I don't understand

The end?

As much as he tried to avoid them, headlines about him, one direction and of course Larry Stylinson, seemed to follow him around. Newspapers and magazines alike speculated that one direction’s supposed vacation was actually the end of the band, that Larry Stylinson had broken up and things had become too awkward for the band to continue (this one hit rather too close to home), that Harry was currently suffering from depression, that Niall had stopped eating (that one surely couldn’t be true!) and even that Louis had been the one to crash into Harry’s car-on purpose-in a fit of jealous rage.

Louis had tried, god damn it he had tried so hard. Tried to continue his friendship with the boys, his brothers. He’d seen them a couple of times, he’d even bumped into Harry once, but it just became all too much. They smiled and joked and pretended not to notice how torn apart and broken they all seemed, how all the light had seemed to seep out of the world when One Direction ended. But it wasn’t the same, their easy go lucky behaviour had ended, their easy camaraderie gone. His brief meeting with Harry just ended in both of them crying for days on end; Louis because of how badly he wanted Harry and how guilty he felt, seeing Harry looking so skinny and lost, Harry because he didn’t know how to cope without Lou. 

It all came to a head one day when Simon called them. He said there was too much speculation about whether the band was breaking up or not and the fanbase had gone crazy. They needed to put the rumours to rest once and for all. And if this meant One Direction was over? Well Simon would be gutted but they had had a great few years together, and maybe they’d get to work together in the future sometime.

Louis was already seated in Simon’s office, absurdly nervous even though he knew what answer they were giving, with Zayn when Niall, Liam and Harry walked in. Well Liam and Niall walked in, but they were practically having to prop Harry up. He looked so...lifeless. And broken.

Simon sighed heavily, “I know you didn’t want to tell me exactly what went on between all of you, but I’m sorry boys we can’t continue. We either have to move on from this, or if that’s not possible, it’s going to have to be the end of One Direction. It’s just...it’s not healthy for you all to be in so much pain. You need to move on.” Louis’ hands found Niall and Zayn’s under the desk and he clutched them tightly. He guessed a small part of him had always secretly thought they would have been able to work it out and continue with One Direction.  He didn’t want it to be the end... but he couldn’t see any other way. He just couldn’t be around Harry, it just wasn’t a possibility. The press would see straight through them: they all knew neither was a great actor.

There was a long painful pause, where no one wanted to say the inevitable words, the words that would break them apart.

Finally Liam looked across at Louis who nodded painfully. Liam opened his mouth to speak but Harry, having caught the glance, exploded.

“This is NOT fucking happening!” Harry seethed, cheeks flushing with anger as he glared at Simon and then all the boys in turn. “The band is going to end without anyone fucking telling me why!? Because I fucking did something I don’t remember to,” Here Harry had to take a deep breath in order to say his name without his voice quavering, “Louis and he won’t forgive me. What the fuck is wrong with you all.”

Louis had had enough, “Fuck off Harry! You have no idea how much pain you caused me!”

“Because you won’t fucking tell me anything!” Harry screamed, “How am I supposed to go back to my life before one direction, and lose the person who means the most to me in the world when I don’t even know why I’m losing them!? How is that fair Louis? How?!” He demanded, chest heaving with exertion, unsteady on his feet.

“Alright, you really want to know what happened!? I told you I was in love with you. I thought you felt the same way.” Louis’ eyes bored into Harry’s, bright, hurt and honest.