Things Nigerian Mums Do

When you sit beside your mum in church.

My sincerest apologies to everyone for my laziness to write a  new chapter. Its just that................ Okay,I honestly don't have an explanation but just accept my apology.......... It comes from the bottom of my bed,just joking,it comes from the bottom of my heart.😂😁😁😁😁

Enjoyyyyyyyy.............

There came a day my mum and I went for a midweek service in church.
Trust me,I always respect myself when sitting beside her,because any wrong move my own has finished that day.

So,that day I decided to sit beside her and a friend of mine. And me being me,I decided to start talking to my friend. Well,it was not yet time for the sermon and they were taking testimonies and making announcement so,I started talking.

First,I felt my mum kick me but I thought it was a mistake and continued talking.
When the announcements were over,I was still talking with my friend,only for my mum to pinch me. I was about to squeal but I remembered we were in church so I just swallowed it.

I faced her only for her to give me the 'look'. There and then I just kept my mouth shut. And the gist was just getting interesting,but for me to hear the gist in a hale and hearty condition,I just had to keep shut.

I just had to signal my friend to gist me later. So,when the service was over my mum started........

Mum: When I kicked you why didn't you keep quiet?
Me: Mum,I thought you kicked me mistakingly. I'm sorry mum.
Mum:what were you talking about that you couldn't wait for another day.
Me:I'm sorry mum.
Mum: That's not what I asked you.
Me:* starts playing with my fingers* Nothing mum. I'm sorry.
Mum:Sorry for yourself. Mtchewww.

The next midweek service I didn't sit beside my mum,instead I sat with my friend. See,I only get to see this friend during church services and the gist was still pending,so I sat beside her.

Don't get me wrong,I don't talk for most of the church services but when its time for testimonies and announcements, I talk.

So my friend started filling me in on the gist during the announcement session.
I sat far from my mum,like six rows before her.

When the announcements were coming to an end,I began talking. Only for me to feel a tap on my shoulder. When I turned to see who tapped me,the person was like.......

Person: Sorry to disturb you.
Me: Mhm?
Person: The person behind me told me to tap you and tell you to keep quiet.

So I turned to look at the person. Then the guy turned his head,and pointed at a lady behind him. And I was like who on earth decided to prank me today.
Then the lady behind him turned to the person behind her.
That's how,six rows back I saw my mum and she was like ' shhhhhh' .

Oh my lord!!!! My mum had to tell six people to tell me to keep shut. Its as though she has some sort of eagle vision because I intentionally sat six rows away from her to avoid that situation.

It has been settled..... Nothing can be hidden from Nigerian mums. Its just the truth.

Thank you all for reading.
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