At Dusk

14

The longer I think about my fight with Dylan the more angry I get because he was right. Over the years I have put up walls to try protect myself from getting hurt by the people I care about but I think it made everything so much worse. It stopped me from ever truly connecting with someone because I was always scared one day they would just turn around and leave or hurt me with no warning at all. I don't want to be like that anymore. I want to fall in love and have deep meaningful conversations. I want to fall in love with being alive again.

Even though I know what I want I'm scared to act on it. I just lay here in my bed staring up at the roof trying to figure out what I'm going today. My thoughts swarm my head like a beehive and I just want it to stop. There is a gentle knock at the door and I sit up as I hear footsteps getting closer to the bed. I look to my left to see Oliver standing there.

"Hey," he smiles walking over and sitting down on the edge of my bed.

"Hey," I smile back, "what's up?"

"I know right now that you are pissed, pissed at everyone, pissed at the world, but you can't just cut Dylan out of your life forever. It's been three days, I get that the fight was bad but I can tell that he misses you and that you miss him even though you are hiding behind those walls you love so much. He gets you in ways Hayes and I can't and that's something you shouldn't give up on, he gets you to open up and you can't just cut a guy like that out of your life, you need to talk to him."

"You're right."

"I am?"

"Yes, you're right, he's right, I hate this, I feel like I'm going crazy."

"You're overwhelmed, so much has happened in such a short amount of time and you are just trying to find a way to deal with it and though it might not be the best way to do it, it's better then keeping it all bottled up inside and it's understandable."

As he talks he holds my hand and his eye contact doesn't waver, he wants me, he needs me to know what he's saying is important. That's one of the things I love about Oliver, he's always down to goof off and have fun but will always be serious when he has to and when he is everything he says is always true.

"You know you are a lot smarter than we give you credit for," I laugh

"Thanks, I steal all of my knowledge from Hayes," he jokes before leaving the room.

I stand up ready to face the music. I look myself over in the mirror at me simple outfit of black leggings and an oversized white button-up shirt that I have left the top buttons open. I take my hair out of the messy bun it was in and I toss it around letting it sit naturally. Music starts to creep into my room through the door as I roll up my sleeves. I walk out of the room to see Hayes and Oliver standing around the kitchen counter with Harrison and Spencer who I didn't know were here. They stand around eating pizza and chatting.

"Save me a slice," Dylan yells as he slides across the room grabbing a piece out of the box.

"Hey Cam," Harrison smiles when he see's me.

"Hi," I say confused as to why they are here as I take a slice of pizza.

"We are having a guys night, plus you obviously," Hayes fills me in when he notices my confused expression.

"Great, I get to experience guys night, lucky me, it's not like every night is guys night with you guys," I sarcastically laugh.

"Yeah you are replacing Jax because he has to babysit his little sister," Spencer informs me.

"Well I can assure you, I am a lot more fun than Jax," I smirk.

"I'm sure you are," Spencer smirks back staring me in the eyes waiting for me to look away but I refuse to be the first to budge.