Things Nigerian Mums Do

When you spoil the water heater😁😁

I spoilt the water heater.......hold on ...... I've spoilt a lot of things but I think I should be called................The Indestructible Ultra Destroyer. Ok, that sounds like one of Doofishmirts' (from Phineas and Ferb) inventions,my bad!

As I was saying....since I spoilt the heater,my mum has been on my case. Well not actually,but it went down like this.

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On a Monday morning,5:30am,I was getting ready to take a shower,so I switched on the water heater. It takes a little time to heat up,so I left the bathroom to lay down on my bed.
I don't like being woken up around 5 in the morning,its deprivation of good sleep. But I can agree to 5:55am,sometimes. But this is Monday and my mum,hmm,I can't talk sha!!!!

6:20am,I found myself waking up,I didn't remember falling asleep,but I know I was lying on my bed,only for me to feel someone pinching me. Whether in reality or in dreamland,I knew for sure,that it was my mum's doing. So I woke up,to find my mum looking at me as if I'd done something terrible.
You see,sometimes my mums facial expressions are very........unreadable. So I don't really know if I'm in trouble or not.

My mum was still looking at me and two things came to mind.
1. I run for my life before she thinks of what to do to me.
2. I just accept whatever she's planned to do to me. After all,its not as if she's going to kill me.😕
So number1 was my only way,because,I didn't want to cry😀😀. Just as I was about to execute my little plan,I smelt something,it smelt like a fried appliance, no offence.😑

Then,I remembered, I left the water heater on. Eeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwooooooooooo!!!!😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱
My mum would totally fry me in a pot of stew😁😁😁😁😁
Now my little mission to escape has been ruined,there was definitely no way I could get out of there,so I just decided to put on my pleading face. I hope this works.😖😖

Mum: I don't understand you ooohh. How can you turn on the heater and then go back to sleep. This is the height of laziness, Ahah!!! Just to turn on the heater and take a shower,you spoilt the heater. No problem, since its your own bathroom heater,you'll be taking cold showers. I'll not fix that heater,trust me,when I say that,I mean it to the very last. Maybe when you take cold showers everyday,you'll not sleep when you're to be getting ready for school. My friend,will you stand up! Look at the time,and you're not ready for school. Thank God I came,that is how you would have slept till Lord knows when. My friend get up!

I get myself off my bed,hoping and praying that she doesn't hit me when I pass her.
In order for this to happen,I had to run as quickly as possible. As I ran passed her I felt her fingertips brushing my elbow,Phew!! that was close!! If that hit landed on my arm,my story would have been told another day😔😔

So I was blessed by a raining morning,which resulted to me feeling cold. And now I fried the heater, there is no way I am taking a warm shower.
An idea just popped in my mind and I went to meet my mum

Me: Mummy,please can I use your bathroom? I promise not to spoil your heater.
Mum: No,and don't boil any water.
Me: But mummy nowwww,pleaassee,I'm sorry😭😭
Mum: I said NO!!! Its already 6:45,so you better hurry up and come out. Oya oya!!

I drag myself out of her room, 😭😭😭.
Now,time to face the cold water.

I step into the bathroom,already feeling cold,but not soo cold. Then I turned on the shower. You see,I stood by the side of the shower head and stretched my hand to open it. When it was open,I first put my feet,Chaiii,the water was COLD!!!!! It took a lot of moving and dancing and squealing,to finally come out of the shower.
I was soo cold! I had to rub a lot of Vaseline,which I don't rub at all!! I just felt that Vaseline was what I needed😀😀

So,I came out,dressed in my school uniform a thick sweater,a pair of stockings(very necessary) a head warmer(even though I'm not allowed to wear it in school,but who cares) and an oily face(don't blame me,I didn't know it was so much until my mum told me)😂😂😂😂

Thank u soooooo much for reading😘
This happens to be the longest chapter I've written so far,chaii,laziness ehn!
I hope u enjoyed it💖

Your annoying little fella,😜😜
Phayth❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤