I EXIST I EXIST I EXIST- Harry Potter Fanfiction(Marauders' Era)

Words, felt or not, are our greatest downfall

Fuck.

That was the only reaction Milena found appropriate for the letter she received from her Head of House to meet her, at 8 pm sharp in her office, to discus some ''disciplinary problems''. Can't she just say I fucking skip school?

Milena soon realised that it wasn't in the habit of Professor Sprout to call out her students in that manner, but, despite that, she continue to scrutinise the short sentences written on the squarish piece of parchment on her way along the corridors, trying to keep her mind away from the events of the day. What a marvellous thing a distraction is.

But, let's not mistake her need of a distraction for hatred towards the teacher. For a matter of fact, the respect the fifth year kept for the Herbology teacher is astounding in itself. And even if that won't stop her from playing truant from time to time or get in trouble for hexing some bastards, she most definitely knew when to stop. She knew that was what she could give in return for the fact that Professor Sprout was one of the few who stood up for her when the whole world was trying to bury her alive, and for that, she would be forever grateful.

Of course, knocking on her door and knowing her situation at hand wasn't a very praising position for Milena, but she tried to keep this thought aside and great the woman inside as politely as possible.

''Good evening, Professor.'' She said awkwardly at the sight of her Herbology teacher feeding a growling potted Chinese Chomping Cabbage.

''Oh, come in, Milena! I was just finishing with this one. Professor Slughorn is in need of some new potions ingredients as you see.'' Professor Sprout said, giving the small plant its last piece of diced carrot.

''Yes, I can figure as much.'' She said with a tint of shyness in her voice.

''Come sit, dear. Here.'' She woman with greying hair said pointing a string-knitted chair in front of the yellowish wooden desk covered by small plants and files.

''Thank you.'' She said taking the seat and looking at the tired teacher.

''Now. Milena, I presume you know why I asked you here?'' She asked with a still visible smile and growing pale eyes.

''Yes.'' She said finally not looking her Head of House in the eyes.

''Dear, you can't just skip school.'' She said with a sight. ''You have an important year ahead, you have OWL's to prepare for.''

''I know, Professor.'' She said with as much resignation.

''Look, Milena. I know you are a good student. Quiet frankly, one of my best. But you have to attend your classes.'' She said with an exhausted look. '' I was noticed by Professor McGonagall that you didn't come to Transfiguration. The same goes for Potions, Care of Magic Creatures and my own class. I do not intent to offer you detention, taking into account it is your first offence this year, the same goes for Professor Slughorn. But both Minerva and Professor Rabenstein informed me that this won't be the case. As for Professor Evergreen, he informed me that you left his class after quiet an outburst. Is that so?''

''Um, yes. It is.'' She said with a creeping anxiety raising in the pit of her stomach.

''Well, he informed me he won't press upon a punishment. But what really happened, Milena?''

''We had to fight a boggart.'' She said not raising her eyes so quietly that she was barely heard by the teacher.

''Oh, dear.'' She said with a realisation.

''It wasn't... The event of last year.'' She said knowing the expression of the teacher's face.

Are you confused too? Because her boggart wasn't the boy who dared to lay a finger on her? Or the darkness that engulfed the scene? The feeling of slowly suffocating under someone's hungry hand? You may have expected it. But, don't misinterpret her boggart as an absence of fear regarding the event.