Of New Beginnings - Anne with an E Fanfic

Arrival- Mi'inan

Mi'inan glanced up when they (finally) walked back over to his bench, then went back to his book.  "Took you two long enough." 

   Gilbert laughed.  "Come on, Mi'inan.  We should get going."

   Mi'inan looked up, his eyebrows raised and his mouth drawn. He placed his hand over his heart in a dramatic gesture.  "Oh, I'm sorry, am I making you wait?"

   Anne threw her head back and laughed.  Gilbert looked at her with an expression of infatuation, a small smile on his face.

   "We didn't really get a chance to properly meet earlier.  I'm Anne," she said, sticking her hand out for a shake.

   "Mi'inan," Mi'inan said, tentatively taking her hand.

   "I'm so glad to finally get to meet you!" she said enthusiastically.  "I imagined what your face would look like already, you know.  I must say, I was pretty close!  I didn't think you'd be so... pretty, though."

   Mi'inan's eyebrows shot up. "I...what?"

   "Oh, yes.  You must have figured it out by now.  Your face has an almost regal look to it, like you belong in an enchanted castle somewhere, casting spells and magic."

   "Er... thank you?" said Mi'inan.

   Anne nodded, took Gilbert's hand, and walked back carriage.

   Gilbert looked behind him and raised his eyebrows, as if to say "I tried to warn you!".

   Mi'inan shook his head in bewilderment, and walked after them, staying a careful few steps behind.

•••

Gilbert offered Anne a hand as she stepped into the carriage, lifting her skirt above the icy metal step.

She smiled, and gracefully entered the carriage.

She internally congratulated herself, for while she had many talents, being graceful was sadly not one of them.

Gilbert climbed in after her after tossing his bag onto the seat. His boots made a squelching sound as he, too stepped up into the cab. After Gilbert, Mi'inan gingerly placed his bag on the seat, and ever gingerly-er climbed into the carriage.

Off they went, the sun slowly rising over the new fallen snow, reflecting off the snow on the roofs, so that if you had been able to fly, you would have seen a city almost on fire with morning light.

Anne and Gilbert chatted merrily the whole way back to Aunt Jo's house, holding hands under the folds of Anne's skirt. They thought that they were being quite discreet, but any fool could have noticed.

Mi'inan read his book, which may sound lonely, but he was very happy to see Gilbert back with Anne, even though he'd never actually seen them together. The smile on Gilbert's face gave him more satisfaction than any conversation would. Besides, his book was very interesting. The gentle crunch of the horses hooves on snow was comforting, and everyone was content.

•••

By the time they got back to Aunt Jo's house, Mi'inan was almost done with his book. There were only a few pages left, and he wanted nothing more then to curl up in a corner and finish them. And that's what he intended to do.

He tucked the bookmark in his book, and the book into the bag, climbed out of the carriage, and he started the walk up to the house behind Anne and Gilbert.

Thoughts of his book were pushed to a corner of his mind, though, just by watching them. The way he held his arm out for her, and she tucked her hand into the crook of his elbow. The way she looked up at him and laughed, and how he looked so pleased and surprised whenever she did. How he never took his eyes off her, not once, for the entire walk up. How she leaned into him while she walked, as if she would topple right over if he left.

The sight of it made his heart ache. Not in a bad way, but not entirely in a good way either.

Seeing two people so completely and utterly in love is never an easy thing if you haven't been that way with someone before. It's as if the wanting fills you up, and even when you're full it just keeps coming and coming and coming, as it it will never stop until you've drowned.

For some people, it's easier than others.

But for Mi'inan, it was one of the hardest things he ever had to do.

Of course, he was happy for them. Gilbert was his friend, and he wished nothing but the best for him.

But at the same time, he wanted to curl up into a ball and sob. His stomach felt like someone was twisting it with a fork, around and around and around.

Nobody would ever love him like that.

A small part of him, a part buried very deep under years and years of sorrow and hatred, spoke up. But what if...?

No, no, he mustn't start. For if he did, he might never stop. Letdown was inevitable, he'd learned that time and time again.

Years and years of aghast faces flashes past his eyes as he trudged through the snow.

Broken.

Unworthy.

Not worthy of attention.

Not worthy of love.

Yes, was broken, and nobody could love a broken person.

He wrapped his arms around his middle and squeezed.

Best not to start hoping. Love wasn't something he could get.

•••

Anne marched up to the steps, tapping the tips of her boots on the steps to get the snow off.

She smiled at Gilbert, and at Mi'inan behind them.

She turned completely around to face Mi'inan , and put a hand on his shoulder.

He looked up, startled, as he had been staring at his boots.

"I know there's a lot of them, but I promise, they are some of the nicest people you will ever meet. I told them to try not to be too loud around you, as you're new. If any of them are unkind to you, come tell me, and I'll talk to them."

Mi'inan nodded, squinting up at her.

"Alright?" Gilbert asked. Mi'inan nodded again.

Anne turned around and knocked at the door.

One one thousand. Two one thousand. Three one thousand. Four one thousand.

The door creaked open.