Leather Kisses

Leather Kisses. 5

"Wonderful!" Mrs. Delgado clapped her hands together. "Think you could start today?"

"I guess," I muttered, having no legitimate reason to say no.

"Great, I'll let Dean know right away," she said, scribbling onto a neon green Post-It. "You guys will meet after school in the library. You're free to go."

I nodded, bid my farewell, and headed back to class. Walking through the deserted hallways, I contemplated the disaster I had just gotten myself into. Tutoring Dean was another lie to be told, another secret to be hidden, and another burden on my plate. If word got out, I was screwed.

And yet, I was almost excited for this opportunity. It felt wrong, but it felt right. In my mind, I was spiting, betraying, and disregarding Blake. Similar to playing the guitar, it gave me a sense of power and rebellion; all strength I would later need.

By the time I got back, the class was practically over. I quickly jotted down the remainder of notes on the board and then packed up my backpack. When the bell rang, I hurried down to the lobby, hoping to catch Blake before he headed for the parking lot.

Searching through the sea of people, I found him standing in a big huddle with his football friends. When the cheerleaders began to break into the circle, I did the same.

"Hey baby," he greeted, kissing my cheek. I choked back a noise of disgust. Before lowering his voice, he scanned the faces of his friends to make sure they weren't watching. "You want to tell me what that announcement was about?"

The thing I hated most about our relationship was the lack of privacy. It wasn't the violence or the limitations or the hurtful words - it was the fact that he needed to know every bit of information about my life.

"Just some college stuff," I lied. "Look, I have to stay after school so you don't need to drive me home."

Blake glared at me through skeptical eyes. "Oh okay. And what are you staying after school for?"

"Just a thing," I replied with a shrug. At least I didn't lie that time, I just avoided the truth.

"What kind of thing?" Blake asked again, his cheeks turning a shade of crimson.

"Nothing, don't worry about it," I answered, brushing him off. Already, the strength was building inside of me.

Blake's eyes filled with fire, his jaw clenched in fury, his breathing pattern grew heavier. "You better tell me, or else -"

"You'll what?" I cut him off. "Hit me? No, you won't. Not in front of everyone."

He wanted to hurt me, he wanted to cause me pain, he wanted me to cry until I learned my lesson, he wanted me to beg for mercy and apologize. But he knew better than to cause that kind of scene in such a public place.

Blake took a step closer to me and whispered, "You may have gotten away with this bullshit of yours this time, but I don't forget anything."

After he stormed out the front doors, I cowered into a corner and broke into uncontrollable shivers. The victory and the fear were too opposite for my emotions to handle at the same time. I was both fearless and fearful, triumphant and defeated, invincible and vulnerable. I had won this quarrel, but who knew if I would win the next one.

I lifted my shaking arm and checked my wristwatch. Knowing that Dean was waiting for me, I took a few breaths and tried to calm myself down. When I was ready, I got up, brushed the dust from my skirt and walked towards the library.

Once I was there, I spotted Dean, sitting at one of the wooden, square tables in the back. His head was bent over, his hands were in his lap, and his feet were elevated on the table. I slowly approached him, trying not to startle or disturb him too much.