Memoria. | Kozume Kenma

04

tw: anxiety/panic attack

Wait— I'm partnered with him?!

My eyes widen upon realizing that he and I are going to be partners. I bite my lip, feeling the frustration from just hearing her say that. I continue writing my notes, adding more information about the lessons in my own words, just so that I could distract myself. I add small doodles that signifies whatever's written on my notebook.

"So here's the project, make a miniature house, completely furnished; measurements must be exact and precise, design it and make it look like your trying to sell a house." Our teacher explains, sounding like  she actually want to torment us with this project. "Go ahead and discuss with your partner about what you would be doing. Make sure to pass an output for today." She shows an evil grin, gesturing everyone to start.

I look at him and I could already feel the stress just by it, I don't know, I'm starting to really dislike his attitude. Kenma looks at me, a bit hesitant to speak; I look away and turn to my notes, trying to think of something to do for the project. I hear him sigh, feeling that he had looked away already. I can't be partnered with him, things are incredibly unwell between us and I don't want to speak to him.

I write what I plan we should do for this stupid subject, writing every single detail so that I wouldn't have to write for him again. I slide the paper to him, leaning on my chair to wait for a response. I hear him let out another sigh, this time it was long and deep. I'm the one who should be stressed here, but I guess we both are.

"Can we talk and not pass notes?" He asks, sounding a little bit hurt from the way how we were communicating. I didn't answer and just waited for him to write back. "(Y/n)." He calls out, frustrated by the way I acted. I don't want to speak, not right now. "Fine, you can decide on what to do and how we communicate." He slides back the paper in front of me, he didn't write anything. Wait, he did.

"I'm sorry."

Seeing that on the paper made me want to just say, "okay, we're good now," but no. I shouldn't. I'm tired of hearing people apologize for their sins, then they'd do the same thing all over again. It's just going to be the same like how I got treated by a former friend; he apologized but he still left me all on my own, I won't fall for the same thing again. Though, Kenma and I aren't friends, I don't think we ever were.

I write our output in a separate paper, standing to go to my teacher to pass it. She raised her brow at me, eyeing me and my seat mate as if we did something wrong. She takes a look at the paper I handed her, furrowing her brows as she read what I had written. She hands it back to me, clasping her hands and looking at me seriously.

"Are you sure that both of you have agreed on this?" She asks, giving me look to make me spill the truth. I nod slowly and she just looks at me. "I didn't see any discussion between you and Kozume, it has only been three minutes and I don't think that you would come to an agreement inside that period of time." I frown at her words, feeling so pressured about having to discuss it with him.

"(Y/n) came up with an idea as you spoke about the project, we both agree to this." Kenma takes the paper from my hands, giving it back to her. I step back a little, not wanting to be too close to him. "Please accept this output." He begs the teacher and she gives us both a look, she gives in and takes the paper from him. I went back to my seat the moment she got a hold of the paper.

I slump on my seat, taking out my journal to write a new entry. I heard the sound of his chair, making me hide my face with my hair, not wanting to see him. For some reason my heart started beating so fast when he went up to help me convince the teacher, my cheeks also felt hot at that moment; it just means that I don't want to be around him right now.