Deserve Better

The Pain of Losing

Over the past few days me an Eric had got to know each other better. He pulled me out of the dorms to keep Peter from striking again. So I mostly slept on Alexis' couch.

Me and Eric talked at night once every one was asleep. He would knock on the door twice them four times then three then twice more. It was complicated but I liked watching him struggle the first few times.

I heard the knocks and opened the door. "Hey." I said. "Hello sunshine." Since that morning it became his nickname for me. "So what do you want to talk about today." I say as we strolled to his apartment. "I wanted to tell you Max has been keeping an eye on you. He wants you as a leader." I smile. "I know." I say. Some of Eric's cockiness has rubbed off. "Oh do you know?" He smiles. "I bet I could take you!" I say. "Wanna place a bet on that." I scoff. "Okay, the winner has to get the others choice of a tattoo." "Shake on it?" He holds out his hand and I take it. We both leave hand prints on the others hand. We have challenged one another from the moment we met.

The training room was empty as it should be at 11:35pm. I hop on the mat. He takes of his vest and gets in as well. "Conceding allowed?" He asked. "Yeah I don't wanna get my score lowered due to missing more days." I say.

I hold tension in my stomach, and block my nose mouth and ribs, leaning on my back leg mostly since I would kick with the leg that was forward the most. He punched and I moved away quickly and dodge it. "What?" I smile. "You can't touch this?" I say jabbing at him. He blocked it easily. "Come on, hit me!" He said. He punches again and i doge it. While his guard was down I punched his nose. He groaned but still smiled. Blood trickled down his face. I went to kick him by he grabbed my foot. "Very funny." He forces me down and slings me a little bit.

I yelp I landed on my shoulder. It popped out of socket. I hissed. I landed of the mat that's why the hit was so hard on my shoulder.
Eric saw this, we never apologized for things like this in Dauntless, but I could tell he felt bad. I wanted to say I was okay but all I could say was. "I lost." He smiled a little at that. "Well I broke your nose so that's something." I say pushing myself up. I groaned.

We walked to the infirmary. I bit my lip the whole way. Every step sent a shock wave of pain through my shoulder. The pain was horrible but I toughed it out. The nurse gave me pain medication and popped that sucker right back in there. "Rest it for 24 hours then you should be good to go." I nod. "Thank you." I say she grunts.

We walked toward Alexis' room. "I'm think you get a mouth on your boob." I roll my eyes. "Okay then. Not feeling that..." he trails off. "Get my name tattooed on your left ass cheek!" "What no way in hell!" I say. He smiled. I realized my mistake. I reacted. I facepalmed. "Fine but since you hurt me you have to get.... a snake tattoo in your armpit." He sighed softly. "Do I have to...." "stop complaining." He laughs. "Fine." I laughed. "Your a baby Coulter." "No I'm not sunshine." I laughed as he walked down the hallway. "See you and your new tattoo tomorrow." "Same for you." I yell, not worried. Most Dauntless sleep like the dead and Alexis is no exception to that.

I walked in and laid down on the couch. I  tried to get my shoulder comfortable but when I couldn't I just closed my eyes and slept.

I'm the morning I did my fear landscape and since I was one of the first people I had some time on my hands.

I'd better get the tattoo or Eric will nag me about it. I walked down to the tattoo parlor and sat down and waited for Alexis. I thought to myself, how on earth am I going to explain this. To her. My arm is in a sling and I'm getting Eric's name tattooed on my butt.

"Caroline, what happened to you." Alexis said. "It's a long story I'll tell you when we get to your room in the back." She looked at me suspiciously. She knew I was friends with Eric but she didn't know we sparred last night. She knew that during the day I was an initiate and night we were 'best buddies' as they would say in amity.

"So what are you getting?" She asked on the way there. "Okay this is an odd request but I need Eric's name tattoo on my left butt cheek." She stops. "I told you I'll explain later." She just keeps walking with a smirk. "You better girl or I'm going to mess up your next tattoo."
I laugh, knowing she would with out any hesitation.

"Okay get explaining." She got the needle ready. I laid there with no pants on and just kinda waited for the first shock of the buzzing needle. "Me and Eric were talking last night, and we got talking about the rank. I told him I could take him anytime and we bet on it." I smile at the memory of it. "We bet who lost would have to put up with the pain of losing as well as a permanent mark of the others choice." She had finished the E R in cursive. "I broke his nose, he dislocated my shoulder and I couldn't fight anymore so I lost the bet and I made the mistake of reacting to this option so it's what I had to get." I say she finished up.
"He's gonna make you show him the tattoo right?" I responded. "Most likely." She raised her eyebrows and I slapped her Arm gently, and laughed.

********************************************

I heard the two, Four, three, and then two knocks. "Ready to get that tattoo?" He asked. I smile. "Already did." I say simply. "I don't believe you." He said crossing his arm. I turn around and pull the hem of my pants down just enough on one side to show him. "Loser." He put his left hand on his head in the shape of an L. "Your childish Coulter." He fake pouts. "No I'm not."

I punch his shoulder and we started to walk. He unlocked his apartment and we went in. "How's your shoulder?" He asked. "It's almost better, thanks to the medicine they gave me." He looks relived. "Why do you ask do you feel guilty?" He looks away and shyly responds. "A little," I am a little surprised. Eric never admitted to anything like that. "Who are you and what have you done with Eric." "I don't know I just don't like the fact that I threw you 5 feet by your leg and you popped your shoulder out when you landed on it." He looked guilty. "It's fine." I say.

I sit in a chair while he lays on the couch. "Lets watch a movie." I say. He nodded. He put in a really old movie. Like really old. It was called titanic. "It was based off a ship that was supposed to be unsinkable." He said. I'd never heard of this before. I look at him and smile. "What?" He said. "Your Erudite is showing." He rubbed his neck. "It happens sometimes."

Then I heard a low yet terrible sound. Even in the underground parts of the Dauntless compound we could hear thunder. The compound was supposed to scare people in little ways like that. My eyes went wide. I whimpered. "Eric." He looks up confused. "BOOM!!" I ran over to Eric and cuddled into him. He didn't recoil he just let it happen. He played the movie. I really liked the girl with red hair, Rose. She was kinda brave in her own way.  Definitely about defying her mother and rich fiancé.

Whenever we heard a clap of thunder Eric would look over at me. I would hide my face in his chest. I could be surprisingly small for being his height. Slowly my eyes grew heavy. Somewhere around the spitting part where jack teaches rose to spit. I decided to close my eyes for just a few minutes and before I knew it I was asleep.

(This is from a different pov)

"Caroline?" Eric said. He looked down at her. Her eyes were closed. She must have fallen asleep on his chest. He tried not to laugh when he saw the little string of drool falling from her mouth. He wiped it away quickly. He let himself run his fingers through her long brown hair. Suddenly he realized why he was so drawn to her spirit. He had developed feelings for her over this short time. He didn't like this. He knew she wouldn't feel the same, but for this one moment, he would allow himself to savor. He let his arm pull her in and he soon fell asleep with her.