Sorry I haven't updated in a while. How Katherine felt after Angel Archive's below! Sorry if it's short but I felt that it was necessary for this story that I showed Katherine's reaction. You might think it's over-dramatic but, she's a girl and way more observing. She can notice when Alex is trying to hide something, as she is his best friend, and just took things in a darker, more serious way.
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Katherine's POV:
What does it mean to be alive? Do all you have to do is breathe? What is considered officially dead? When you can no longer open your heavy eyes? I know a person.
Blood-streaked and pale.
They say he's not real. Just a figment of my wild imagination. But, he laughs and sings. And cries and hurts. All the things someone alive can do and feel...
Though, his skin is dead cold and his eyes without sparks. And he acts as though he is weighted down by some invisible force each day. But, he is so kind, so merry and nice...
That has to be real, right?
All of that can't have been my imagination.
He's my best friend, Alexander, and I know everything about him. We hang out every day together and slowly fall in love, or maybe that's just me. He lights up my world, gives me a purpose, and a reason to smile. But... there are somethings I don't know about him.
Like why he looked so distressed in the Angel Archive's at the mere mention of his possessions. And how he won't tell me anything about what it was like in Heaven or how father was doing besides a few short, 'okay's'. Or why, when he mentions that cursed nickname people called him, Drowned, he clenches his fists and his eyes blaze with a foreign emotion.
If, we were really best friends, shouldn't I know the answer to all of this? But, I've always never been confused when it came to Alex. Until yesterday at the Angel Archive's that is... I wish he'd tell me what was going through his head for once.
***
I sit on the the low-hanging roof right outside of my bedroom window, closing my eyes to feel the gentle, cool breeze against my face. I hadn't visited Alex today at the creek, which was a first in a long, long time, and it felt some what, wrong. I felt the urge to be by his side with each passing moment and a terrible tug of loneliness pulled at my heart as I realized... Alex had always been my only friend. And now... I wasn't sure what we were. We'd never talked about that one kiss, we'd let it pass by in the moment. But, maybe we should talk about it.
That was, if I could sort out my conflicting emotions. So many thoughts were going through my head, are you keeping secrets, is it too painful for you to talk, did you have anyone there for you in Heaven, are you lonely, am I... a bother to you now? Did that kiss... mess up any kind of friendship between us? Is it... all my fault? Have you only been doing all of this because father asked you to? Am I just an annoying brat you have to look after?
The more negative thoughts I began to have, the more my body started to shake and soon, I was sobbing on the roof, my head buried into my hands. I didn't care if it was the middle of the night and I could freeze to death. I didn't care that I might accidentally wake up mom. I didn't care that it was starting to rain, small drops that stung your skin. I just didn't care as I let myself fall into my dark thoughts. Even though it may seem stupid to someone that hasn't been in a situation like mine...
I loved Alex.
And without him life seemed so dull and depressing. Everything I'd done that morning had been a drag, as though I was watching my life play right in front of me, and I had moments where I would suddenly cry and rush into the bathroom.
"Alex...Alex." I whispered through the now heavy rain, my shirt now drenched and sticking to my pale bluish skin. But, I didn't care about any of that now. He'd been my light... and without him I was nothing... Without him, the path was dimmed and all I could see was the lonely blackness.
I feel more pressure onto my right arm but don't look up. The rain was probably getting bigger, faster... Pretty soon I would be dead and then, maybe I could really be with Alex. Maybe he wouldn't hide anymore secrets and we could be friends for the rest of eternity. Or... maybe something more.
Do you start to hallucinate when you get hypothermia? Because I'm positive I heard Alex's young, worried call. I start to laugh, hysterical, tears still stinging my eyes. I really was going to die. Maybe I was already dead... My body shakes with cold shivers and I hear his voice again, and this time, I just couldn't believe that it was a hallucination. "Katherine! What are you doing?!" I felt harder pressure to both my arms, to the point where it hurt, and slowly looked up to see Alex's bloody, rain-streaked face. His hair plastered onto his forehead, his eyes glistening with water, tears?
"Kat! Answer me! What the heck are you doing out here in the rain! You'll g-get s-sick or, or worse!" His eyes started to overflow with tears as he spilled out all his worries and concerns over me. Me. Katherine Richards. But, I was just me, right? I stared at him in shock as he continued to rattle on, his large blue wings flowing out to cover me up like a blanket as he gave me a big hug. Like if he let go, I would disappear in thin air. But, I was the one who was suppose to feel like that...
He was an angel.
I was a human.
He could leave me at any second...
So, shouldn't I save myself from the heartbreak? Go far away so I couldn't be hurt by this wonderful angel... I know I shouldn't fall in love but, it's too late. He's been my light. My friend. My saviour. I can't just pretend that kiss never happened and let things go back to normal. If we were closer, he'd tell me his secrets. He'd trust me enough to tell me...
So, without saying a word I leaned in closer, my head resting against his chest, listening for a nonexistent heart beat. And softly, like silk, I whispered. "I love you." I don't know if he heard me. I may have been too soft. Or he may have taken it the wrong way and just replied, 'I love you too', like it was nothing... But, I was content that I'd finally let those three small words slip out. And slowly, as my vision darkened and my eyes grew heavy, I flashed one last smile.
***
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Kay there was the chapter! You're welcome! That hurt my brain so much that I think I lost a million brain cells... But, I still did it. :) ACCOMPLISHMENT!!!
-I_Understand_it
