As i was making my way to the park, I noticed that there were a lot of people. Maybe it was some kid's birthday and they were celebrating it there or maybe everyone just wants to be at the park today.
I looked around and I have to say the park looks cleaner. I kept looking around and saw a bench i could sit on. The bench was close to the swing sets and all the little kids seemed happy just swinging back and forth.
I miss being a kid. Feeling free without a care in the world. I saw that no one was using the wheel swing or whatever it's called so i decided to swing myself for at least a few seconds.
I really didn't care if anyone my age or anyone else saw me, I just wanted to have fun. And that's what i did.
I was swinging back and forth and i have totally forgotten what it felt like to swing on one of this things. The last time i swung on one of this i was like 8 or 9 years old.
After swinging for a while i stopped and was about to walk towards the bench i was sitting on a few moments ago. But i stopped once i realized she was there.
She was just sitting there reading a book. Another book. A completely different book from yesterday. I'm not stalking this girl i'm just watching her from a far and paying close attention to small details.
She's here almost everyday and i started noticing her a year ago. I don't know her name, i've never talked to her and i don't know why.
She seems like a calm, shy, smart girl. I could sit beside her right now and start talking to her but i'm not very good at socializing. So i'm not going to do that.
I just stood there looking at her.
"You should probably talk to her." I turned around and saw Michael.
"Dude, where the hell did you come from?" One minute i was looking at the book girl and the next Michael is behind me telling me to talk to her.
"Sorry i was walking around the neighborhood and saw you here looking at that girl." He explained. "You should talk to her."
I actually don't know why he was telling me this. We've never had a conversation so were not actually friends, just acquaintances who work together.
"I don't think so. I'm not very good at socializing." He just stood there and looked at me disappointed. "I'm sorry did I disappoint you or something?"
"Yes" He patted me on the back and i didn't understand what was going on. "Look you need someone to help you with your situation."
Situation? I don't have a situation.
"Umm... no i don't. I can talk to her but i'm not really good at socializing. It's not that i'm afraid or anything."
Michael just kept trying to help me but i declined his offer about 3 more times. He soon left after giving up on trying to help. I could talk to her but i'm not planning on doing it today. Maybe tomorrow or next week.
I saw that there was an empty bench right beside her so i decided to sit there. I don't know what she has but i'm curious to know why she has a different book. Probably because she finishes the books in one day.
Why am I trying to find the reason why she has a different book? It obvious. I'm so stupid.
She was now half way through the book already. She must be a fast reader. The books she reads are probably about 500 pages long.
"You know if you want to read the book just ask." She said but i don't know who she was talking to. She was still looking at her book.
She then looked at me with a smile.
"Me?" I probably sound really dumb right now.
"No one else is looking at me." Shit. She noticed.
I just stayed there quiet not really knowing what to say. I mean she caught me looking at her she must feel weird or uncomfortable.
What am i doing? "I'm sorry. It's just that you come here a lot."
Why did i say that? She must think i'm stalking her.
"Well i like the park. It's a good place to read a book." Her voice is so soft and she pronounces every word with caution.
"Yeah i guess. The afternoon breeze is nice." This conversation isn't going anywhere and i'm freaking out inside.
"It is." She smiled and her teeth were so white. "I should go. It's getting late." She closed her book not even putting a bookmark nor bending the corner of the page, got up from the bench and started walking.
"Wait." I called out making her turn around. "You didn't put a bookmark nor bent the corner of your page."
"Oh i remember where i stopped reading. See you later" She turned around again and left.
I'm so pathetic. I'm laughing at myself.
When i was in high school these things weren't that hard. It was easy talking to girls. I even had a girlfriend for 3 years. Now that i'm older it's harder for me. It shouldn't be, it should be easier.
I walked back home seconds later after she left. When i got there i realized i didn't even get her name. All i know is the same thing i knew yesterday. She likes reading. That's all i know.
Maybe if i come back tomorrow she'll be there and we can actually have a conversation. A long one.
