Robbers - [joshler au]

Chapter 5.

Trigger Warning

//

Explicit description of drug use; cocaine, marijuana.
Death.

Start the song. It's Fever Dream by Grayscale.

When Tyler and Ryan came back to the living room, Tyler grabbed Josh's hand and led him back to "their" room, where the both of them immediately climbed into bed and shared a few languid kisses before drifting off to sleep. Tyler's high is most likely what carried him to sleep so easily, but for Josh, he was just tired. He was tired from being high most of the night, but he was also tired because he was sad. He didn't want Tyler to be doing cocaine - he didn't want Ryan to be doing it either, but Ryan could quit if he started while he was ahead. Maybe it was too late for Tyler to quit. Maybe trying to get sober would kill him faster than doing the drugs actually would.

When the morning came, Tyler was up before everyone again, this time making coffee and breakfast for all of them. They all sat around Hayley's kitchen table, laughing and passing a joint around the circle of them. Josh was trying not to think too hard about it, but he just kept picturing what he saw the night before. It made his heart break for himself, but also for Brendon. He didn't exactly seem happy when he told Josh how long Ryan had been doing cocaine, but the most he can do is be supportive and help him quit if it comes down to it. For Josh and Tyler, it probably won't be that easy.

Josh and Tyler left first, Josh needing to get home to shower and get ready before his shift started at work and Tyler asking to drop him off at his house. The entire drive was silent except for Tyler giving Josh directions to his house and Josh confirming them. When they pulled up in front of the house, Tyler didn't get out immediately. Instead, he sighed and spoke softly, not looking at Josh. "Brendon told me you saw last night."

Josh didn't react. He didn't nod, didn't acknowledge that Tyler had even spoken to him for a few minutes.

Tyler spoke up again. "I didn't want you to find out that way, Josh."

"That way," Josh started softly, "or at all?"

Tyler looked slightly taken aback, and slightly hurt. "Josh..."

"Can I ask you something?" Tyler nodded softly as Josh turned to look at him, a look of distress evident on his features. "Were you ever going to tell me?"

Tyler stayed silent for a moment. Josh knew what the answer was, he just really didn't want to hear him say it out loud. "That's not--" he started, shaking his head. "It isn't something you just tell people, Josh. 'Hey, by the way, I do cocaine every now and then. Hope that doesn't bother you.'"

"You could've said exactly that to me and it would've been less of a slap in the face than to actually see you doing it," Josh spoke quietly, a bit of edge to his voice. Tyler didn't say anything back, so Josh continued. "How many drugs do you do?"

Tyler whipped his head back to Josh, brows furrowed and an incredulous look on his face. "That's not fair, Josh," he said, shaking his head again. "You can't just--"

"Let me do it with you, then," Josh cut in, looking at Tyler seriously.

Tyler looked at him with narrowed eyes. "Excuse me?"