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"cunt." I replied, "and that's just off the top of my head." Everyone looked at me shocked. "What? Just because everyone thinks I'm perfect 1. doesn't mean I am and 2. doesn't mean I can't swear." Silence. Well that shut them up. "Well hey Sporto! What'd you do to get in here? Forget to wash your jock?" Bender continued. "Uh, excuse me, fellas? I think we should just write our papers..." Johnson said nervously. "Look, just because you live in here doesn't give you the right to be a pain in the ass...so knock it off!" the jock said, ignoring Johnson. "It's a free country..." Bender continues. This is some bullshit I can't be bothered with. "He's just doing it to get a rise out of you! Just ignore him..." Claire advised, I think Claire has just learnt what testosterone does - finally. I mean it does some other things but she probably won't know about that till she's wed. "Sweets...you couldn't ignore me if you tried!" Bender insists completely truthfully. Claire rolls her eyes. "So...so! Are you guys like boyfriend/girl- friend?" he pauses, "Steady dates?" he pauses again, "Lo--vers?" he pauses again, "Come on Sporto, level with me. Do you slip her the hot...beef... injection?" Claire and sporto turn to face Bender, infuriated. "Go to hell!" Claire screams. "Enough!" jock yells. Shits gonna hit the fan now.
"Hey! What's going on in there?" Vernon shouts through to us. I roll my eyes. Bender stands up and walks over to the railing and sits on it. "What do you say we close that door. We can't have any kind of party with Vernon checking us out every few seconds." He says. Solid plan so far. "Well, you know the door's s'posed to stay open..." Brian complains. "So what?" Bender asks. "So why don't you just shut up!" sporto yells. "There's five other people in here you know..." "God, you can count. See! I knew you had to be smart to be a...a wrestler.." Bender states sarcastically. "Who the hell are you to judge anybody anyway!" sporto asks. "Really" Claire supports, and slowly I start to realise that this is turning into Cinderella.... which unfortunately means I'm the evil step mother through process of elimination. "You know, Bender...you don't even count. I mean if you disappeared forever it wouldn't make any difference. You may as well not even exist at this school." sporto said. Bender looks... sad? I mean at that point you've gotta wind your neck in right? "Whoa, whoa, whoa. That was harsh... and then some." I stated. "Well...I'll just run right out and join the wrestling team." Bender sarcastically remarks. Then sporto and Claire look at each other and laugh. Why are the attractive ones always assholes? "Maybe the prep club too! Student council..." he continues. "No, they wouldn't take you." sporto insists "How would you know? I'm the Student Council President not you." I remark, I mean I might think that he's attractive but I'm not gonna let him get away with being an ass. Bender chuckles. "I'm hurt." he says, faux sadly.
"You know why guys like you knock everything" Claire begins. I hear Bender muttur, to himself "Oh, this should be stunning." "It's 'cause you're afraid." She finishes. I snort with laughter. She and sporto looks at me. "What?" I ask. "Oh, God! You ritchies are so smart, that's exactly why I'm not heavy in activities!" Bender remarks. "You're a big coward!" Claire argues. And she's being a big asshole what's the difference. I look behind me and notice Brian feels left out; and then he starts listing clubs he's in so I turn back to the conversation between Bender and Claire "See you're afraid that they won't take you. You don't belong so you just have to dump all over it..." Claire speaks. "Well...it wouldn't have anything to do with you activities people being assholes...now would it?" Bender replies. "Hey!" everyone looks at me in judgement "I'm the nicest bitch in here." Everyone nods in agreement. "Well you wouldn't know. You don't even know any of us." Claire argues. "Well, I don't know any lepers either, but I'm not gonna run out and join one of their fucking clubs." He counters. "Fair point." I nod. "Hey let's watch the mouth, huh?" Sporto requests. "And I'm the fuckin' angel." I muttur, so nobody can hear.
Then I hear Brain babbling on again behind me. "S'cuse me a sec, what are you babbling about?" Bender questions. "Well, what I said was; I'm in the math club, the Latin club and the physics club." He stutturs. Bender nods and turns to Claire. "Hey...Cherry...do you belong to the physics club?" He asks. "That's an academic club..." She argues. "So?" He quizzes. She counters "So...academic clubs aren't the same as other kinds of clubs." "Oh, but to dorks like him," He points at Brain "they are." I nod in agreement. "What do you guys do in your club?" I ask, slightly curious. "In physics, um, we ah, we talk about physics...about properties of physics." Brain rambles. "So it's sorta social...demented and sad, but social. Right?" Bender concludes. "Yeah, well, I guess you could consider it a social situation. I mean there are other children in my club and uh, at the end of the year we have, um, you know, a big banquet, at the, uh, at the Hilton." Brain babbles, I sorted at children not gonna lie. "You load up, you party..." Bender begins. "Well, no, we get dressed up...I mean, but, we don't...we don't get high." Brain rambles, again. "Only burners like you get high..." Claire says, to Bender. "And, uh, I didn't have any shoes. So I had to borrow my dad's. It was kinda weird 'cause my mom doesn't like me to wear other people's shoes. And, uh, my cousin Kent...my cousin Kendall from, uh, Indiana... He got high once and you know, he started eating like really weird foods. And uh, and then he just felt like he didn't belong anywhere. You know, kinda like, you know "Twilight Zone" kinda." Brain tells us. "Sounds like you..." Claire tells Bender.
"Look, you guys keep up your talking and Vernon's gonna come right in here...I got a meet this Saturday and I'm not gonna miss it on account of you boneheads..." sporto complains. And I had a shopping trip planned for today you win some you lose some "Oh and wouldn't that be a bite." Bender remarks, letting out a moan of faux agony. "Missing a whole wrestling meet!" "Well you wouldn't know anything about it, faggot! You never competed in your whole life!" sporto moans. But lemme get this straight first, he can use that f word but if Bender says 'fucking' you go off, right? (A/N the real hypocrisy though) "Oh, I know...I feel all empty inside because of it. I have such a deep admiration for guys that roll around on the floor with other guys!" Bender says in faux sadness. "Ahhh, you'd never miss it. You don't have any goals." Sporto insults - neither do you you're a wrestler not a footballer. "Oh, but I do!" Bender states, I lean forward - intrigued. "Yeah?" sporto asks equally intrigued. "I wanna be just--like--you! I figure all I need's a labotamy and some tights!" Bender reveals. TIGHTS? "You wear tights?" Brian asks intrigued. "No I don't wear tights, I wear the required uniform..." sporto denies. "Tights." I clarify. "Shut up!" sporto says, defensively. "Make me." I dare. (A/N Get your mind out of the gutter)
