Where Do We Go from Here?

xiv.

     I hold the initial draft of my research paper requirement for my EIBC 201 class titled Ethical Standards amidst Relentless Fraud Pressures in Businesses while balancing it with my reading materials for my next class' accounting quiz. I take a fleet-footed brisk along the Dr. William Building of Sciences to meet the 10 o'clock deadline. 

     Every stride is an internal grunt and regret of why I never seem to manage my time. This scenario has been an all-too-normal occurrence in my Uni life which makes me think I should start accepting it as my reality; a reality of barely passing grades and buzzer-beater meeting of deadlines. 

     The soft and innocent rays of the sun peaks through the Victorian brick arcs lined up on my left and generously shines on the vast expand of brick wall on my right. 

     A tall man emerges from one of the arcs and blocks my way. It takes a few seconds for my eyes to adjust to the sudden shift of light. 

     "Not now," I say, finally realizing who it is. 

     A week's worth of exhausting every means possible to avoid Rocky after the incident is still not enough for the humiliation to disappear from my system. I know I should have apologized as soon as we got sober but embarrassment got the best of me and hiding is its advice.

     "Yeah, I think I gave you enough time already. Let's talk," he mutters. I take a side step and continue my mission to save myself from failing a class. 

     "I know, but not now," I insist slightly moving the baggage occupying both of my hands up. 

     "Here, let me take this." He stretches his arms and snatches two of the books I am holding. 

     "Thanks." It leaves my mouth as an incomprehensible whisper as utter guilt floods me. 

     I wake up from my current distraction as a bald lanky man in his senior years materializes from one of the intricately carved wooden doors on my right, a few meters away from me. I hear a gasp from myself as I run towards him. Taken aback, he takes a step back until he realizes it's just a student grasping for her uni life. 

     "Sorry Sir Bronte," I breathe, "Here's my paper for EIBC 201." I stretch my arms out, holding the thick bond of papers. 

     His eyes first look at Rocky, a quick confusion passes through his face. He trails his gaze to me then to the paper. He adjusts his black thick rimmed glasses and reads the title page as he takes it from my hands. 

     Finally with free hands, I look at my watch. "9:45, met the deadline, right?" I ask. 

     He wets his lips and nods. "As usual. Hmm.. Yes, I know you. Ms. Tan." He draws the page closer to his face. "I always enjoy the infographics within your research paper."

     "Oh, really. Thank you."

    "Yeah, the research itself usually needs some revisions. Now, if you'll excuse me," he remarks and nods as he turns his back to me. 

     I take a big breath and throw my back to the wall. 

     "Saved," I mutter. 

    "Now, can we talk?" He asks.

     "What is there to talk about?" I question. I take my books from him and pass through one of the arcs. 

     I don't think a few more days of passiveness might hurt us both. I just can't seem to face the truth that I can get dumber than this. Kissing a guy I barely know and finding out I mistook Rocky for Garith? That's just a new record for me; an all time low.