When She Died

Part 2 :When I Fell in Love with Her

▪ When I Fell in Love with Her.

We were classmates throughout elementary and seatmates during high school.

That was the time when I got to know her more.

Hindi na kami masyadong nag-aaway.. ng kaunti.

Of course, there were still misunderstandings. But those only strengthen the bond of our friendship.

She referred to me as her bestfriend and I referred to her as mine.

When I think about my highschool days with her, isa lang talaga yung memory ko with her na nangingibabaw sa lahat..

Our Prom.

I didn't have the courage to ask her to be my date, so she went with someone else.

I didn't dance or talk the whole night, and just watched her with her date with jealousy.

She was beautiful. She is, always.

And I hated myself for not being brave enough. For not being worthy enough.

I  swear I wanted to punch her date's face, but I kept my cool.

I didn't want to ruin this night for her. Ngayon ko lang siya nakitang ganon kasaya. And it pains me so much that she was that happy without me.

In the end. I still lost it.

We went home together and had a huge fight.

Hindi ko na kasi kinayang hindi siya sitahin sa pagiging close na close niya sa ka-date niya.

Pero ang totoo, selos na selos lang ako.

Still wearing her Prom dress, she confronted me while crying.

''Eh di dapat nagkaron ka ng lakas ng loob na yayain ako na maging date mo para hindi ako ka-date ng iba!'' sigaw niya sa'kin bago siya padabog na pumasok sa bahay nila.

She was right. Alam ko.

Kaya nga mas masakit iyon. Na dahil sa katangahan ko, nasaktan ko din siya.

I love her, but I was too terrified to tell her.

Kaya naman sinarili ko na lang.

Ayoko namang ito pang nararamdaman ko ang makasira sa friendship namin.

I never want to lose her.

If I can be with her, even just as a friend, I'll take it.

After that, I never did anything to disappoint her or make her cry ever again.