clashildr one shots

Shrödinger's Nonce

Most of Clara's nights were sleepless.
Some of Ashildr's were, too.
Overlap made things interesting.
Some days, it led to adventure; saving worlds, getting shot at, that sort of thing. Others, it led to the two curling up in one of the many armchairs in the library they had slowly filled with their lives and reading their memories to each other. Clara never tired of hearing what Ashildr saw in the world around her, so different was it to her perception: especially of herself. Yet, on nights where the conditions were perfect, their mutual sleeplessness led to confined chaos. Food fights in the diner - spilled milkshakes against the linoleum, laughter and cream on noses, and tipsy conversations that led to interesting morale and philosophical dilemma.
It was on a night such as this, with the Medusa Cascade floating by past the glass of the real-time envelope, that Clara raised the question of the 'Shrödinger's nonce.'
Ashildr, of course, laughed at the very idea. "How can someone be a nonce and not a nonce at the same time?" she had asked.
Clara, in her slightly drunken state, had risen to the occasion of answering the question. "We are both Shrödinger's nonces. Think about it. Let's talk bodies - yours is, effectively, nineteen, and mine is in its 30's. Somewhere. Time travel, it gets difficult to keep track. Meaning, I'm a bit of a nonce. However-" She had nearly fallen over at this point, caught only by Ashildr, who had had her nose booped "-you're four and a half billion, give or take."
"When one is counting in tens of years, days are misplaced. When one is counting in billions of years, centuries get lost. Sit down, you idiot."
(Ashildr had not had nearly as much to drink.)
Clara had slumped down into a booth, still grinning a shit-eating grin. "Fair. As I was saying - you're four and a half billion at our time of eloping, whereas I'm still effectively in my thirties, making you the nonce. We are both nonce-ees and nonce-ers simultaneously! What do you think of that, eh, Ash?"
"I think it's time for bed."