Fomalhaut [COMPLETED]

04|| Comfort Zone

It is basically a chore for me when it comes to eating lunch at school or even merely enjoying it. Eating by yourself sure is a sad thing since even if the food in front of you is good, you won't enjoy it nor savor it. Let's not forget the looks you'd get when you're all by yourself. I always eat by myself at my house so it's not something new to me but there are times where I actually resent people who have good relationships with others.  That's why I stopped bringing lunch with me to school. I lose my appetite whenever I look at the crowded cafeteria.

I walk out of the class to find Alexander standing by the entrance of the cafeteria waiting for someone. I shrug off the thought of who he might be waiting for when our eyes come into contact. He puts on a smile and walks towards me.

"Took you long enough. I've been waiting for you ever since the teacher left the class," he huffs.

"Sorry. I thought you were going to eat with your friends."

"You are a friend of mine too!" he exclaims.

It is strange. The fact that I, after all this time, have a friend. He isn't my friend alone but the idea of having a buddy to share my thoughts and relish my meals with is pleasant.

It always bothers me that as much as I don't want to get along with people, there's also a part of me that wants to have a friend to depend on. Bottling up all of my feelings deep inside of me is hard enough that it's no surprise that I want someone to understand me.

"You might not like it but would you mind sitting and having lunch with me and my friends?" he asks with hopeful eyes.

I look at him as if he grew another head.

"...I don't think I'm ready."

"If you don't want to say anything, you can just sit there. Sit next to me and I'll make sure no one will bother you," he suggests. The more the seconds pass, the more I see his confidence faltering.

I shake my head with a no.

"It's too much for me. I don't think I can handle it. Me talking to you alone is way out of my comfort zone. Besides, I'm quite sure your friends would rather spend time with you only and wouldn't appreciate an outsider intruding."

"You're not an outsider though. They won't mind. After all, they were the ones who asked me to invite you to sit with us when I told them I'd rather eat lunch with you."

I wanted to tell him so bad that they only asked for me to tag along because they wanted to spend more time with him. I'd assume they just wanted to get to know him better-being a new student and all-but decided not to argue back because of the look he is giving me. It is a mixture of nervousness and eagerness. He wants to get along with his friends but he also wants to spend time with me. I can't help but feel bad for being a hindrance.

After a few seconds of contemplation, I finally give in and nod, not wanting to ruin his first day at school.

It wouldn't hurt, would it?

I follow after Alexander as he approaches the table of his new friends and pulls out one of the chairs. He stands behind it while I give him a confused look.

"Sit," he demands and I do as told and he follows after and occupies the chair right beside mine.

"Hello," I greet awkwardly before I allow my eyes to roam around the school. Eye contact is not my strongest attribute. In fact, I can barely hold eye contact with anyone. The last time I did that was with my adoptive father who took some time to convince me to come out of my shell back in the day.

"Hello beautiful," one of the girls says. I raise my head to look at her and realize that she's Cassie Taylors, one of the popular students in Kingston High. Unlike these cliché movies where they make the popular girl at school be the stereotypical mean girl, Cassie is known as the nicest person you'll ever come across in this horrid place. In fact, the main reason she's popular is because she's nice to everyone. Her smile is so pretty that everyone can't help but stop in awe at the sight of it.

"You're Valentina Emerson, right?" she asks as she pushes her long, blonde curly hair from her face to look at me more clearly with her crystal blue irises. I nod as I fight the urge to avoid maintaining eye contact. I manage to hold contact for approximately two seconds before I look down.

I can't do this.

"Alexander said a lot of good things about you," another girl says. I also recognize this girl. She is Keira Blake, Cassie's best friend. She is absolutely gorgeous. Her dyed bright red curly hair, dark brown eyes and ebony skin are all factors that people here (including me) are normally jealous of. Whenever I look at her, I wish that I am her. I know that I'm not anywhere near unattractive and I know that I am a certain level of pretty. Detective Emerson used to always compliment my hazel eyes and long, wavy black hair that's as dark as the midnight. One thing's for sure though is that I'm as pale as a ghost which I'm not very fond of.

Now back to the point. I thought Alexander told me that I don't have to socialize so why isn't he doing anything to stop them? Is he having fun watching me tremble as if I'm a wet kitten?

"What kind of things?" I try to say in return. "We barely got to know each other," I joke. Cassie giggles.

"I'm sure you don't have any bad qualities," she smiles. I can't help but smile back.

Maybe I am grateful that she's trying to converse with me instead of ignoring my presence and only talking to the people she knows. It's very awkward when you're invited to sit with people you're not close with and they don't bother trying to involve you in their conversations. It makes you feel as if you're a weirdo sitting uninvitedly.

"I can tell that you're not really used to this yet but don't worry, we will give you as much time as you need for you to finally settle in and feel like opening up to us," Milo Davidson- Keira's boyfriend- says as he also sends me a smile. I nod in appreciation before I look towards Alexander who gives me a pleased smile.

"One step closer," he mouths and I nod in agreement.

"Also, why aren't you eating?" he asks as he narrows his eyes at me. I shrug.

"I'm not hungry."

"Now you are," he says before he shoves some fries in my face. I push his hand away and glare at him.

"Eat," he demands.

I shake my head.

"It's your food and like I already said, I'm not hungry."

I'm also not very comfortable in eating in front of people. I've always been self conscious of eating alone because it's not a good look to be a loner in front of people. However, I'm also not used to sitting with a group of people and eating with them. I'd feel awkward eating there while they're eyeing and judging me for the way I eat. All of this is out of the ordinary for me- something that I have yet to get used to.

"I don't care, you will eat that."

"No-" and he ends up stuffing two fries in my mouth. I roll my eyes as I chew on them while the rest of the table laughs.

"We only just met him but I think it's clear that he always gets his way," Cassie says while the rest nod. I smile and agree with them.

They should have made that an option when I was supposed to pick traits for him. I wouldn't have picked it.