strawberry ghost | changlix ff ✔

seven - regret

weeks have past and the ghost has been in and out of changbin's body. the boy started getting used to it but something just didn't sit right with him. he suspected the ghost of using him for his body.

it was a sunday night, felix just got out of changbin's body. the ghost smiled, looking at the older while waiting for him to catch his breath.

"felix lee..." changbin made felix confused and nervous with the tone of his voice and him, calling him with his full name instead of his nickname.

"y-yes? hm? yes, hyung?"

changbin sat up and turned to felix. "answer truthfully." he stared deeply at felix right at the eyes.

felix started to sweat nervously due to the intense tension.

"are you using me for my body?"

felix's lips parted to take shaky breathes, speechless, not knowing what to answer but he knew he wasn't using the boy for his body.

"i knew it." changbin was about to stand up and leave but the ghost grabbed his wrist. "wait, no..."

felix pulled changbin down to sit on the bed. "i'm not!-" the angered boy interrupted him.

"shut up, stop lying!" he shouted. "i swear! i'm not lying!" the ghost cried out.

the boy was so mad but the hurt took over his emotions so that he couldn't hold in his tears anymore. he cried but turned away so felix couldn't see him cry.

the ghost felt weak and let go of the hurt boy's hand. changbin fell to the ground, crying with unsteady breathes.

felix just stared at changbin crying on the floor, not knowing what to do cause he knows that once he speaks a word, the boy would get even madder so he decided to stay quiet.

changbin got enough strength to stand up and run to his closet to change his clothes.

"i thought we were friends" changbin cried at the thought as he finds a hoodie to wear.

changbin ran out of the apartment, leaving the ghost heartbroken, feeling guilty.

"i'm sorry." the ghost whispered to the empty apartment.

-

two hours have past and changbin was walking along the sidewalk of the han river bridge, listening to the water, engines of some cars that pass by, and the few high school students happily walking and talking in groups.

he went to the han river cause the river never failed to calm him down when he was on his lowest.

he shreds a few tears while his phone blows up from text messages and calls but he ignored them all. he got a few stares from the people who walked past him.

he couldn't believe how stupid and blind he was about the ghost. 

he regrets ever letting the ghost in his body, he regret meeting the ghost, he regrets moving into that apartment, he regrets moving out.

if only he wasn't kind enough to the ghost, if only he was too afraid of the ghost that he wouldn't even look at him, if only he picked a different apartment, if only he stayed with his parents, if only, if only, if only.

"FUCK YOU!" even if he looked insane to the public, he didn't care, he just wanted to release all his feelings and emotions. "I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!"

he felt like his body melted and hung his arms on the rails of the bridge.

he felt overwhelmed happiness that he could release his feelings that he started laughing but also tearing up. "fuck you..." he whispered as he grinned.

he fell to the ground, smiling, feeling sleepy.

eventually, he fell asleep on the sidewalk of the han river bridge.

-

"YAH!! CHANGBIN HYUNG!!!" changbin heard a voice that woke him up from his slumber.

the boy furrowed his eyebrows, rubbing his eyes. he yawned as he looked around to see who was calling him.

he saw a blurry figure running towards him. he squinted his eyes to see who it was. then he realized, it was his best friend, hyunjin.

"what are you doing here?!" changbin said in shock, he worried cause his friend is probably tired from coming to han river, all the way from seoul.

"i was looking for you and you weren't answering my texts or calls so i guessed something happened so i looked in your apartment but no one was there at all and when something seriously sad happens, you go here so i went here." hyunjin explained everything.

"god, you shouldn't have come all the way here." changbin said as he stretched his arms. "yeah, yeah, get up, it's two o'clock." hyunjin rolled his eyes, trying to pull changbin up to stand up.

changbin groaned while hyunjin pulls his arm. "yah, yah, yah, i'll get up by myself." he got frustrated by the taller boy.

-

again, the two boys were at the cafe they always go to.

"so, you think the ghost, you like, used you for your body?" hyunjin asked for confirmation. "i don't like him." the annoyed boy clenched his teeth.

"well obviously, now you don't, but before" his best friend argued.

"i never liked him." changbin slammed his hands on the table. 

"yeah, cause you would lend anyone your body." hyunjin sarcastically said.

"no." changbin mumbled as he crossed his arms.

the younger boy made a devilish smile.

"well, i don't like him now." he looked away, avoiding eye contact.

"that's what i said." his friend gave him a confused look. "but he used you so, you should stay away." hyunjin sipped his tea.

"okay, okay."