immortality comes as seven [bts sickfics]

Suga || OCD 📗

Yoongi-OCD 2

Trigger Warning; Dark thoughts (Depression), self harm

Attention!! This will be one of the few chapters I talk about depression in, so please please read with caution.

~

The next chapter of this book will be a request, not and OCD chapter. Just in case you were expecting something else haha, also.... I'm kinda sad because the book emojis there are only four.. And this is more than likely going to be a 6 part series.. I wanted to use a book color per chapter lmao (I already have all the chapters planned out so umm, also I am not merging them unless I have to.)

But let's start the story why don't we?

~

"I need more, Hoseok. You you don't understand understand. I need more.."

"No Yoongi, it's not safe. We are going to get you help okay?"

"This is help, it's it's from the doctor. So it's supposed to to be good good."

"Yoongi, just because it's from the doctor doesn't mean you should take more than needed."

"I I need to to.. It's just just. It makes me feel better, and I I just want to feel feel better.."

His eyes loose contact with Hoseok's, now trailing off staring at the lamp on the end table beside the two. He pats his hand against his thigh, tapping it to a smooth rhythm. All the way up to 21. One more Yoongi, you know what will happen if you don't. So he does one more, and doesn't do anymore.

"I know baby, I know." Yoongi looks up again at Hoseok, nodding his head. Tears start to form in both of the boys eyes, Hoseok's looking more ready to fall than the older rappers'. Yoongi sheds a tear, but Hoseok stays tear free. The sunshine of the group, takes Yoongi in placing his head gently against his own chest. He grabs Yoongi's hand brushing his thumb against it, careful not to startle him more. The poor thing.

"You're okay. I'm okay. We're okay baby, okay?"

"No, you you not okay... So I- Yoongi protect you you."

"No shhhh- Yoongi doesn't need to protect me."

"Yes yes.."

The duo sits in complete silence for about 10 minutes before the silence being interrupted by soft snores.

"Cute." Hoseok says softly, careful not to wake up the sleeping one. Hoseok lays Yoongi down on his side, so that now he is comfortably laying on the couch not scrunched up into a little ball.

~

Hoseok's Pov

I just don't understand. When I first met Yoongi he was the most content, shy, and unruffled person. Out of all the members, he would be the first person I would come to for emotional problems. If I was feeling down, he would be the one to ruffle my hair and tell me it would be okay. He told me that everything was going to be fine, but now he's the one asking me for reassurance on everything. I just don't understand. I know there's something wrong with the chemical balance in his brain, but I just don't know why it had to pick me. I've seen him at his highest highs and his lowest lows. I've seen every side of him; I've seen his huge gummy smile when he is proud of himself, I've seen him jump up and down because he's excited. I've seen him clap his hands continuously until his hands turn red. I've seen the content sleeping Yoongi, where nothing can bother him.

But I've also seen the other side of him. I've seen him shoot awake from a nightmare. He'd wake up screaming and crying begging to be held. I was always the one to hold him. I would rock him back and forth pressing his head into my chest until the crying would stop. I would treat him like the little brother I never had. Even if he was older than me. I just, I just can't see him suffer. He would have mental breakdowns when he was just walking down the hall. I would hear him counting his steps, he would get 21 and then panic. And he would run down the hall to find me, he would come in running, talking so fast that I couldn't understand a word. He's come in crying and fighting anyone in his path to get to me, it's emotionally draining. Not only for him; but for me too. It's a lot, it's a lot to see your best friend obsess over you and be concerned for you every second of the day.