Deserve Better

The Tattooed Woman

It was visiting day and I had no one to visit with. I had lost my first fight two days ago and some of the bruises still lingered on my skin. Everyone had started to look the part of Dauntless by now, but I hesitated about that part. I don't know why I wasn't afraid of it, I just felt like I wanted to keep a part of my dead parents alive. Part of Amity in a weird way I guess.

I watched families come and reunite with there siblings and mothers and fathers. I longed to be a part of that. I wish I could be like them. I grew envious of them. I longed to have a special connection with someone. Maybe a friendship. But I was to harsh and strict for those. Maybe a motherly relationship, but I wasn't in a faction yet and I wasn't old enough. A relationship. I don't know how to handle it. Plus who would like me?

I guess love is just a foreign thing to me. I was raised in a loving faction, but they showed no love towards me. I was no more than a broken watch to them. Something rarely right, and something to rid of.

I am jolted out of my mind to gentle yet firm hands on both my shoulders. These hands weren't the hands of Eric the fearless leader. These were feminine hands. They were covered in tattoos. The flames of Dauntless crawled up her arms."Where's your family?" She asked. I looked up at her. Her face was covered in tattoos. A snake wrapped around her left eye reaching over to above her right eye. Vines of ivy climbed her neck reaching the corners of her lips and going up the sides of her face connected to a rose crown on her forehead. She can't be more than 19 but the bags under her eyes make her look older. "They were killed many years ago." I say. She frowned. "Well looks like you could use company." She helps me up. "What's your name?" She asked. "Caroline, Yours?" She smiled. She had been amity, I know because that is an amity smile. "Alexis." She went in for a hug. I hugged her awkwardly but embraced the contact. Maybe I could have one friend. "Not even the Dauntless can take away my amity hugs." I nod. "You were amity?" She replied. "Yes, what 'were' you?" She emphasized the word were. "Also Amity." Her words faltered. "Your Caroline Baker." I nod. Her smile has faded. "How about a tattoo?"

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The needle buzzed on my skin. I embraced the painful feeling of the tip pressing against my neck. She drew straight lines on my neck meeting them in the center. "One of the leaders almost got this tattoo a few weeks ago but he decided on another." She said never looking up. "Eric?" I guessed. She nodded. "Yeah, the other dose look better on him." I nod. "He's hot I'll give him that." I state. Alexis laughed. "Are you sure your not Candor?" She joked. "No I'm completely Dauntless." But that was a lie. Not Candor I think. "Or Erudite, you look at the man like he's a puzzle missing a few pieces." "Cause he is." I say. "I wish I could figure it out." She raises an eyebrow. "Not like that. Anyway what did he place?" I say as she places the needle on a table. "Here, and he placed second." 'Second! He must have been really good.' I thought She holds out the mirror. I like the tattoo. It brings out my jawline.

"Can I get one more?" I ask. She nods. "What one. We stand up to go look at the wall of tattoos. I see one. A skull with vines coming out of the eyes. I bring it to her. "This one. And can I have the vines go down my right arm and have it wrap around my wrist the go down the back of my hand and wrap around my middle finger?" She dose a quick sketch. "Like this." I nod. And she preps the skin once more.

"Let's get back to this Eric ordeal." She says with a smirk. "I don't even know him I told you." I say with a slight smile. "Yeah but you want to know him better." She replies. "I-." That was true, I had no reasonable rebuttal for that. "Plus I don't like the way his eyes linger." She begins with the needle, I hiss. "So he looks at you?" Her eyebrows are raised but she didn't smile. "I would smack you right now if my arm wasn't being permanently inked on." I say. It's only partly a joke. "Oh come on," she sighs. "It's not like-." "Like what." A distinctly male voice echos through the empty room. Alexis smirks. "I have good hearing and I can't help to be near enough to hear my name." He said keeping eye contact with me. I didn't know eyes could be so calm and cold all at once. "So you were eavesdropping?" I say. "You could say that initiate." I take a breath. "Eric I have a name." I say. "I know." He said. "But you ARE and initiate. And you ARE going through the process that I run, so I am in control." He said stalking closer. He glances down. "Oh and by the way Caroline, Nice tats." And then he leaves, still smirking. He used my name.

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I sat alone and ate chocolate cake with my left arm, the only thing that didn't throb in discomfort. I'm glad I got tattoos, I made a friend in the process as well. I had on the sports bra from last night sill on. Every initiate eyes were glued to my red irritated neck and red irritated arm as I ate.

After the cake it was time to reveal. Who would be sent to die with the factionless and who would continue to be Dauntless. I feel nerves bounce in my stomach. I know I won't die, but I want to place well.

Max rings a bell and we know to leave. I stick in the back so I don't scratch my arm against the wall.

Once we get there I look over every ones head to read the names. The first one I read is Edward, the second is Caroline.