I don't understand

Reunion

Louis sat on his couch, alone, staring blankly at the tv. He seemed to end up here a lot. He used to love watching tv and movies and snuggling on the couch...with Harry. But now, he could barely function. He’d spark that made life seem beautiful; everything was hard and less colourful without...Harry around. It hurt to even say his name.

Louis’ phone started blaring, startling him out of his depressive thoughts. He sluggishly fumbled for his phone, his heart lurching uncomfortably when he saw Liam’s name and smiling picture flashing on his screen. He’d barely talked to the boys since he’d left, he just couldn’t stand to be around any of them anymore. It hurt too much. It could be important...it could be about Harry. Louis took a deep, soulful sigh before pressing the accept button and holding the phone to his ear.

“Lou?” Even the sound of Liam’s voice hurt; he missed him so much. He wanted daddy direction back. He wanted them all back...he just couldn’t. Not after what happened with Harry.

“Yeah, it’s me Liam.” The phone crackled for a minute and Louis thought he heard Liam trying to calm someone down. “What’s going on?” His heart was pounding in his chest, the suspense was near killing him.

“It’s Harry...he uh-he’s woken up, Lou.” Louis took a sharp stuttering breath and dug his nails into his thighs, trying desperately to hold himself together.

“That’s...um, good.” His voice was thick with emotion.

“He’s asking for you Lou.” That one sentence completely rocked Louis’ world. He stood up violently, the remote control clattering to the floor. What was he going to do?

Louis took a deep breath-it was too soon. He couldn’t see Harry, not now. He uttered one of the hardest sentences he’d ever had to force through his lips, “I don’t want to see Harry.”

Louis heard Liam swear on the other end and his eyebrows lifted, that was not like daddy direction at all. “Please, I’m trying my best Harry.” Liam sounded like he was about to cry, his tone was so desperate and Louis could barely stand the thought of Harry being on the other side of the phone. “Please Louis, please, he’s begging for you...we need you.”

Louis closed his eyes and let a tear drop down his face. “Ok, I’ll be there soon.”

*~*

Louis walked through the hospital door barely 30 minutes later and was directed upstairs. He was shaking heavily, having to force his legs to make each step. The lift doors pinged open and for a second, time stopped, as he locked eyes with his ex-band mates who were slouched in chairs. They looked like hell. But then again, he didn’t think he looked much better. Then he was in their arms and they were all crying and squeezing and talking at once. He needed them like he needed air, they were his happiness. How was he going to leave again?

Louis’ knees gave way when he heard Harry’s hysterical voice just behind the wall, and Niall’s arm around his waist was the only thing holding him up, the only thing anchoring him to this world. “Go away! Get me Boo, I need him, I need him not you. Stop it!” Harry’s voice was hysterical and desperate and...lost.

“I think you should go to Harry Lou.”

Niall’s voice was gravelly and almost unrecognisable to Louis. His heart clenched painfully and he fisted his hand into Niall’s top, “I don’t think I can.”

“He needs you. We all do.” Liam’s voice sounded on the edge of tears again and Louis couldn’t stand. He peeled his fingers away from Niall and shakily straightened up, completely terrified out of his mind.

“Will you come with me?” He whispered, eyes locked on the door that contained Harry. They nodded and with Zayn’s hand on his back Louis managed to push down the door handle and walk into the room.

His eyes immediately zoomed in on Harry. Harry, whose curl’s had lost their life, whose eyes had no joy or laughter in them and whose body seemed frail and weak. He was struggling frantically, trying to push both the nurse and his mother off at the same time. Louis felt his heart break in that second.

Then Harry’s eyes met his and his heart was mended.

The second Harry’s saw Louis his countenance changed completely. His eyes suddenly gained life and meaning and warmth and his body flopped, exhausted into the bed. But the next second he had flown out of bed and thrown himself into Louis’ familiar arms. Louis stumbled backwards with the weight of Harry and was at a complete loss of what to do as Harry sobbed into his chest, his hands scratching and clawing and grabbing Louis as he tried to hold onto him as tightly as he could. Then Harry’s lips started making frantic movements over any part of Louis that was unclothed, working their way up his neck and his jaw line.

“They told me you weren’t coming. They said we didn’t talk anymore. I don’t understand Boo, I don’t understand.” Harry cried brokenly, moulding his body to Louis and desperately trying to be a part of him.

Louis looked around helplessly, gaining no aid from anyone but the nurse who mouthed to ‘calm him down’. Louis hesitantly ran his hand through Harry curls’, the first time he’d done that familiar motion in over 3 months, and he thought his knees would buckle again when the pain of his love shot through him. Louis tried to sit down but Harry began to get hysterical again and the nurse shook her head frantically, gesturing to Harry’s head.

“Don’t go, don’t ever leave me,” Harry sobbed brokenly, his fingers digging into Louis’ hips painfully in his fraught attempt to allow no space to become between them.

“It’s ok Haz, I’m not going anywhere, I’m just sitting down, it’s ok.” Louis cooed gently, guiding them backwards to the plastic seat that was at the edge of Harry’s bed. As soon as Louis’ bum hit the edge of the seat, Harry crawled into his lap and wrapped all of his limbs around Louis so he physically could not get any closer to him. He dropped his head to his favourite crook in Louis’ neck and started nuzzling the warm skin there, the dryness of his lips melding with the wetness of his tears.

Louis buried his head in Harry’s curls and finally let himself cry. He let out all the hurt, all the pain, all the gut-wrenching sobs that he should have shed over these past 3 months into his ex-best friend and love of his life’s shoulder.

The nurse seeing the two boys utterly wrapped up in each other, shuffled the rest of the boys and Harry’s mum out of the room, hoping that this boy, Louis, could help mend Harry.