Revived

Chapter 4

Chapter 4 - Pulse

December 20

I couldn’t move. My limbs felt weighed down and my head was pounding. I didn’t want to think. I didn’t want to face it. I didn’t want to get up. I clutched the fabric around my heart. It wouldn’t stop hurting. The room was so dark. The sun was probably not up yet.

“Georgie.” He whispered.

I choked as his voice invaded my mind again. I didn’t want to think of him. I didn’t want to hear his voice. I didn’t miss his touch. I didn’t miss his kisses. Bitter tears rolled down my face and my tongue lapped the salty substance subconsciously. I wasn’t fooling anyone. I missed everything about him. I missed him. So much that it hurt. Giving up on facing it, I fell back into the frequent slumber I had going on.

December 23

I scrambled to the side of my bed, body half hanging, as I opened the mini fridge and grabbed the ice cream carton. Tearing the lid off, I dug the existing spoon into the mint chocolate ice cream and shoved the cold minty goodness into my mouth. It was funny. I used to hate mint chocolate. Now it was my favourite. Sighing, I curled into a ball, sucking on the metal spoon.

December 25

I crinkled my eyes, the residue of my tears making it difficult to open my eyes and move my face. Puffy eyelids are the hardest things to see through. I hadn’t changed for days. Maybe I should change. Nah. Who am I trying to impress anyway. I didn’t want to see anyone. The pain was not any number. My hand reached for my phone on the side dresser. One message from Anna.

12:09 Anna: You sure you don’t want to come to the Christmas party?

My fingers hovered over the keyboard.

14:36 Me: Is he there?

The answer was immediate.

14:06 Anna: Nowhere to be seen.

I bit my lip. I didn’t want to get up. But he wasn’t there. I wouldn’t have to face him. Maybe it was time to get up. It had been 5 days.

14:08 Me: Nah. I like my bed better.

14:08 Anna: I won’t rush you. Stay in bed if you don’t wanna come.

14:08 Me: Yes ma’am.

I shut my phone off and collapsed into my bed again, cocooning in the covers. Would I ever get over this?

December 29

“I can’t believe you’re finally up.” Anna snorted loudly through the phone.

“Yeah.” I sighed, walking along the empty corridor of the Xenia Goodwin Academy. It had been so long since I’ve last set foot in here. Wedging my phone in between my head and shoulders, I bundled my messy hair into a bun, pushing bobby pins in as I walked.

“You’re weird, you know.” Anna sighed, the vibration tickling the side of my face.

“How.” I challenged as my feet tapping softly against the wooden floors. Nostalgia hit me in the chest. I missed this place so much.

“Well, you are cheated on by a guy you’ve known for years, you don’t cry, you cry suddenly and very dramatically, you wake up hours after and you have the heart to joke with me, then you fall into a mood for almost two weeks, change your favourite ice cream flavour, miss Christmas eve, Christmas, boxing day, and now you’re telling me you’ve gotten up.” She ranted.

“I’m crazy?” I offered sheepishly, tugging at the straps of my dark green leotard under my white silk jumper. I pulled up my black tights and held my phone with my hand.