saving you put an end to my misery. It felt like her soul could finally rest in peace. It felt like she was happy about who I had become and she was now contented that I'm a better person. It's not that you were the first girl I do saved, but that day was one of my bad days. I had a fight with my parents, my car got crushed, my assignment got messed up and it was a threat to my graduation but I still managed to rescue you. I wouldn't have done that a few years back, I would simply watch you and feel relieved that someone else is miserable like me," He said pulling me back slightly so that he could cup my cheeks, "I know this is too much to take in but she is not the one who saved me. It's you Harley," He sighed before he crushed his lips to mine.

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