tear me apart ~ creek ~ South Park

.captain spacey.

"I want to open my mind. There is no concept of time. I want to drift alone. I need my mind to be blown. Sputnik can see me. I look the earth in its eyes. It doesn't want me.."

~~~

"Captain spacey" ~ sonic sea turtles

~~~

⚠️triggers⚠️
❗️mentions of drug abuse❗️
❗️mentions of self harm❗️
❗️the f slur ❗️

~~~

Craig laid in his bed staring at the ceiling. His NASA blanket partly over his body, partly falling off the bed. Translucent stars were scattered around the roof of the room. They all glowed in the dark which Craig enjoyed. He liked looking at them at night. There was other things were hanging from his ceiling that caught his eye as well. His hand rested on his stomach as he counted each star repetitively. He was aching from last night, besides the headache, his entire body felt sore. It was partly from the alcohol and partly from Tweeks fist. The night before was a blurry mess, it hurt to think about it.All he remembered was Stan, the cops, and most importantly, Tweek. He could recall drinking then being plummeted to the ground by a small figure. The entire night was a drunken haze. Everything in his mind kept repeating but came out blurrier and more distorted each time.  It felt surreal, everything was shakey and loud. The noise of the music continued ringing in his ears long after the incident. Then there was THAT problem. The problem that Craig couldn't get out of his head. The problem that Craig Tucker remembered perfectly. The problem that he thought was all a dream. Everything happened so fast, he watched from the cop car helplessly and drunk. But in reality if he was there he didn't know what he would do. Would he intervene? Would he take Tweek away and protect him? Would he laugh quietly to avoid any negative attention brought his way. He wanted to lie and say he would protect Tweek but he wouldn't. Craig would let it happen just like he did in the cop car. Although it's not like he had a choice to begin with. Either way, something in him felt guilty. The feeling had been here since that day he was outside by the fence with Kenny. It burned like hell, he knew that much. It was a sickening feeling that came in waves. After he watched Tweek get hit by his parents the feeling was worse. So strong that he couldn't avoid it at all. The waves didn't seem so weak now, each time they came around it felt like a punch to the face. A punch from the blond spaz Craig hated. The feeling consumed his entire being, throwing off any productivity in his daily life. He hadn't gotten out of bed since he ended up there that night. Craig's Dad was mad, but his mom seemed to calm him down. With the idea of moving and Tweek in his head, he didn't know what he wanted. At this point moving away seemed very convenient. He couldn't hurt Tweek anymore, but he also couldn't protect him. But why would he want to protect the Spazz? The fucker just beat him up and left him with a black eye. Although something in Craig knew he deserved it.

Breaking Craig's depressing inner monologue was his phone. It rang loudly setting off his headache. The pain shot through Craig's forehead to the back of his neck. Letting out a loud groan he rolled over in bed. The nasa blanket twisted around his slim frame. Craig glared at the number.. or name on the phone he saw. He could barely make out the letters due to his blurred vision but the scribbles connected the dots in his mind. Craig's shakey hand reached out for his phone uncoordinatedly. Barely grasping the iPhone he aimlessly pressed his thumb to the phone. Whether it declined or accepted the call he didn't care much. Whatever Kenny, the caller, had to say wasn't worse than how he felt at that moment. Luckily for him his thumb jabbed at the accept button on the phone. Suddenly, to Craig's dismay, Kennys obnoxious voice came through the phone. "Hello!" It shouted. Craig groaned quietly and flopped back first into the bed. "Hey.." Craig sighed out. Kennys words came though clearly but Craig's mind didn't process them. Each word sounded like static to his cluttered brain. Craig only focused on his light breathing and pain that coursed through every muscle in his body. Dragging himself back to reality Craig did his best to focus on the muffled voice coming through the speaker. His shakey hand pressed the phone to his ear as he listened in to whatever Kenny had to say. "So, I was wondering if you want to come over. Karen wants to see your sister." Kenny ended his sentence. There was a catch, there always was a catch, but Craig didn't hear it since his brain shut down on him. Not wanting to ask questions he replied with a quick "Sure." Shortly after he hung up and dropping his phone onto the bed. The ravenette didn't have time to weigh the pros or cons so he decided to do that now. He wasn't the type to not cop out. He's lied plenty of times about being places so if he didn't show it wouldn't be the worst thing he's done. In fact he knew the worst thing he's done.