Robbers - [joshler au]

Chapter 14.

Trigger Warnings
//
Mention of; death, sexual assault, drug and alcohol use, overdose
Nightmares
Fear of eating
Fear of vomiting due to grief

Wait to start the song.

It can't be him.

It just can't be.

Brendon held Josh's hand the entire drive to the police station, stroking the top of his knuckles with his thumb. He promised Josh everything would be okay, that it wasn't going to be Tyler. He didn't believe Brendon's words, but he allowed the comfort anyway.

Once they arrived, Josh allowed Brendon to lead him into the station and behind an office to the mortuary. His palms were clammy, clasped in Brendon's and shaking at his side. When they entered the mortuary, the coroner lifted the sheet from the body and Brendon went rigid beside Josh.

His skin was grey, veins protruding in odd places that they shouldn't be, eyes closed and seemingly sunken in. Brendon looked like he was going to be sick and he had to excuse himself from the room. The coroner then looked at Josh. "I'll give you a moment," he said softly and exited the room as well.

Once Josh was alone, he let a couple of tears fall from his eyes. "You stupid boy," he whispered brokenly. "You stupid, stupid boy."

He reached down, his fingertips lightly tracing a pattern on the back of Tyler's hand. Before he could think, Tyler's hand was shooting up from the metal slab and locking around his wrist, a death grip that Josh couldn't shake free from. Tyler's eyes shot open and his face contorted into a grotesque shape as he looked at Josh with disdain. "You did this to me, Joshua." His voice was hoarse and gravelly, sounding like he was gargling on water. "I'm dead, and it's all your fault."

Josh's tears poured down his face at a rapid rate. "It's not my fault," he cried. "This is not my fault, Tyler. You did this to yourself."

"You let me die," Tyler's voice repeated. "It's your fault."

"No," Josh countered. "I didn't do this!"

"Your fault!"

"NO!"

Josh shot up from where he laid between Brendon and Ryan, drenched in sweat, waking the two boys beside him. He barely felt himself breathing, he just cried brokenly into his hands as Ryan and Brendon stroked his back gently. "I'm going to get him water," Ryan announces and climbs up from the bed, exiting the room.

Brendon immediately pulled Josh's head against his chest. "Tell me what happened," he said softly.

"He was dead," Josh whispered, not needing to elaborate for Brendon to understand. "He was dead and it was my fault. He kept saying it was my fault."

Brendon felt himself tense. Even in Josh's subconscious, Tyler was making his life hell. Brendon sighed, pulling Josh closer as he sobbed in his chest. "He's not dead, Josh," he whispered soothingly. "Even if he was, it wouldn't be your fault. You are not in his life anymore. He makes his own decisions."

Josh sobbed quietly. "He said he'd die without me."

"And you know he only said that to try and guilt you into letting him stay," Brendon answered reasonably.