𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐘 | 𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐌𝐈𝐍

𝐗𝐗𝐕𝐈𝐈

"so you weren't flirting or anything? he just kissed you?"

"yeah, i don't want to get into too much detail...i'm surprised you didn't see me try to get him off of me. i just wanted to give you your space but i can't help but wonder where we stand now. it's driving me insane." now jaemin was scared. of course he knew what he wanted but he needed to know if renjun wanted it too.

"i think..." in the time the two stayed apart, renjun hadn't really thought about that. he didn't even know how to feel. he really loved jaemin but every time he looked at him or even heard his voice or his name, his heart broke all over again. "i think we should give it some more time. i don't mean we avoid each other with this tension, but i don't think i could go back to where i was with you before. not for a while." it hurt renjun to say that, but it was for the best. what hurt the latter even more was the look on jaemin's face.

"i understand." he replied. he could just feel his throat getting dry, "just please know that i'm here for you. with whatever you need, whenever...i'll wait for you." he said the last part quietly to himself.

renjun nodded, not hearing his last few words. he stood up and extended his hand awkwardly. he would give him a hug but he knew if he did, he would give in. jaemin hesitantly took his hand, shaking it. the silence between them was deadly as renjun made his way out and jaemin struggled to let go of his hand. but he had to, anything for renjun. as long as he was happy.

—

"i'm so stupid! what was i thinking then? i can't handle this!" renjun was close to ripping out his blonde strands. ten and haechan comforted him while they sat in the break room. he had just told them what he and jaemin discussed and he was regretting every word.

"it was a big step to even go talk to him, ren. don't be so hard on yourself." haechan said. renjun wiped the tears falling from his face as he nodded.

"why didn't you just tell jaemin exactly what you've been telling us? that you still love him but you need time to get to that stage of your relationship." how did ten know all the right answers? renjun thought. even if he planned out their conversations and knew all the right words to say, he knew he would forget everything as soon as he approached the younger.

"it's not that easy..." renjun sighed. ten and haechan both knew it wasn't easy but they had to keep reminding renjun that it's possible just by talking things out. everyone knows communication is key but it can easily slip your mind when it comes to a situation like this.

"i know." ten and haechan said in unison. which resulted in ten and renjun giving the latter a strange look. "what? i struggle to voice out my opinion with the person i'm interested in too."

"haechan struggling to share his opinion? in what universe?" ten laughed sarcastically.

"wait? since when were you interested in someone?" renjun asked, interrupting ten's laughter. the tanned male turned beet red. "we've been worried about jaemin and i all this time, and we didn't even bother to take interest in your love life. i'm sorry."

"no, no! i was too embarrassed to say anything anyways..."

"okay, so who's the guy?" ten asked, cutting straight to the chase. this sort of thing always reminded renjun of high school, not that he was complaining. he too, was curious right with ten.

"so you just assume it's a guy?" haechan argued, crossing his arms over his chest. ten rolled his eyes, it was obvious the younger was stalling.

"it definitely wouldn't be a girl. who are you trying to fool?" haechan looked away, fidgeting in his seat. "don't tell me it's someone at the office!" ten put his hand up, not wanting haechan to say anything. haechan's face was enough to give them their answer.

"please, tell me they're the same rank as us. we can't handle anymore shenanigans right now." renjun squeezed his eyes shut, anticipating haechan's next few words.

"you guys know...mark?"

"aww, come on!"

"are you kidding me?" the two yelled, haechan flinched at the sound of their outbursts.

"i'm sorry! this is why i didn't wanna tell you." haechan covered his face. he just knew he shouldn't have said anything about mark. this was exactly why he stayed silent. he just couldn't help himself, i mean come on. look at him.

—

jungwoo sent lucas off to work while he stayed home. he knew it wasn't the best idea considering it was his first week at the office, but it was definitely for a good reason. his friend had come over for comfort and advice yet again that week, and jungwoo was always open to giving the younger male just that.

"i'm sorry i keep bothering you, jungwoo." the younger male said while entering the luxurious house, shutting the door behind him. jungwoo smiled and shook his head.

"no problem, jeno. what's the matter?"

"i don't know if i can keep the job you got me. it's nice and all, but i have no passion for serving food at a restaurant." jeno explained while the two made their way to the couch. after quitting his job at the department, he knew he couldn't waste any time in getting another job. luckily he ran into jungwoo who had faced the same thing years before.

"oh come on, you'll get used to it."

"i doubt it. my friend, chenle, already works there as one of the cooks. it just had to be someone i knew. not to mention he's loud." jeno cringed at the memory of chenle yelling and laughing in jeno's ear every time he messed something up. chenle and jeno weren't too close after what he did to renjun, but they still got along.

"you're thinking about coming back, aren't you?" jungwoo questioned. jeno looked a little uneasy since jungwoo was able to read his mind so quickly. he knew he couldn't go back to the department, everyone most likely hated him. "what's on your mind?"

"renjun is. i feel terrible, jungwoo. i threw our friendship away all because of my own insecurities. i didn't know what i was thinking." hot tears welled up in jeno's eyes but he quickly wiped them away. he shouldn't be crying, not after what he put renjun through.

"say that to him. you guys might not be friends again but you need to let him know that you're already aware of that. just apologize to him." jeno shook his head. jungwoo was only trying to be helpful but jeno didn't think he understood.

"do you know what i said to him that day? i told him that he now knows how it feels to lose his happiness. hell, i would hate myself too! i said it straight to his face despite him sobbing in front of me." jeno buried his face in his arm, still trying to stop the tears from falling. jungwoo engulfed the aforementioned into a hug.

"jeno, you have to do what makes you happy and hold your head high. if that means going back to the department, go for it. but you know you have to apologize to renjun either way." jungwoo advised as he rubbed circles on the younger's back, "trust me, i know how it feels to be hated."