A Court Of Flowers And Shadows {Azriel Shadowsinger}

Chapter Two

There were multiple things that only living in the Spring Court made Amara miss the Night Court more than she usually did. One of those things was conversation, another was the fact that things always seemed to flow and life never seemed to stop moving.

The final thing though, and one that meant the most to Amara, was that she never had to pretend to be somebody that she wasn't. Here she had to be the perfect little lady, speaking only when spoken to and pretending like she didn't have her own thoughts. She had to keep a smile on her face and make sure that her hair was perfect and that there wasn't a single crease in her overly extravagant dress. She didn't have to pretend that she wasn't more powerful than her High Lord older brother just so that she didn't seem like she was more than ready to take over the court or likely to force people to rebel against his leadership.

But at the Night Court... Amara could be herself. If flowers were dying she could heal them. If she wanted to sit on the balcony and close her eyes and feel every living thing and revive them if necessary, then she could. If she just needed someone to hold her in silence, Cassian was there in an instant, wrapping her up in his arms and his wings so she felt like the world had disappeared for just a little while. If she needed someone to vent to or cry to, Mor would be in her doorway with a bottle of wine and a soft smile. If she needed encouragement or advice, she could go to Amren who was always down to have a go at someone and hype them up if they were feeling insanely insecure.

At the Night Court, Amara could be herself and she didn't have to worry about people judging her or telling her to be a certain way. It used to be like that here at the Spring Court as well but that was before Tamlin was her only living relative and the two of them could still be... well, normal.

Lately, Amara had been spending a lot more time in the gardens. Before everyone in the Spring Court hated her, Amara had always been forced to go anywhere outside of the four walls of the manor with an escort. She'd used to hate it and she complained about it every single chance that she got. She had craved privacy every single day and every single day she had never gotten it. But now she just wanted to have that constant presence of someone lurking and pretending that they weren't watching her every move.

She had never imagined that she would wish for someone to escort her around the grounds and to care that the sky looked like it was about to rain so they should get her inside before it did so she didn't catch a cold.

She just wanted someone to care.

A soft sigh left her lips as she sat down on the bench in front of the rose garden. Personally, Amara hated roses but whenever she was here, she felt close to her mother again. These roses were the mating present from her father to her mother and while thinking about her father made her mad and hurt, thinking about her mother gave her hope for happiness and makes the possibility of love more alive. Her mother had always been the one to remember Amara existed. When it came to her father, it was all about his sons, the ones that would take over if he died or wanted to hand over the title to one of them. Amara had pretty much never existed to her father though people who had been around during her childhood would always deny that fact.

But her mother... her mother had been the reason Amara had never run away from home. Her mother was the reason that Amara was still undeniably loyal to the Spring Court because if she lost this court, she lost the last thing that she had to remember her mother by.

A frown made it's way on to Amara's face when she noticed that some of the petals on the roses were beginning to wilt. It looked like with everything going on, the gardens weren't being kept anymore which meant that Amara was likely to lose her safe place. It was the only place that she could feel at peace, where she could feel like maybe things would be okay. Because if the flowers can revive and be brought back, then surely her happiness can as well?

She sighed softly and cupped the closest rose in her hand, closing her eyes and concentrating on making sure her powers reached out to all of the other roses in the garden. She didn't need to concentrate as much as other people probably would have had to, as much as Tamlin would have had to.

It made her terrible to admit it but she kind of hoped that this curse wasn't broken. It made her feel almost normal to not have to worry about slowly letting out streams of her power so that she didn't break under the pressure of it all.

Once her eyes had opened again, all of the roses had regrown, the petals had become more vibrant and all signs of wilting were gone. She sighed softly and tucked a strand of hair behind her, glancing around the small garden to make sure that nobody had seen her. If she displayed too much then Tamlin would find out and everything would go wrong. Their relationship would grow even tighter than it already was and she might even get sent out one day instead of one of the soldiers. The only reason that she hadn't been was because Tamlin was more mad at himself than he was at Amara because he was the one that told her to stay home and he wasn't aware of the fact that she'd snuck out.

She was safe because Tamlin didn't know the full truth. She was safe because Tamlin didn't know that she snuck out multiple times a month and disappeared to the Night Court. She was safe because Tamlin didn't know that her mate was part of the Night Court's Inner Circle, or that she was a part of that Inner Circle as well.

Because Tamlin knew none of this, Amara was safe.

That was when she heard it.

A small flutter of wings.

And yet... there were no birds in the sky or in the trees at the edge of the garden walls. Then again that flutter of wings was a lot louder than it should be if it was just a few normal sized birds.

This wasn't the first time that Amara had been sat somewhere in the Spring Court and heard a flutter of wings. Sometimes the flutter was also accompanied with a flash of blue but whenever she had brought it up around the boys, they'd all dismissed it and told her that maybe staying in Spring so much was driving her crazy and that she should just permanently move to the Night Court instead. Eventually she had just stopped bringing it up but it had always been in the back of her mind whenever she saw them.

It meant a lot that they checked on her but it meant even more right now. The only issue was that whenever she saw a flash of blue, it made her wonder and hope that maybe Azriel would one day actually talk to her about the mating bond. That the next time she saw him would be the time that they'd have a proper conversation instead of just a few polite words.

Amara didn't have any actual evidence that it was the boys doing it or that it wasn't just some birds that she hadn't seen. The only thing that she knew that she felt safer when she heard it. She didn't want to give away that she knew for definite it was them because then they might stop but every single time that it happened, the ache in her chest lessened. Every single time.

If she was going to continue hearing it then maybe the next forty-nine years might be a lot easier to handle than she originally thought.