The Script

Chapter 3(Part 1)

I'm finally home and I'm breast feeding my child, Angelina, who in my family call her matric certificate. This is because I had her when I was 16 and so I was suppose to finish school before having a child. Mr X gave me a lift home after our second "round" which I enjoyed even more than the other " rounds". The time is 6:37 pm and I'm waiting for 8:00 pm to hit so I can start studying.  

My mom,Mshindi Singo, is calling me with her african voice again. Now you know where my name comes from. My mom. "Mshindi weh! Come with the child.""Ohh okay mom I'm on my way." I'm so happy that my mother is helping me raise Angelina because I would have killed the baby a long time ago if she did not convince me not to. 

I walk up to my mom in the huge sitting room, with tailor made couches and a 67" television on top of a automatic fire place. She sees the blue mark on my eye bag. " Haibo girl, and then? Mxm. Is it Ja-ja urgh I cant even pronounce that child's name." "Yes it is. We fought again, I pulled out her hair and then we fought again in class . She won this time." My mom sighs.

 I have a disorder called borderline personality disorder.The cause is unknown but the symptoms are ; emotional instability, feeling worthless and impulsivity in social relationships. So basically, Im mentally ill but I know how to hide it. Not because of the pills I take, I've adapted to it. But its haunting me now. " Shishi listen, I cant keep telling you to leave that child alone. She hates you so let it be."

I roll my eyes and walk into the kitchen and open the double  fridge . I take out my favorite food,left-over pizza from yesterday. I eat my pain away but I'm so surprised that I dont gain any weight at ALL. Anyway, my mother follows me and so does Angii. Shes a bundle. Not of joy . I knew you would think of that. Shes a mix of joy, frustration, anger, irritation and everything that only emotions can describe. All she does is scream, cry and shout all day but shes the reason why I stay in school. To watch her grow one day.

  I run up to my brothers room and tell him what transpired at school today. He is a stoner . Weed now, weed today, weed tomorrow, weed forever . G-A-N-G-A KING FOR LIFE!!!!!." Siphelele!" is what I recklessly shout in joy so he can open the door. In irritation he shouts;"Mshindi!". I ask to come in and we talk until the clock hits 7:30 pm. As much as I love Jhene, Siphelele is my eeeeeeeeveeeerything. He gets me just like how Jhene gets me. 

I rush to my room and its 7:59:59 pm to study and Angii is asleep so less stress. I study until 11:30 pm . Its 30 minutes until tomorrow and I receive call from private number and I hate calls. In fact I hate social media in general. I only use my phone for pictures . "Hello?" "Hi. Do you know who it is?" I drop the phone and my phone rings. This time, there's a number showing. I answer it ."Hi. This is Libra." 

Libra is the father of Angelina.  Him and I go way back . Like since I was 5. His been my crush since then. He was my first kiss, my first fuck, my first boyfriend , my first everything. He still is my boyfriend but I do not like saying it. He took responsibility when I found out I was pregnant. He has not left me and he promises he never will. Lies. " Look I want us to meet tomorrow if you have a class?" "No biggie but I'm coming with Angii ke." " Its okay." "Love you. Sleep tight. bye"

I go numb because he does not know that Angii, is not his child. Its Mr X's child. Even he does not know that. Either way, I'm going to see my "man" is what I say to myself before I force myself to sleep.