Secrets [Todoroki]

*Chapter Sixty-Two*

Miri woke with a start. She flung up in her bed, a choked gasp escaping her. She rolled around on her mattress, trying desperately to untangle herself from her blankets.

She fell off the bed and on to the floor. She lay on her back, stunned.

She took a deep breath, trying to get her racing heart to calm down.

'Was it real? Or...was it a dream?' She looked around her room, trying to pinpoint any changes.

She grabbed the clothing on her body, looking down at it. 'Was I in my pajamas in my dream? I don't remember.'

The door to her room was flung open. Todoroki stood in the doorway, breathing heavily.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?" He knelt down beside her, reaching out to touch her.

Miri flinched, her eyes flashing around the room. "Was it a dream?"

He stared at her, retracting his hand. "No. No, it wasn't."

Miri closed her eyes, laying back down on the floor. "I can't believe..." She sniffled, feeling her eyes burn. "That was me." She stared at her hands. "I was in control, but out of control at the same time. I wanted to move, but every time I did, it hurt you guys." She clenched her hand into a fist. "I can't forgive myself."

"I can forgive you." He sat back on the floor.

"No!" She sat up. "You can't. You can't just do that and pretend everything is okay!" She tugged her hair. "It's not. I lost control and hurt you all. Whose to say it won't happen again? I mean, I-I have to go!" She tried to stand up. "I have to tell Aizawa I can't stay in the dorms!"

Todoroki stood up briskly and grabbed her arm. "Hold on, you don't have to do anything-"

Miri tugged against the hand on her arm. "Don't touch me! I'm not safe!"

"Miri, stop-"

"No, you!" She exploded, wrenching her arm free. "I'm not safe for people to be around. Not like this. Obviously, I can't control my emotions enough to prevent my quirk from spiraling out of control. Can't you see that? I'm not okay here," She pointed to her head. "So I won't be okay here." She held her hands out to the room.

"We got you to calm down-"

"Do you even know why I was angry in the first place?" She demanded.

"Stop!" He barked, grabbing her shoulders. "I know why. It was that stupid piece of paper. I read it, Miri, but I also know you've had this built up hatred of Hibiki. You were a ticking time bomb. Do you want to know why?"

He paused, watching her face. "You have such high expectations for yourself. You want to be perfect so badly that it's taken over who you are. You walked into U.A. wanting to be perfect, and you're standing in front of me right now still wanting to be it. Just stop. For one second." He whispered. "You're not perfect. Nobody is. The more you try to be, the more it eats up who you really are. You can't pretend you're fine when you're really not. You lost control because you tried to carry the world on your shoulders. You wouldn't allow yourself to be human like the rest of us."

"I can't." She whispered, fists pressed against his chest. "I can't allow it. You saw how I was. I'm hardly even human as is."

He grit his teeth. "Human is not-"

"Do you understand how pathetic you sound?"

The two of them turned to see Bakugo standing in the doorway, hands shoved deep into his pockets.

"Excuse me?" Todoroki narrowed his eyes.

Bakugo took his hands out of his pockets and took a deep breath. He then contorted his body to be in a mockingly feminine manner. "Oh! Look at me! I'm Mirianne Shittymoto or whatever my last name is! I want to be a hero who saves people, but oh noooo!" His voice was obscenely high-pitched, and he was prancing around the room. "I can't get over my internalized perfectionism from years of emotional trauma from my old hag. I also think Icy-Hot is reallyyyy cute, but I'm too much of a stupid chicken-shit to ever admit it to him! Oh! Let's not forget, I think Katsuki Bakugo is so much stronger than me and he's so amazing!"